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The so called "New Normal"
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@ AJ-Completely understand why "The New Normal" is stressing you out. I am there with you. In Michigan masks are required at all indoor businesses that are open, and yet people are still walking around the grocery stores without them. I went to a Bridal shower this past week-end, and even though the hostess had masks set out at the door, my daughter and I (we brought our own) and 1 other woman were the only people who wore them. Thankfully it was outdoors and we could huddle in the corner-we only stayed about an hour, my anxiety got the best of me. I was telling my therapist the exact same thing, about how my stress level was so much worse, now that I am expected to go out in the world. She gave a me boost when she told me I was not alone, and that it was OK to be feeling this way. I feel for all you younger people who are expected to "just get out there" whether you are ready for it or not. I am retired/disabled and so I have really no where I have to go. However, I am taking my therapists advice and slowly venturing out to run small errands. Baby steps is all I can take right now, without having a nervous breakdownMy thoughts are with you and Doughgirl as you await results on your friends and family-
We're choosing to remain at home for the most part. My husband and I are introverts, so it's not a hardship for us. My daughter suffers the most, as she is such a social being. My son lives mostly online with his friends so it's not very different for him. Exercise is the thing that has suffered most. We walk the dog but have found ourselves rather lazy. I miss eating out though, but at least we are saving money. Though we did end up eating at a restaurant a few days ago when the place we originally chose turned out to be closed early, and then we found another restaurant nearby (I was hankering for Filipino food) and we took so long deciding what to get that my husband said, let's just eat here!
On the bright side, my daughter is pushing us to Marie Kondo the house, and we are all reading the book together now. Target is to begin within a week and start with our clothes. Hopefully we can actually get this done - being semi-quarantined is the perfect time to declutter!
I'm so sorry to hear about your boyfriend, AJ. :-( I hope the test comes back negative. I'm still working from home. I wish they'd require face masks on people, especially on public transit. I don't drive, but hadn't taken transit since mid-March till 3 days this week!!! All at once. I went to work (to bring more stuff home), and had appointments. Two more appointments next week, but only one where I have to take the bus.
Doughgirl5562 wrote: "In sum, I agree. It was all easier when we were under quarantine. Many people act like life here is "back to normal" - but it's not. "
Yes, exactly! I feel like that's why people aren't wearing masks, etc (at least part of the reason) - the more things open up, the more it seems normal again, so people go about doing their normal things in their normal ways.
Oh no - here's hoping for your brother, too. :-(
annapi wrote: "I miss eating out though, but at least we are saving money."
I, too, am such an introverted homebody - I don't want things to go back! (In most ways.) But, like Anna, I miss eating out with friends. I have also been looking at it as a bright spot in saving money. I have ordered pizza delivery twice, though. I will one more time soon, as it's a place I want to try.
NYC is barely in Phase 2 reopening and our numbers are staying down. I could go back to my office more, and it would be fine there, but it is the public transportation to get there and home again. I am going to continue to work from home mostly, indefinitely. But iI work for myself and can do that. I am ok with taking it slow and avoiding people.But too many other states are being incredibly careless and stupid. And Washington! So people buy it and go without masks etc. Well not me.
And I am planning on mysteries, thrillers, and romance for a while now that Proust and I have ended our affair.
Here in Madison WI, most people are good with masks, but even in stores some employees are only wearing them over their mouth or not keeping them on. Friends who are older are still doing only delivery or no-contact pickup for groceries, but I have started going out for that. I went to spend 10 days with my daughter in St. Louis and it seemed very few people on the streets and going into businesses were wearing masks. She is going through cancer treatment and has to be extra-careful. She has been able to see a couple people outdoors but it's a real drag, as she is very social. She is hoping to come to see us over July 4th, her first trip in many months. The rest of the theater season as well as opera was just canceled all the way to the end of the year. That's something I'll miss, though I am happy there will be some baseball. The "new normal" is really hard on my husband who belonged to 4 choirs and had trips planned every month from May to September.
Massachusetts is one of the four states on track to containing the virus, thanks to the leadership of our four governors, and to the collective wisdom and humanity and compassion of our residents (in general). But like Theresa said, we are scared of the massive spiking everywhere else, and my newest fear obsession is that the Delusional Emperor is planning to bring his corona infested retinue to New Jersey, which to me, bringing in a large group of people who are carrying the virus and shedding it wherever they go, is a crime, no matter how much I might enjoy the lack of turnout and protest he will likely receive in New Jersey. There is not likely to be a whole lot of racuous support for him there. In any case, I want to see us lick and kick this thing so we can get back to our lives. I want that for everyone, for my kids. I miss my parents who are thank god healthy. I want to be able to take my oldest to visit colleges, and to enjoy his/their HS experiences. I want the world to be safe. I want to travel and live fully - and we will. One good news about the massive spiking, is that we are indeed developing a hell of a herd immunity, if that should help us. Prayers for safety for everyone.
