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Feeling Nostalgic? The archives > MNN: Keeping the underinformed perpetually so

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message 1: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Today's MNN will be devoted to overhyped, sensationalistic coverage of the flu and flu-like viruses, since I'm currently suffering from one and I make the editorial decisions around here. If we don't scare you into living in a plastic bubble, we're not doing our jobs.

In a special iReport, Misha dons a vomit cam. Warning: Graphic images may not be suitable for some viewers.


message 2: by RandomAnthony (new)

RandomAnthony | 14536 comments Now, where are you going to don said vomit can? On your head, like a miner? Because you'll have to tilt it slightly so we get the full effect.


message 3: by Sarah (new)

Sarah | 13815 comments Just don't fix the vomit can in the actual can, please.


message 4: by janine (new)

janine | 7715 comments Will there be an interview with Jake Gyllenhaal?


message 5: by Misha (last edited Jun 27, 2011 10:21AM) (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) The vomit cam is indeed a "helmet cam," although no helmet is required. It can be strapped directly onto the head (we have one of these in my RL newsroom).

Actually, Jake Gyllenhaal and John Travolta will be interviewing each other about what it was like to portray boys in plastic bubbles 25 years apart.

We'll also have a home decor segment on creative ways to accessorize your bubble. There's no reason not to live in the height of style and comfort just because you live in plastic.

FastPoll: Who would you most like to lock inside a plastic bubble? Justin Bieber or ... sorry, I really can't think of a more appropriate choice.


message 6: by Sarah (new)

Sarah | 13815 comments Is the bubble soundproof? This would affect my decision greatly. And does it fit more than one? Could we put, say, all of the Kardashians in it?


message 7: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) In an upcoming business segment with bubble manufacturer BubbleTech about the growing plastic bubble market, we learn that bubbles can be made to a variety of specifications that include soundproofing and variable sizes.


message 8: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Does your new planet have lots of fjords?


message 9: by Sarah (new)

Sarah | 13815 comments Are you asking that in case we get to play a big game of...um...that video game where you have to keep the bubble from hitting the sides?


message 10: by Janice (new)

Janice (jamasc) Will there be pine surrounding those fjords?


message 11: by janine (new)

janine | 7715 comments Misha wrote: "We'll also have a home decor segment on creative ways to accessorize your bubble. There's no reason not to live in the height of style and comfort just because you live in plastic."

Lady Gaga! We need Gaga!


message 12: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17322 comments Mod
Leah has the same sickness as Misha!


message 13: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Poor kid! I hope it passes quickly. This crud really sucks.


message 14: by [deleted user] (last edited Jun 28, 2011 06:07PM) (new)

I am sorry you guys aren't well.

At this point I am pretty please I live in a snow cone. It's a flu free, vomit free zone. Imagine if something managed to get through my defences. How would I clean up?


message 15: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) BREAKING: Hospitals across America today reported record cases of alcohol poisoning and point their fingers at The Bachelorette as the culprit. Apparently, viewers made a drinking game out of contestant Ashley Hebert's mentions of "Bentley," "closure" and "dot dot dot." No deaths have been reported, but viewers are suffering an epidemic of brain damage according to some physicians.


message 16: by Lobstergirl, el principe (new)

Lobstergirl | 24149 comments Mod
. . .

I've been passed out drunk since 2005, as my drinking game revolved around use of the term "journey."


message 17: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) This is all just a figment of your imagination anyway.


message 18: by Phil (new)

Phil | 11627 comments LG, that sounds like quite a journey you've been on.


message 19: by Lobstergirl, el principe (new)

Lobstergirl | 24149 comments Mod
It has been quite the journey. But now I need some closure.


message 20: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Phil! I'm waiting for your first installment of the Michele Bachman TWSS series. Get it in the can or I'm giving your gig to Larry.

For reference, see the promo we ran at msg 536: http://www.goodreads.com/topic/show/4...


message 21: by Jammies (new)

Jammies Pssst...wrong link!


message 22: by Misha (last edited Jun 30, 2011 11:21AM) (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) No, it's the link I intended it to be. I just clicked it and it went exactly where I thought it would go -- to the thread where MNN originated.


message 23: by Jammies (new)

Jammies I swear it went somewhere else Thursday night!


message 24: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Maybe it snuck out for a party.


message 25: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Today we have a special exploring the psychology of people who just don't care about royal or celebrity weddings, or which designer the bride wore. Why are some people immune to the effects? What can we learn about what it means to be human from their indifference to nuptials of Kate Moss and Prince Albert of Monaco?

