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Answer Machine (New & Improved?)- I'm Feeling All Knowing/Kevin: The Great and Powerful Oz/NOW TEMPORARILY THE "ASK CLARK" THREAD! >> Wisconsin Wedgies, Tag teamed back to Kevin/Squatting Shatner vs. Sally's birds
message 551:
by
Kevin
(new)
Mar 08, 2011 04:40AM
a magic eight ball. (i have a little window in the back of my head so that when i shake vigorously the answer floats into the window)
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how do you read the answer? do you use mirrors? do you have an assistant?
janine - i take a pic of the back of my head using my cell phone and a mirror and then see the answer backwards thus having to look at the pic in another mirror to get the answer. come to think of it, it is a pain in the butt
the great and powerful oz can't read backwards? i'm a little disappointed now.
yeah, i have undyslexia. everything i read is forwards and in correct order
Kevin "El Liso Grande" wrote: "RA - in the canyon?"
Am I the only one around here who caught this one? Must be a midwest thing...
Am I the only one around here who caught this one? Must be a midwest thing...
Heh.Ok, Kevin, one night you are on your motorcycle and a bright light appears in front of you...and suddenly you wake surrounded by aliens. One of them says, "take us to the most powerful person in the world!" To whom do you direct these aliens?
charlie sheen. if they are aliens, that is who they are looking for anyway. plus, he may save the world and then hollywood could make a movie about it. starring will smith.
clark - how i've waited patiently since writing that
Kevin (Answer Machine), in 573, the "charlatan with the answer" I referred to was the character in the story and movie. What, or whom, do you think the wizard symbolized in the story?
whoa scout. you are supposed to be lobbing easy questions to ol kev like "why is there air" and things like that. but to answer you query:it has been surmised that the wizard symbolized the president of the united states. through a series of smoke and mirrors he keeps people believing in him and then when forced to produce, he gives people what they already had in a pompous and grandiose way
If you're all-knowing, what does that make your wife?
Are you saying you're smarter than her?
Kevin "El Liso Grande" wrote: "all-glowing :)"Two words...disco ball! :p
RA - no, not smarter. She radiates, I postulate.
Nice answer re the Wizard. Thanks for the response. I finally looked for a translation of El Liso Grande>/i>. Reminds me of Sade's "Smooth Operator." Interesting moniker.
no prob scout. you can figure out mi apodo
When are you joining facebook?
Dear Kevin:What should I do with my collection of cassette tapes? (Rock, pop, classical.) I don't know if Goodwill or the Library annual book sale would be interested in my tapes or not.
RA - ahhh. a very difficult question to answer. now that i have been a holdout for so long i am more NOT joining just to not join. i really have no valid reason other than i really don't need something else to obsess over. i tend to be a tad OCD and i could easily get caught up in it. plus i don't need to see a pic of my third grade english teacher doing zumba on my updates.so to answer your question... tuesday
cynthia - prob worthless to anyone unfortunately. no one has a cassette player anymore even if you gave them away. here is what i suggest:get a cheap bottle of wine. start a fire in a secluded place. use a battery powered cassette player and listen to a few of your favs while you get warmed up (in more ways than one) and think about memories some of the songs bring back and toss them in the fire a few at a time until they are all gone. you will have done right by destroying them yourself with some meaning rather than just trashing them. hey hey my my, rock and roll will never die. there's more to a picture than meets the eye...
The boombox in my shop has a cassette player and a CD player.
Mod
nice phil. now you can be radio rahim as you stroll around the neighborhood with your boombox on your shoulder listening to grandmaster flash
Kevin "El Liso Grande" wrote: "cynthia - prob worthless to anyone unfortunately. no one has a cassette player anymore"
Ahem...
Ahem...
sorry, i want to retract that. send them to clark. his 8 track player is on the fritz so he can't listen to his 3 dog night favs jeremiah was a bullfrog
was a good friend of mine
i never understood a single word he
KER-CHUNK!
said but i helped him a-drink his wine
and he always had some mighty fine wine
singin'...
he wants to know if you have nazareth hair of the dog on cassette?
Damn straight. I have Nazareth on vinyl and cassette. Now you're messin with a Son of a BITCH!
should i bother paying attention in keyboarding class or get some much needed sleep?
Kevin "El Liso Grande" wrote: "sorry, i want to retract that. send them to clark. his 8 track player is on the fritz so he can't listen to his 3 dog night favs
jeremiah was a bullfrog
was a good friend of mine
i never understo..."
You really are great and powerful, aren't you?
But the 8-track's working fine. I just cleaned the heads.
jeremiah was a bullfrog
was a good friend of mine
i never understo..."
You really are great and powerful, aren't you?
But the 8-track's working fine. I just cleaned the heads.
What advice should I give the guy at the table next to me at the coffee shop who is WAY bombing what appears to be a setup first date? He 1) won't stop talking about back pain, 2) he mentioned his sister got him a job, and 3) has used the phrase "he's not all that" at least twice in the last five minutes.
esme - pay attention. they may change the name of the class if you don't. that happened to me. somewhere down the line it went from typing class to keyboarding
RA - i may be a little late with this answer but here is what i would pass along:"dude, if the intention of this little rendezvous is being the ass end of every joke this chick tells for the next 4 weeks you are doing great. if you actually would like to ever see a girl again a second time i would suggest going easy on the i'm the biggest loser in the solar system act and act like you've been here before"
Quite often I forget who I am. I don't mean that I don't remember my name. I just forget who I am really. It gives me a somewhat disconnected feeling. It's a good feeling and a slightly frightening feeling all at once.So ... who am I, really?
What's going to be in the fridge when you're in Amsterdam, and where will you be hiding the key for me?
RA - 7 kinds of hot sauce, 1/4 gallon of questionable 1% milk, shredded cheese of various sorts, pickled beets, something in tupperware i wouldn't open, crumbled blue cheese that smells like feet, decaying veggies and fruits, 11 partial used up salad dressings (try the makoto's ginger one), an empty pickle jar, 14 eggs, about 3.7 pkgs of tortillas and some diet rite's. they key is under the rock by the door where it always is
should i do my lab report tonight and my speech tomorrow morning, or my speech tonight and lab report tomorrow morning?
i should i just go to sleep and fake an illness tomorrow?
i should i just go to sleep and fake an illness tomorrow?
Why is it that at any time of the day I have a thousand questions to ask, but when it comes to this thread my mind is blank?
Mod
LG how do I get my pictures to sit side by side?
Mod
Don't insert a return between them.
Mod
That would be to do with the size of the pictures I would have thought.
Mod
True, the pictures have to be small enough to sit side by side.
You can always size your photos as needed.After the closing quote around the link to the photo, you can use the "length=xxx" and "width=xxx" parameters to set the size. The x's represent the number of pixels you want it to be.
< img="this is the url" length=200 width=150 >
The above (when properly formatted without the two extra spaces I put in, and with a sound URL) will give you a photo 150 pixels wide by 200 pixels tall.
Ta-da.
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