My brother's test came back negative. Yay! I'm hoping for good results from your boyfriend's test, AJ.I am out of groceries until I go shopping later tonight (The best time to go to Target is Friday night. The store is practically empty.) so I made a quick run to the convenience store for a few things. I was the ONLY person that I saw - inside or outside - wearing a mask or gloves. Sigh …...
Well, I turned the news on today and saw the U.S. Map, and how many more states are spiking, and I cried. It just came out. The map looks like it did back in March-movement coming in from East and West and closing in.
I worry about the high numbers so many places in the U.S. are seeing, especially Texas, North Carolina and Florida as I have family in all 3 states. It makes me anxious seeing charts that show Michigan as having increased cases, though overall still not bad having gone from around 200 cases a day to 300, but as we've opened up a lot fear it will get worse. My fiance has been having shortness of breath and a cough which is most likely due to heart problems but out of caution his cardiologist suggested everyone in our house get tested for COVID. We went yesterday and it pissed me off that as we were sitting in car waiting for them to come administer the test people were walking into the restaurant next door without masks. We've only been in doctor's offices as I can work from home but his daughter who lives with us works in a pharmacy. She says most people wear masks at least in the store.I'm glad your brothers test was negative doughgirl. Hope your boyfriends is as well AJ.
The UK's numbers are currently going down, but a load of stupid people have been visiting the beaches due to our heatwave. I'm expecting a spike any day now.
I have several different chronic illnesses so have been shielding and staying in, only going out for essential hospital appointments. I was meant to be able to go out 1st July, but this has been extended 1st August. :-(
I have several different chronic illnesses so have been shielding and staying in, only going out for essential hospital appointments. I was meant to be able to go out 1st July, but this has been extended 1st August. :-(
Jenny wrote: "The UK's numbers are currently going down, but a load of stupid people have been visiting the beaches due to our heatwave. I'm expecting a spike any day now.I have several different chronic illne..."
I feel for you Jenny-I am high-risk with multiple reasons-I won't even go to the Doc office-have been doing tele-health appointments.
Again, the emperors talking about coming to New Jersey, and bringing his corona infested retinue. I lie awake up thinking about this! We four states that are on track to contain this, Don’t mess with us! Texas put down new rules today, which well are the most restrictive they have had are barely even effective!
I'm in Florida and we are going back up in numbers big time. Our state was one of the last to close down and one of the first to open and the result of that is not good. Our governor parrots the president and thinks that a lot of the rise in numbers has to do with "more testing leads to higher numbers." He does seem to wear a mask so that part is different that his idol (Trump). People around here are about 50/50 with wearing masks. My husband and I are lucky to be retired so we don't have to go out to work or think about sending our kids to school when it starts up in August. I am a quilter and our Guild and Chapter have been making masks for lots of organizations. Right now we are making them for the teachers and students for when the school reopens. I hope that helps!
My husband is an introvert and has been happy enough to be at home. Since this hit us in the early spring, planting/gardening time here in FL, we spent a lot of our time outside working on our gardens. We have done our exercise by walking in our community and that's been nice until the heat hit (high 90s today!)
I'm embraced my inner introvert and have really enjoyed returning to my early years of homemaking. Not house-cleaning, I hate that, but I love to cook and bake so I've gone back to bread baking and trying out new recipes for dinner. Also the sewing mentioned above and the gardening has been very satisfying. Now if I could just learn to love house-cleaning I'd be all set.
I certainly sympathize with you. My grown sons are dealing with the school kids at home and working. My DIL is an ICU nurse but luckily my son can work from home and he is able to see to the kids OK. They also live where the virus numbers are low, unlike FL and TX, etc.
At this point, I am completely unsettled. Our county, Yolo in California has had an increase in cases, which appear to be mainly from home gatherings over Memorial day and graduations. Everyone wears a mask, but I rarely go out.We are moving to reopen our preschool which is at a local Community College. We had major work done on it, which was put off until the last minute. Our Program Director wants it open on July 1, but the flooring is not going to be installed until Monday, the 29th, provided it is completed on time, it would give us only one day to put everything back together, which is pretty much impossible. So there's that.
I had a mammogram at the beginning of June and they asked me to come back for further pictures today. I am going to need a biopsy which will have to be done in Sacramento.
I am 67 and thought of retiring last December, but as I was enjoying myself, I didn't. If I could have foretold the future, I would have. But that is a little beside the point. I don't want to go back to work and be around more people and jeopardize, my ability to have the biopsy. I have a call in to my doctor to discuss this and assume that he will give me a doctor's note.
