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message 1:
by
Evelyne
(new)
Oct 07, 2025 03:30PM
I have had one of those days when I'm down and out and wished I had someone to talk to without any prejudice, so it makes me wonder if there would be more people out there who need someone they could talk to...
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Literally, my day has SUCKED.For one, my period's coming soon, so I'm overall just feeling kind of crappy and icky. I'm also having mood swings, which haven't helped. Today I've felt exasperated, silly/happy, calm, over the cliff anxious, mad, and now I've cried.
There wasn't even any big thing that made my day suck, it was just one thing bled into the other, and as a whole picture, it's a state of anger and melancholy.
Recently, I've been waking up not okay. I'll just start crying and refuse to get up and get ready. My mom and dad have to come downstairs and pull me up. FANTASTIC way to start a day.
Another thing, I stayed up late finishing homework (till about midnight), so I'm sore as hell.
I've had a tormenting headache all day, and it's just not going away.
In percussion, we had a sub. So the eighth graders (me) and the ninth graders had to partner and the ninth graders had to help the eighth with their parts (we have a concert in a week and I'm STRESSING.) It was ultimately humiliating and I feel like I suck at everything and I feel like a burden and a waste of time right now.
My room is a MESS. It's on my list of things that I need to do, but since I have a million school-related things to do, I've been procrastinating on my room. Since it's such a mess, it's not a calming or educational environment for me, so I've been in the main basement family room watching Stranger Things for the past week or so.
When I got home, my sister was watching her annoying teen-bopper show, and though I HAVE been watching Stranger Things, I've already seen it a few times, so it's not as distracting. I asked her politely to go upstairs so I could do my work. She ignored me. Again. Nothing. I asked again. She still ignored me.
Pissed now, I asked her more forcefully, my voice raised. My dad didn't hear the prior conversation, so I was the one accused.
Omg my day was insane as well my periods coming soon also! So im super self conscious bc my face is a literal zit breeding ground. And to top it all off i dont like my teachers threw are rude mean and just unkind and annoying. I’m all for being inclusive but when i have 4 QUIZZES TO MAKE UP from when i was gone on Friday last week and teachers who still haven’t sent me the work that i need to make up. I’m so swamped with homework and on top of that right now im babysitting my little sister who just wants to blare bluey all the time which is super distracting. It’s almost 9 o clock I haven’t had a shower and i have 2 pages in my planner with homework written down. I can’t study in my room bc my parents are worried i “wont have a good study environment” it’s so hard to study anywhere else. And when i ask my parents if i can study upstairs in my room or if they can quiet down my siblings all they say is “no its not our fault that you can’t study” like WHAT THE HECK YOU LITERALLY HAVE MADE A NO STUDY IN ROOM RULE. And i also haven’t had dinner because i was grinding on my homework that my sister just kept getting more and more food while I hadn’t even had firsts yet and i want to save some for my younger brother when he comes home from practice and im too tired to actually make food bc we are an ingredient family not a snack family so i have to get out pots and cheese and cheese graters raw noodles and everything to make simple Mac n cheese. Also I haven’t worked out in over a week and i feel fat bc i have no energy and am so exhausted all the time and i dont even have time! And all i want is a longer nights sleep and less stress but right now i dont see how that’s possible. Also my mom told me to clean the house bc our house cleaner is coming tomorrow and i just can’t stop sitting here grinding on essays and studying for tests. And im am writing this bc i just physically can’t be productive anymore.Also disclaimer im not mad at my parents just exhausted.
Thanks so much for this btw, So today I went to school and saw two boys (college students) pointing and giggling when they saw me. Same thing happened yesterday but it was a girl whispering to a guy whilst staring at me. I’m really uncomfortable with people doing that and then I’d get conscious and think I look bad but I don’t? Maybe they heard rumors about me in the past? Irdk

