Fun & Games discussion
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Grant a Wish, Drop a Curse
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I wish I had a personal chauffeur.
Granted but he is bad with directions, so always getting lost and making you at least an hour late regardless of where you are going.I wish I could be an extra in a Tyler Perry movie.
Granted, but you got lost on the way to the set and ended up being an extra in a Perry Mason remake. I wish you knew who Perry Mason was. :)
Granted but every time someone mentions Perry Mason you lose your memory and start barking like a dog for 10 minutes.I wish the world wouldn't end by a great fire.
Woof!I mean... Granted, but it's going to rain from now through doomsday and we don't have enough umbrellas.
I wish before Armageddon happens, I have time to order a pizza.
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I wish my library would deliver books to my house.
Granted but they charge you a hefty fee and one is for delivery and the other is if you want them to pick it up.I wish I would never get sick.
Granted, but the virus that would normally make you sick settles in your hair follicles and you lose all your hair.I wish my grown son would move out of my house.
Granted but he still comes over three times a day for breakfast, lunch, and dinner because he only moved into an RV that he has parked in your driveway.I wish that Oprah Winfrey would come across my latest book, love it so much that she tweets about it and all of her followers on twitter will purchase it too and I become the number 1 bestseller in the world.
Granted. Oprah read your book and was about to rave about it on national TV, but that episode was preempted due to a live interview with the former cast of Star Trek, the Next Generation.I wish they made more STTNG episodes.
(even though I really liked your book!)
Thanks! Granted, but for some reason each episode makes you have weird dreams about a talking donkey who steals your food and makes you sleep outside while he sleeps in your bed.I wish more people would purchase my book and also really enjoy it.
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I wish I had a maid to clean the house.
Granted that someone heard your plea and will send over Merry- Maids to do the cleaning who will end up overcharging you for their cleaning service.I am waiting for more honest reviews from those who have read my book.
Granted but your reviews are so bad that no company wants to sell your book and you have no choice but to sell them from the trunk of your car.I wish Thanksgiving lasted 3 days like the very first Thanksgiving Day Celebration.
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I wish I had free pizzas for the rest of my life.
Granted, but did you order enough for everybody?!I wish for pepperoni and double mushrooms on top.
Granted but now you have a terrible large rash on your face that will not go away and scares little kids.I wish the weather will be nice on Thanksgiving day.
*worth it!Granted, but all of your guests will come down with a bad case of turkeysomnolence and will have to spend the rest of the week recuperating in your apartment.
I wish I had a whole day off.
Granted but it's spent babysitting all of your friend's children who leaves your home destroyed when they finally go home.I wish I had a maid who would come and deep clean my home once a month for $50.
Granted but after the maid does a great job he/she moves away to never be seen again. I wish i had endless diamonds to play my favorite ipad game.
Granted but then a friend's child comes over and spills juice all over your ipad which causes all of your games to be erased.I wish the phone would stop ringing ever 10 minutes.
Granted, but the one call that gets through is from the IRS. uh ohI wish a world-famous chef (or anybody who knows how to cook) would come over right now and make me Eggs Benedict. And no food-poisoning, please.
(ha! nipped that curse right in the bud!)
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I wish my rent was cheaper.
Granted but your roof collapses during a huge rain storm and ruins all of your furniture.I wish someone would wash my car for free.
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I wish I had a new warm scarf and gloves.
Granted, but your new gloves only have 4 fingers and your new scarf is really itchy.I wish I would win Megabucks so I could spread joy and cheer throughout the land, buy myself a pony and a diamond tiara, and spread more joy and cheer throughout the land.
Granted but now you must deal with prank phone calls for the rest of your life.I wish I could spend the next 80 days shadowing a magazine editor so I could one day become my own magazine editor.
Granted. You are now the editor of Fish&Game, a magazine dedicated to teaching amphibians how to play Go Fish.I wish I had a Christmas tree that was cat-proof.
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I wish my streaming service showed all the movies and TV shows I wanted to watch.
Granted but only for 2 days but you miss the opportunity because due to a terrible storm you had to spend those two days in a shelter. I wish I could go back to bed and just watch classic Christmas cartoons and Christmas movies all day since it's raining.
Granted, but due to a terrible ongoing thunder and lightening storm you have no sound, and have to watch all of your classic Christmas movies and cartoons in closed-captioned.I wish I could find my Johnny Mathis Christmas tapes and the tape-player to play them in.
Granted but every time you play your tapes an earthquakes happens.I wish I was a billionaire, lived in a mansion surrounded with 24/7 security, and never had to worry about bills and being in want or need of anything for the rest of my life.
Granted, except for one thing. There will be no pizza delivery in your area. gasp!Great. Now I wish I had a pizza.
Granted but you order it and it is so cold outside that once it arrives the pizza is frozen solid. I wish I will wake up Sunday morning to a snow covered ground and spend the entire day watching my favorite TV show classics from when I was a child.
Granted, but you'll be stuck in a time/space continuum watching a never-ending loop of Saved By the Bell.I wish for snow too!
Granted but it snows so much that a piece of roof right above your bed collapses but unfortunately you weren't in the bed but your bed and room is destroyed.I wish I had a bottle of coke and a bag of fresh carrots right now to snack on.
Granted, but your Coke explodes when you open it and covers you in sticky sugary caffeinated goo. Enjoy the carrot!Still waiting on that pizza. I wish it would hurry up and thaw already.
Granted but while you wait for it to thaw a policer officer comes to your and says he has a warrant for your arrest and you have to leave your pizza behind. Turns out it was an error and you return home to find out a raccoon has broken into your home and eating your pizza.I wish I had purchased a large pizza today before the snow arrives tonight so tomorrow I could pig out the next few days while possibly being snowed in.
Granted, but there's been an outbreak of pizza-loving raccoons in your neighborhood, and before you get snowed in together, you have to order a 1/2 veggie and 1/2 pig. I wish we have snow for Christmas!
Granted but it's a blizzard and everyone gets trapped in their homes for a week.I wish I could spend the day with my friend watching movies and just hanging out around the house.
Granted, but your friend had one too many enchiladas and you had to fumigate your room.I wish I had an enchilada topped with sour cream and guacamole! And a big fan.
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I wish I had new carpets in my apartment.
Granted! It's Christmas and Santa has bestowed upon you new carpets. In pea-soup green.I wish I had a big walk-in closet.
Granted but it smells like fish and you don't know why and cannot get rid of the smell and you end up not being able to use it because the smell gets into your clothes.I wish I had a job in which I never had to work on Friday or Monday.
Granted you probably will get a job very soonI wish I didn’t have a medical problem
Granted but now every family member have mental problems and they think they are animals. Every time they come to your home they poop on your floor or in your yard.I wish odors released from the body didn't smell so bad.
Granted. To everybody else, you smell great. You, however, are locked into your own Pepe le Pew au de jour.I wish I knew how to use the new digital camera that's been sitting in my cabinet for 2 years now. Addendum: I wish my new digital camera isn't outdated right now.
Granted but now you forget how to do anything else.I wish bugs and other rodents would never get inside of homes and other buildings. Stay outside where they belong.
Granted, but now you're stuck outside with them. Eek! I take that back. Too creepy.Granted. The only ones you are surrounded with are butterflies and hummingbirds. whew!
I wish we'll get snow for Christmas, but apparently it's going to rain.
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I wish I had a Taco Bell near me!