Our second group anthology-Submissions to Ignite by end of September, please. Showing 951-1,000 of 1,221

[Kath]

I must have read it an uncertain way then! ;)

[Darren]

Now that I've got my book out of the way, I'm ready to deal with this when Ignite and Patti are sure that it is grammatically perfect in every way.

[D.M. Andrews (author)]

I'm certain you did ;)

[Kath]

I think it will be coming your way by the end of the week Darren H. Thanks for your help - I'm sure it would be less successful wihout you.

[A.L.]

D.M. Andrews (GoodReads Author) wrote: "Jack and Jill went up the hill
to fetch a pale of water;
Jack came down and broke his crown,
and Jill went on a rampage of slaughter...

I call it Nursery Horror"

How about
Mary had a little lamb
she tied it to a pylon
10000 volts went up its bum
and turned its wool to nylon.

[Tim]

Said Jack to Jill atop the hill
trying to stop the slaughter
Put down that kalashnikov my dear
I didn't know she was your daughter...

[Kath]

Sounds like a new Group Book on the cards?

[[deleted user]]

Alexandra wrote: "How about
Mary had a little lamb
she tied it to a pylon
10000 volts went up its bum
and turned its wool to nylon. "

roflao!!!!!!

:0))

[Tim]

Roses are red, Violets are blue
So says the age-old rhyme
But Rose's are blue and Violet's are red
Hanging out on the line.

[Kath]

Now see, I keep telling people how important the apostrophe is - you are a lesson in precision, dear Tim, and how I love you!

[Simon (Highwayman)]

I have just had the first bit of feedback about the group book (kept my head down so far) and the word is "it is truly excellent"

Ok, four words.

[Kath]

I think it is and I don't have to say that. I wrote 2 of the poems and I know they are the bit that most people will skip over anyway.

(Edit to put space in the right place.)

[D.M. Andrews (author)]

Super, Simon!

[Simon (Highwayman)]

I was going to write another poem but went for the awesome and mostly true account of my part in the Falklands war.....

[A.L.]

I like the quote (I think it is anonymous).
God's plan made a hopeful beginning,
but man spoiled his chances by sinning.
We trust that the story
will end in God's glory
but at present the other side's winning.

Oh and as for apostrophes how about commas- "Let's eat Grandpa!" vs "Lets eat, Grandpa!"

[Kath]

Simon (Highwayman) wrote: "I was going to write another poem but went for the awesome and mostly true account of my part in the Falklands war....."

And I want your autograph!

[Elle]

Jack and Jill went up the hill
so Jack could lick Jills fanny
Jack got a shock and a mouthful of cock,
Because Jills a pre-op trannnyyyy!


*ahem*

Not very PC that..

[Kath]

Erm. Is this a family forum? I'm trying to pretend I'm shocked!

[Elle]

my older brother taught me that when i was only 9 years old!

[Tim]

Ignite wrote: "Now see, I keep telling people how important the apostrophe is - you are a lesson in precision, dear Tim, and how I love you!"

Not original, I'm afraid. I think I heard it on 'Hello Cheeky' or similar in the 1970s.

[D.M. Andrews (author)]

I think Nursery Horror just changed genre....


You were in the Falklands, Simon? I was too young :)

[Kath]

But you see, you're still good - you remembered it AND you didn't say the 1970's!
Teacher's pet!

[Marc]

D.M. Andrews (GoodReads Author) wrote: "I think Nursery Horror just changed genre....


You were in the Falklands, Simon? I was too young :)"

me, I was playing darts in my bedroom thinking, my country is at war on the other side of the world... Or in conflict anyway, since it was nevere declared a war

[Kath]

re the Falklands, i was living in portsmouth at that time so i "counted them out and counted them back in again" or whatever the exact words were...
i was also on telly in the background when the queen came to see the ships come in... :)

[Kath]

I worked in a school office and I remember one of the kids bringing in a Falkland Island coin for the school bank. I was never sure if it was legal tender but I accepted it.

[Patti (baconater)]

I'll be taking my kindle to bed early tonight, Ignite so how's about I email you with the few typos I've seen as soon as I get in from work tomorrow?

I should have time before Skype.