FastPoll: Whose dress was better — Kate Moss, Kate Middleton or Charlene Wittstock?


message 26: by Phil (new)

Phil | 11627 comments Couldn't say. I didn't look at any of them.


message 27: by janine (new)

janine | 7715 comments Kate Middleton!

End of discussion.


message 28: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Do you find it ironic that it was Britain's princess, rather than Monaco's, who wore the Grace Kelly dress?


message 29: by [deleted user] (new)

Not really as I fit squarely in the category of 'people who just don't care about royal or celebrity weddings, or which designer the bride wore' blah blah blah.


message 30: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Gail «Cyborg» wrote: "Not really as I fit squarely in the category of 'people who just don't care about royal or celebrity weddings, or which designer the bride wore' blah blah blah."

Sounds like you'd make an excellent interview subject for our piece.


message 31: by [deleted user] (new)

Maybe, maybe not. I figure I am missing the 'celebrity' cog in my brain.


message 32: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Would you let us do a brain scan on live broadcast while Hugh Laurie stands nearby and makes caustic remarks?


message 33: by [deleted user] (last edited Jul 03, 2011 04:37PM) (new)

Oh yes please. What if you don't find anything?
::bites nails::


message 34: by Jammies (new)

Jammies Special Reporter Jammies checking in from the International Institute of That'll Kill Ya:

MNN viewers, the IITKY has just released a study showing that simply breathing leads inevitably to death. Average humans can take anywhere from one to 148,000,000 breaths before their heart stops beathing!


message 35: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Question from the studio, Jammies: Isn't that the same institute that previously established correlations between death and eating, sleeping, drinking, walking and blowing one's nose?


message 36: by Jammies (new)

Jammies Yes indeed, Misha, the fine, scholarly folks at IITKY are always protecting us! They also released that study last year showing that food has calories.


message 37: by [deleted user] (new)

What astonishing wonders will they reveal to us next?


message 38: by Misha (last edited Jul 03, 2011 06:12PM) (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Important work they're doing there. *nods sagely for the camera and shuffles papers on desk even though I'm reading from the teleprompter*


message 39: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) What?


message 40: by [deleted user] (new)

Exactly!


message 41: by [deleted user] (new)

Never!


message 42: by Félix (new)

Félix (habitseven) Barb wrote: "I'm feeling much better."

That's all that matters.


message 43: by Jammies (new)

Jammies Were you a newt?


message 44: by Jammies (last edited Jul 16, 2011 03:44PM) (new)

Jammies Special reporter Jammies here in the field, Misha, reporting live in front of the home of a Mr. Random Anthony. Mr. Anthony told friends, and I quote, "I was at Target this morning and they had the summer merchandise on sale, so I got a new sun tea container for three bucks. It's in the sun now. I dig sun tea."

Since the two main ingredients in "sun tea" are DHMO and electromagnetic radiation, friends and family are concerned. At this point, Misha and folks at home, we don't know if Mr. Anthony is more of a danger to others, in which case SWAT will rush the house, or more of a danger to himself, in which case an IITKY strike team will attempt to simultaneously distract Mr. Anthony while removing this "sun tea" and any sugar-based food or beverage products from the property for his own good.

Now, over to janine at the International Desk, so she can tell us how the Brits feel about this abuse of their cherished tea.


message 45: by Misha (new)

Misha (ninthwanderer) Excellent report, Jammies!


message 46: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17322 comments Mod
::snort::


message 47: by janine (new)

janine | 7715 comments Good morning, Jammies! I have just returned from the British empire ::pants:: They are outraged at the notion that mr. Anthony decided to adopt sun tea instead of Pippa Middleton, like everyone else in the semi-civilized ::falls to floor from exhaustion::


message 48: by Janice (new)

Janice (jamasc) Love it, Jammies!


message 49: by Sally, la reina (new)

Sally (mrsnolte) | 17322 comments Mod
What is Janine doing up there when she ::pants:: in the middle of her post? Hiking up her trousers or breathing deeply to cool off?


message 50: by janine (new)

janine | 7715 comments I ran to the British isles to assess the situation, then ran back to report. Silly me, trying to be an actual journalist and reporting on real situations and actual opinions.


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