Ten Reasons Not To Read Insufficient Mating Material

[Rowena]

10. Insufficient Mating Material are not words I feel comfortable waving about in front of gentlemen.

9. If it's about a man with a small penis, I don't want to read that... I see enough of that at home/at the office/on TV.

8. It's going to take about eight hours to read

7b. I find it totally implausible that a male could have a tattoo on his male body parts... and as for one that flashes in the dark, I'm not interested in the slightest.

7. The hero is a loser. I don't like books that take the antagonist from a previous book and give him a happy ending.

6. I don't identify with a heroine who is a little bit overweight, and who wears a corset (or any other tummy taming garment).

5. The family tree is at the back of the book. I'll be furious when I find that I wasted all that energy trying to memorize the characters' names and relationships.

4. I've heard that if I read Insufficient Mating Material in bed, my giggles and guffaws will annoy my significant other.

3. The F- word is used by the hero both as an expletive and as a verb.

2. If "Survivorman" Les Stroud loved it, there's probably too much information about hunting, fishing, camping, and surviving in the wilderness.

1. Apparently, it contains "a sizzling passion hot enough to singe" my "fingers as I turn the pages".... that sounds uncomfortable


What would you have made reasons #1 and #10?