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Oh my God!!! How could the bride's aunt think that?! Ok, both you and the groom were white but there's nooo way you would have looked old enough to be his mom!I guess I could understand people thinking I was my dad's wife because, like I said, he looks young. I was in my early 20's and he was in his 50's.
This is going to sound bad but hubby has this expression "born grandma" that he uses when even young children have an older-looking face.
Mona wrote: "Oh my God!!! How could the bride's aunt think that?! Ok, both you and the groom were white but there's nooo way you would have looked old enough to be his mom!"
The aunt was batty! Even the bride thought so.
That's a funny expression! Is your husband from the South? It just sound Southern to me. :)
The aunt was batty! Even the bride thought so.
That's a funny expression! Is your husband from the South? It just sound Southern to me. :)
Jeannette, munchkin is now standing over me saying she's really hungry so this is my last post for now.I think "moody eater" is a better description because she is curious about foods she hasn't seen before. But she'll smell them first before putting them in her mouth.
One day she likes something and the next day she won't touch it and vice versa. The problem is I or hubby would eat/finish what she says she didn't like and then later she decides she wants it again and gets upset that it's gone. Hubby feels guilty about finishing it but I don't.
That's funny! But, you better get off the computer and feed your moody eater. :)
Jeannette, it is so hard to leave this site :).Hubby made up that expression. No, he's not from the South. We're from India. I emigrated here with my family when I was 4. He's only been here in the USA since '96. We had an arranged marriage,still very common in our culture but falling out of favor with the modern generation.
Hubby does come up with great expressions. He uses the word "architecture" to describe a person's body-type. He'll say something like "that person's architecture is disproportionate." He does have a great sense of humor but he can't tell jokes on command. He can come up with jokes/anecdotes to match the current situation(i.e. if we're at a wedding, he'll tell a joke relating to weddings).
Christine wrote: "Jeannette wrote: Welcome back kiddo!! I misssed your little doggie face! Did you go into the Tiki Room and then experience nausea? Did I warn you??I am glad you had fun and that you all got hom..."
Welcome back, Christine, and sorry about your children being sick on vacation. But, honestly, it is so easy to catch viruses etc. while on an airplane (and, really, if you know you are sick, you should not be flying).
Mona wrote: "Jeannette, now that you mention it, maybe I should have ran her over with my cart. We were in Sam's at the time and she was one of those people that go around asking if you own a home and try to se..."I think it's actually worse today Mona, people seem to have no idea that certain questions are not acceptable (and get huffy, if you make a sarcastic remark or refuse to answer).
Mona wrote: "Jeannette, it is so hard to leave this site :).
Hubby made up that expression. No, he's not from the South. We're from India. I emigrated here with my family when I was 4. He's only been here in t..."
Your husband sounds like he's a lot of fun! I've known several couples who had an arranged marriage, and the one couple, in particular, seemed very well-suited to each other. I worked with the husband and he thought arranged marriages were the best. I had to agree with his reasoning, too, even if I would never have wanted my parents to pick my husband! :)
Hubby made up that expression. No, he's not from the South. We're from India. I emigrated here with my family when I was 4. He's only been here in t..."
Your husband sounds like he's a lot of fun! I've known several couples who had an arranged marriage, and the one couple, in particular, seemed very well-suited to each other. I worked with the husband and he thought arranged marriages were the best. I had to agree with his reasoning, too, even if I would never have wanted my parents to pick my husband! :)
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Lee wrote: "I agree Gundula, I'm amazed at the number of personal questions complete strangers think it's appropriate to ask me or my daughter. And people on the phone are terrible! Total strangers calling ..."
Oh, Lee, just wait until you get "Why aren't you in school today?" or "What grade are you in?". Most homeschooled kids don't know what grade they are in. And, people always look at you funny when you are out with an 8 year old during the school day, like you are being truant!
Oh, Lee, just wait until you get "Why aren't you in school today?" or "What grade are you in?". Most homeschooled kids don't know what grade they are in. And, people always look at you funny when you are out with an 8 year old during the school day, like you are being truant!
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Lee wrote: "I agree Gundula, I'm amazed at the number of personal questions complete strangers think it's appropriate to ask me or my daughter. And people on the phone are terrible! Total strangers calling ..."Telemarketers are the worst, but even legitimate charities can be a real pain. When I was still living in Waterloo, a national charity called at 6:00 A.M. on a Sunday and was surprised that I not only was angry at being woken up at such an ungodly hour (and on the weekend), but also told them that I was now certainly not interested in donating money to their cause. Lee, did you sign up for the no-call list? I am actually glad that I did not, because I have heard horror stories of people who did sign up, getting more calls than ever, because somehow the list was sold to foreign telemarketers (and the CRTC has no control over them); many Calgarians recently received telemarketing calls from California at 4:00 A.M., and I seem to be getting many "you have won a trip" calls on my cell phone.