[Kath]

Fine chucky - I've probably already changed them - been through it all once. An extra pair of eyes is a good thing though.

[Kath]

Erm. It's Tuesday - Skype's Thursday.

[Tim]

Kath wrote: "re the Falklands, i was living in portsmouth at that time so i "counted them out and counted them back in again" or whatever the exact words were...
i was also on telly in the background when the q..."

Ha! Me too! Well, I lived in Southsea rather than Portsmouth, but I counted 'em out and counted 'em back with everyone else. Don't recall seeing myself on the telly though.

[Patti (baconater)]

Ignite wrote: "Erm. It's Tuesday - Skype's Thursday."

Darren and I have sorted an early Skype for tomorrow as the Thursday one happens too late for me now.

Will be 2pm tomorrow UK time. Everyone is welcome!

[Kath]

Ok. I thought you were as mixed up as I usually am!

[Kath]

hey tim - i also lived in southsea but i usually just say portsmouth for ease - i lived just back from canoe lake

[Tim]

I had a flat above one of the shops in Osborne Road, quite close to the Queen's Hotel :)

[Kath]

nice - not far from my school :) in fact i walked down there on saturday just gone...

[Jim]

Kath wrote: "re the Falklands, i was living in portsmouth at that time so i "counted them out and counted them back in again" or whatever the exact words were...
i was also on telly in the background when the q..."

I live on the outskirts of Barrow, we built the ships for both sides

[Jenny]

Anywhere with a large concentration of small children is a place of horror. Ask me how I know...

[Kath]

Hello chuck!

[Tim]

Hedging your bets eh, Jim? ;-P

[Jenny]

Oof I am 8 hrs out of synch, that's 'smart' phones for you. Falklands eh? Well I was quite a nipper at the time and it is inextricably linked in my mind with the whole Thatcher era, that was indeed grim for the North. I remember a friend of mine saying years later that Thatcher found the only world leader more right wing than she was to go to war with. That about sums it up for me.

Elle, your poem was awesome! I know a postop 'tranny' that would laugh like a drain at that.

[[deleted user]]

I was born in St Mary's hospital,lived the first year of my life in Copnor, then spent the next 30 odd years in Leigh Park, then bought my own flat in Fratton. Left about 8 years ago...

:0)

[Simon (Highwayman)]

Well...........

I didn't actually get to the Falklands but you will have to get the group book to find out, and even then you may struggle to separate the facts from the fiction :-)

[M.T.]

One of McOther's friends went to the Falklands on holiday. Flew a light aircraft up to Greenland, down the coast of the States and South America and then across. It took him two weeks there and back, fly a few hours each day, have a nice dinner in... insert country name here... fly on the next morning. All sounded very civilised to me. He has a field next to his house so he keeps the aeroplane in the garage and takes off, literally from his own back yard.

I would love to have that kind of holiday.

Cheers

MTM

PS He never substantiated the story about the penguins; harriers fly over, penguins watch, look up over and ooops, fall on their backs.

[Jim]

Tim A wrote: "Hedging your bets eh, Jim? ;-P"

Purveyors of weapons of mass destruction to politicians with minimal morale fibre, no matter what their race, creed, gender or disability

[Kath]

Karen (Kew) wrote: "I was born in St Mary's hospital,lived the first year of my life in Copnor, then spent the next 30 odd years in Leigh Park, then bought my own flat in Fratton. Left about 8 years ago...

:0)"

you're lucky. i have tried several times to leave the PO postcode - birmingham, hong kong, west coker, but keep coming back. i have managed to get off the island now but only got as far as a few junctions up the a3m :)

[Darren]

Jim wrote: "politicians with minimal morale fibre"

AKA politicians. The rest is redundant.

[Tim]

M.T. wrote: "One of McOther's friends went to the Falklands on holiday. Flew a light aircraft up to Greenland, down the coast of the States and South America and then across. It took him two weeks there and bac..."

I would love that :-D

[Rosen]

I'm thinking of doing a promotional photograph to accompany my submission.

[Kath]

What will you use? Have you got the originals or will you need to do a mock-up with masking tape? ;)

[D.M. Andrews (author)]

I'm thinking of including a thinly veiled threat with my submission, or possibly a large bribe...

[Kath]

The latter will do nicely!