If _____________ were ____________ then I'd be ___________________ .

[Kevin]

if ice cream were crack than i'd be pookie from new jack city.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bQEnzr...

[[deleted user]]

If bullshit was concrete, I'd be a super highway.

[Kevin]

^^^ my new fav comment of the week

[Phil]

If grammar nazis were rewarded with shoes for each mistake pointed out, I'd be Imelda Marcos.

By the way, Kevin, the thread title should say "then," not "than."

[Kevin]

dangit.

if grammar mistakes were bullets then i'd be an uzi.

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

If hair were dollars I'd be Warren Buffett.

[Sally, la reina]

If regrets were dollars then I'd be Dolly Parton.

[Phil]

If politicians were honest, I'd be flabbergasted.

[Sally, la reina]

Good one.

[Kevin]

if lower case letters were criminal then i'd be on death row.

[Félix]

If life were fair, I would have won Powerball by now.

[Suefly]

Here here, Felix

[Phil]

Where? Where??

[Félix]

There! There!

[~Geektastic~]

If I were a cupcake, then I would be a cannibal.

[Phil]

:)

[Sally, la reina]

Oh for heaven's sake.

[Jim]

You really have been in rare form lately Sallers.

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

At least that didn't post 4 feet wide and 3 feet tall, like some of the other images.

[Phil]

We need one four feet wide and three feet tall so J9 and Barb can hold it in their gigantic hands.

[Phil]

Could be freckles?

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Is there a special frosting tip for those?

[Phil]

No, but some of them come with a cherry on top.

[Scout]

Shoot me now if I'm going to have to see these on every thread.

[Jammies]

If wishes were horses, I'd be giving my herd to Sarah Pi.

[mark]

if Game of Thrones were on in an hour, then i could be fast asleep in two hours.

wait a sec.

if Game of Thrones was on in an hour, then i could be fast asleep in two hours.

[Félix]

Jammies wrote: "If wishes were horses, I'd be giving my herd to Sarah Pi."

Heard of horses? Well of course I've heard of horses.

[Jammies]

Félix wrote: "Jammies wrote: "If wishes were horses, I'd be giving my herd to Sarah Pi."

Heard of horses? Well of course I've heard of horses."

You can't have this one, it's Sarah's!

[Félix]

Jammarammadingdong.

[Phil]

Who's there?

[Lobstergirl, el principe]

Goofs.

[[deleted user]]

Goofs Who?

[[deleted user]]

If fifth-grade math homework knowledge was dynamite, I couldn't blow my nose.