Start with "we homeschool" and if you are lucky, they leave it at that. Otherwise, you will get the "what about socialization?" question until you want to slug someone. You just have to grin and bear/bare (neither seems right!) it. Try to say less, rather than more. It's their problem, and you don't have to justify your choices to everyone!
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Jeannette wrote: "Start with "we homeschool" and if you are lucky, they leave it at that. Otherwise, you will get the "what about socialization?" question until you want to slug someone. You just have to grin and ..."It's one thing to be curious and to maybe ask questions if you and the person involved in the conversation are acquaintances (or friends), or if you are actually having a conversation about homeschooling, but total strangers ... (I wonder if this tendency of feeling like you have no privacy, of feeling like you have some obligation to answer even the most personal questions is a reason why many people become hermit-like or begin to dislike society in general).
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Lee wrote: "Gundula, I did sign up for the no call list but lately I have been getting several calls a day. :-("You should check if your information has somehow gotten into the hands of some unscrupulous telemarketers. And, if you keep getting calls, I would maybe contact the CRTC to complain.
People can be so rude and telemarketers are the worst -even, sadly, the legitimate charities. Ugh.On a more upbeat note I can't believe this group has 330 members!! That is amazing and a tribute to our wonderful moderators (yay Lee and Lisa!!) and all of us! This is a busy time of year and it is hard for me to read all of these great threads but I just wanted to say hello to everyone and welcome back to all returned travellers and have a great time to those who are soon to embark!! Happy summer! It's the most wonderful time of year!!
Lee wrote: "Jeannette, we already get the kindergarten question everytime we go out. I'm going batty and I hate feeling like I have to justify our personal choices to complete strangers. I need to come up wi..."
How about "They won't let me send her back to school until the X has gone away. I hope you've had it already!"
X being the most virulent contagious disgusting disease you can think of. *evil snicker*
How about "They won't let me send her back to school until the X has gone away. I hope you've had it already!"
X being the most virulent contagious disgusting disease you can think of. *evil snicker*
Jeannette wrote: Oh, Lee, just wait until you get "Why aren't you in school today?" or "What grade are you in?". Most homeschooled kids don't know what grade they are in. And, people always look at you funny when you are out with an 8 year old during the school day, like you are being truant! "
My favorite (NOT) is when people ask my son if he likes his teacher...it's confusing for him. My daughter loves to get that question from unknowing people because she'll answer, "no, she's mean," and laugh at me.
My favorite (NOT) is when people ask my son if he likes his teacher...it's confusing for him. My daughter loves to get that question from unknowing people because she'll answer, "no, she's mean," and laugh at me.
Jeannette wrote: ...you will get the "what about socialization?" question until you want to slug someone..."
I know! People seem to feel very free to ask that, and always right in front of my kids too.
I know! People seem to feel very free to ask that, and always right in front of my kids too.
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X being the most virulent contagious disgusting disease you can think of. *evil snicker*
OMG, ROTFL Hayes! That's awesome. I don't know if I could pull it off but there are some days when I would love to say that.
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I know! People seem to feel very free to ask that, and always right in front of my ki..."
And they are such a great example of being well socialized by the school system with all their rude and personal questions????
I think people are too keen to report truant kids or maybe kidnapped kids! They see a kid out of school and think it's their responsibility to get them back into school. Some are just curious and some are annoying. This same sales clerk in Panera Bread asked my daughter every week. And my daughter was 11 at the time.
I do think alot of people just want to make conversation, so I try to take it that way. It all comes down to tone of voice and body language. Like I said, less is more, so don't try to justify yourself, Lee. And, Christine, I am glad my daughter never got asked if she "likes her teacher"!! She would have had the same answer.
I do think alot of people just want to make conversation, so I try to take it that way. It all comes down to tone of voice and body language. Like I said, less is more, so don't try to justify yourself, Lee. And, Christine, I am glad my daughter never got asked if she "likes her teacher"!! She would have had the same answer.
As for telemarketers, I usually let the machine pick up and listen -- they don't leave messages. 2) If I pick up and the "air" is dead, I hang up. They computer dial and it takes them a few seconds to connect. I have hung up on my husband once or twice when he is calling me and doing something else. 3) Just say "No, thank you!" and then hang up. I do not consider it rude to hang up on an annoying stranger! 4) Complain. I have called charities that I regularly donate to and told them when a solicitation call has been rude. They listen up when they think there is money on the line!
