Goodreads Authors/Readers discussion
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Back to You...
Romantic Comedy
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Need your opinion on first line
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I like Pain in the ass. It tells me I am going to probably enjoy this character, but Despicable... This intrigues me. Many people are a pain in the ass, but most people would not define themselves as despicable. This tells me this might me a character I will be fascinated with. Love a character with morality issues. So, I pick 2.
Marie wrote: "I like Pain in the ass. It tells me I am going to probably enjoy this character, but Despicable... This intrigues me. Many people are a pain in the ass, but most people would not define themselves ..."Thank you so much for taking the time to reply. Your comment really helps me making a final decision. I wish you all the best!
"I haven't always been despicable," is my choice, too. It's more descriptive and broad. I want to know more about his current state of his despicable-ness, and I'm eager to know what led up to it. 'Pain in the ass' really doesn't say much.
Thanks for your inquiry; and thanks to those who've answered your question. This is an example of how author's can help one another.
cbmacfarlanebooks@gmail.com. Good luck on your writing. Amazing how frequently we re-write those first lines. I just finished a complete overhaul of my first chapter. The beat goes on, as they say. Happy Holidays!
Depends upon the character's background and personality. Which phrase most sounds natural based upon the character's conversational vocabulary exhibited throughout the story?
Jim wrote: "Depends upon the character's background and personality. Which phrase most sounds natural based upon the character's conversational vocabulary exhiited throughout the story?"Richard wrote: "Hi, I would like to know your opinion.
Which first line piques your curiosity the most?
"I haven't always been a pain in the ass." or "I haven't always been despicable."
Thank you!
Best wishes,..."
I agree with Jim. "Despicable" works for a character that is probably more evil than infuriating. "Pain in the ass" sounds more like someone that is difficult to get along with, but doesn't go out of his way to remove a butterfly's wings for the fun of it.
On top of that, it probably should reflect the tone of the story itself. If the story is going to be humorous, "pain in the ass" works and "despicable" dilutes whatever humor might be coming. If the tone is to be dark "Despicable" probably works better and "pain in the ass" will sound too flippant.
David wrote: "Jim wrote: "Depends upon the character's background and personality. Which phrase most sounds natural based upon the character's conversational vocabulary exhiited throughout the story?"Richard w..."
Your comments have given me a lot to think about. I have chosen "a pain in the ass" since the character is more infuriating than evil. Many thanks for all the replies. I wish you all the best.
Which first line piques your curiosity the most?
"I haven't always been a pain in the ass." or "I haven't always been despicable."
Thank you!
Best wishes,
Richard