So, Just Say No and then Hang up! :)
So, Just Say No and then Hang up! :)
Hi Mary! Nice to see you every so often! I don't know how I'll cope when I return from vacation. I'll just have to pop back in and delete a lot of emails! :)
Lee wrote: "Good advice Jeannette!"
Good luck! I let so many stupid things bother me and then I beat myself up afterward. So, avoiding telemarketers keeps me happier! :)
Good luck! I let so many stupid things bother me and then I beat myself up afterward. So, avoiding telemarketers keeps me happier! :)
Good grief, Charlie Brown. There have been a lot of postings since I checked (last night?). I guess I just want to add that I've come to the conclusion that when people ask rude questions, we should give them back rude. It's what they deserve. I agree, Lee, that it's not desirable to engage every rude person in a conversation trying to explain yourself. Because we want to be "nice" and not offend anyone or be curt with someone, we often try to answer such rude questions about home schooling and others. Mine was about when I was going to have a baby when I was going through infertility, treatments for it and a tubal pregnancy. I think we should just look the person in the eye and say something to the effect that "Wow, that's a really rude question, not going to answer it," and go about our business.
I can't keep up!!! ;-) Have skimmed.So, this group is so great mostly because of all the members who participate!!! Though thanks to Lee who started such a cool group that people want to hear.
I do the same thing with telemarketers. If dead air I hang up, if I pick up (I don't have caller id at home) as soon as I can tell it's not a friend or someone I know who has business calling me, I say No thank you and immediately hang up. I figure I'm doing them a favor, wasting less of their time. I know some people will stay on the line to waste their time but give them nothing but I don't want to waste my time and I also think that's mean; it has to be not a great job.
Re homeschooling, what a pain that people feel they can grill you. Some of the initial questions make sense though, if as part of an already ongoing conversation. Then, it depends on how they react when they get answers. Maybe as the schools continue to deteriorate (I'd like to be optimistic but I'm not) and homeschooling becomes even more common, people will be more aware than they are now.
Yes, Lisa & Lee, thanks again! This is a great group of people!
Good morning Kathy! You finally up and about? :) It is so hard to be rude, even to rude people, isn't it?
As for homeschool questions, I am always happy to answer questions brought up by curious people, in a conversation. It is the random acts of "this isn't my business, but I think it should be" questions that get to you. Still, short and to the point and then move away.
Good morning Kathy! You finally up and about? :) It is so hard to be rude, even to rude people, isn't it?
As for homeschool questions, I am always happy to answer questions brought up by curious people, in a conversation. It is the random acts of "this isn't my business, but I think it should be" questions that get to you. Still, short and to the point and then move away.
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I agree Kathy. Look them square in the eye and say it, "It's not your concern really, so don't be concerned about it."
It's hard to keep calm and I tend to the "Mad's snappy answers to stupid questions" routine, cause I just cant help myself!
*admonishing little devil sitting on shoulder*
It's hard to keep calm and I tend to the "Mad's snappy answers to stupid questions" routine, cause I just cant help myself!
*admonishing little devil sitting on shoulder*
I usually figure out what to say to a rude person AFTER the conversation is over.
Gundula wrote: "I usually figure out what to say to a rude person AFTER the conversation is over."
I hate that! I get half way home and have to stop myself from turning back to get the last shot in!
I hate that! I get half way home and have to stop myself from turning back to get the last shot in!
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Hayes wrote: "Gundula wrote: "I usually figure out what to say to a rude person AFTER the conversation is over."I hate that! I get half way home and have to stop myself from turning back to get the last shot in!"
Well, I might figure out what I should have said, but I would probably be too much of a coward to actually say it, especially if the rude comment came from a family member or someone I know rather well (I'm not as easily bowled over by complete strangers anymore, but family, acquaintances and "friends" are another story).
This conversation may be bad for me! I have vowed not to argue with my father-in-law on this trip! lol I'll have to bite my tongue a few times. xp
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He lives in Germany. We visit there for the first week. But, they have vacationed with us many times. The perils of marrying an only child.
Jeannette wrote: "He lives in Germany. We visit there for the first week. But, they have vacationed with us many times. The perils of marrying an only child."Jeannette, Why does that correspond to your husband being an only child? Because he feels obligated to spend time with his father/parents?
If my in-laws had several children, I think they might be happy visiting in turns. As it is, they only have us and while that increases our importance to them, it also increases our responsibilities to them. It doesn't help that they live 4,000 miles away, either. For a while they would visit twice a year. It does mean that every vacation of any length is spent with them. We can't visit them for just a weekend. Unfortunately, my husband is rather laid back compared to me, so any clashes with the folks involve me. The three of us tend to butt heads a bit. So, I plan to keep my flap shut this time, because I now what annoys them and I finally figured that it wasn't worth it in the long run!
Gundula: That's so true about some people crossing the line when it comes to personal questions and then THEY are offended if you choose not to answer. In India, it's worse. Some of the older generations think nothing of asking your salary,age,etc. Another bad habit there is the tendency to stare.Jeannette: about arranged marriage, I actually think it's a great system. It takes the pressure off of finding your own mate. If you DO find someone on your own, both parties inform their families and the families take it from there. In India, it's very much a marriage of families.
About homeschooling, that's our plan too for a number of reasons:
1. Scheduling flexibility -- hubby travels a lot for work and we often join him. Also, when we go to India, summer is so not the right time and Christmas vacation is not enough time.
2. Quality of education -- there is not enough manpower to give students enough one-on-one attention. Sometimes the ratio of teacher to students in public school is ridiculous. There is an improvement in private schools but still not ideal.
3. Supervision/safety -- there are just too many bullying incidents and not enough done about it until it's too late. School is just not as safe as it used to be. There are not thorough/comprehensive background checks on the adults interacting with our children.
We get the "socialization" issue all the time when we mention our plan to homeschool. Hubby always brings up the point about people who are and/or have been in jail/prison. How well-socialized are they?!
About telemarketers, did any of you guys see the Seinfeld episode where Jerry asked the caller for his/her home phone# so he could call later. The caller wouldn't give it out and Jerry says "you don't like to be bothered at home--now you know how I feel" and hangs up.We have caller ID so we don't pick up unless we know the person calling(and sometimes we still don't pick up:)). When we didn't have it, we let the machine pick up--they never leave a message. My parents don't have caller ID so they usually hang up on them.
Jeannette, Sorry for the stress. Hope the visit goes well.I love that Seinfeld episode, yes. I don't have caller id at home. One friend has caller id where it doesn't accept blocked calls and it doesnt ring until you unblock your number. I'd think that would eliminate most unwanted calls/maybe not the ones for charities and maybe not some others.
Re socialization of kids, whether schooled at home, in day schools, in boarding schools, elsewhere, I do think it so depends on the family/community how well that goes. It's not just the places where "schooling" takes place but the whole picture has to be looked at.
Lisa wrote: "Jeannette, Sorry for the stress. Hope the visit goes well."
It's my usual stress level! He's an old-fashioned, used-to-being-in-charge man, and I'm a stubborn, organizer type woman. Bound to clash! lol I stress about it less now than I used to.
Mona: way to go! There are quite a few homeschoolers here on Goodreads; I have met them on different boards. Any time you have a question, just ask. How old are your kids?
Schools are being asked to socialize our kids and it really is the family's job, isn't it? I don't keep my kid locked away all day. Most every homeschooler does not!
It's my usual stress level! He's an old-fashioned, used-to-being-in-charge man, and I'm a stubborn, organizer type woman. Bound to clash! lol I stress about it less now than I used to.
Mona: way to go! There are quite a few homeschoolers here on Goodreads; I have met them on different boards. Any time you have a question, just ask. How old are your kids?
Schools are being asked to socialize our kids and it really is the family's job, isn't it? I don't keep my kid locked away all day. Most every homeschooler does not!
Jeannette: I think that's the common myth that home-schooled kids don't see the light of day and that they're locked in some kind of dungeon.My daughter will be 5 on Sunday. We have plans for another one. Hubby wants me to "help" him(do the homework) with his on-line MBA too. He used to help me out a lot when I was getting my degree and he says it's payback time. I'm only one person! How much can I do?
First Grade is easy! I taught my daughter how to read and did some counting work. Everything else was just reading and experiencing. It doesn't get really interesting for a few years.
Tell him you need a cleaning lady! :)
Tell him you need a cleaning lady! :)
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Comfort Reads
Books mentioned in this topic
No Angel (other topics)The False Prince (other topics)
Para Handy Tales (other topics)
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Olivia Bean, Trivia Queen (other topics)
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Authors mentioned in this topic
Jane Austen (other topics)Rebecca Stead (other topics)
Ken Jennings (other topics)
Neal D. Barnard (other topics)
Nigel Tranter (other topics)
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Ah, the joys of a picky eater! Mine still doesn't eat breakfast a lot of the time.