Booknblues wrote: "At this point, I am completely unsettled. Our county, Yolo in California has had an increase in cases, which appear to be mainly from home gatherings over Memorial day and graduations. Everyone wea..."Good luck with the test. I'm glad you can actually get it now Our local cancer hospital is more or less back to normal, with extra precautions of course for anyone who enters the building. It was so frustrating for people who couldn't get needed tests and treatment right away.
67 is a good age to retire as you'll get full SS benefits. I was shocked to realize that I'll be qualified for partial benefits soon (I'm almost 62).
Amy wrote: "Again, the emperors talking about coming to New Jersey, and bringing his corona infested retinue. I lie awake up thinking about this! We four states that are on track to contain this, Don’t mess wi..."Can the State patrols keep them out? LOL
My New Jersey friend has not responded to me on this. But trust me - like Hell they are going to lay back. Already the Emperor is insisting he won't wear a mask because as its leader, he is not a country citizen and cannot be forced. But everyone else in the venue will have to. There is already a 14 quarantine edict to enter the state. Believe me, they will not let his retinue go to the ATm or get a hot dog. They are not staying in hotels apparently its just for a few hours - but who the hell does he think wants to see him in New Jersey?
Doughgirl5562 wrote: "My brother's test came back negative. Yay! I'm hoping for good results from your boyfriend's test, AJ.I am out of groceries until I go shopping later tonight (The best time to go to Target is Fri..."
Great news! Sucks about being the only one with a mask.
Coming home from yesterday's appointment on the bus, I wanted to say something, but didn't when a guy a couple of seats ahead of me was coughing. No mask. GRRRRR!
Booknblues wrote: "At this point, I am completely unsettled. Our county, Yolo in California has had an increase in cases, which appear to be mainly from home gatherings over Memorial day and graduations. Everyone wea..."BnB-hoping the films were just blurry-or that you are like me and have calcium build up
But I can't be focused on New Jersey and not respond to Fran. We are with you with every blessing for getting through this second set of pictures and biopsy, and having whatever happens be a clean and easy resolve. You are not alone. We are in it with you.
"Emperor'"s golf trip was canceled, they won't say why. Not sure they are savvy enough to realize it would be a bad image, the Nero fiddling memes would return.
LibraryCin wrote: Coming home from yesterday's appointment on the bus, I wanted to say something, but didn't when a guy a couple of seats ahead of me was coughing. No mask. GRRRRR! ..."This is the kind of thing that drives me nuts!
Amy wrote: "Again, the emperors talking about coming to New Jersey, and bringing his corona infested retinue. I lie awake up thinking about this! We four states that are on track to contain this, Don’t mess wi..."Which is way too close to NYC for my comfort! I'm hoping NJ governor, with the support of Cuomo and the Gov. CT manages to include him in the travel bans....as in weren't you just in FL? You have to self quarantine for 14 days.... bet he'd suddenly changed his mind.
@Amy - my nightmare is that he decides to stop by Trump Tower....although we New Yorker's might actually lynch him if he were to do so.
Ah I just saw he cancelled NJ - thank god. All who have posted these last few days -- I was reading but no time to post -- I'm thinking of all of you, all the nerves, the worries, the fears, waiting on results, needing tests, everything and nothing.
I'm so leary of going out - I did not even go into my office as planned today but put off to Monday when a client stops by to get a signature notarized. But I am fortunate to be able to work at something I love from home, and I am my own boss. The work has been crazy, long, exhausting, and clients very needy, but that's not all that unusual. I hear over and over again how carefully everyone is reopening here in NYC. Seems all anyone is talking about is braving the hair salons and barber shops! And being so reassured at the efforts made to protect employees and customers. Men as well as women are all telling me how wonderful it feels to finally get a haircut - no gender differential there.
Of course, as I've posted in the Kaffeklatsch thread, there are plenty out without masks or improperly worn masks, and I hear there have been some issues at bars and even some other areas. But the numbers 2 weeks after the first protests remain low, still dropping. That's encouraging becuase the protesters were outside and wearing masks, and where there were sit-ins, there was social distancing. I'm sure there are protestors who ended up testing positive but I think what's happened is that with everyone else being so careful. the numbers still drop, just maybe not as much as they might have done without the protests.
The news from FL, TX, etc. is horrific, their battle has barely begun. I just am so very thankful that we had Gov. Cuomo, and the neighboring states and the region, regardless of political party, joined together and united to fight this. Took their jobs seriously, took charge, and took responsibility.
I hope I never see medical tents in Central Park again, or our convention centers turned into hospitals. If to help make sure that doesn't happen, I have to WFH indefinitely and become a hermit, so be it. I can adapt.
And that's what we are all doing - adapting. Social events for me now revolve around meeting a friend in the park where we sit on socially distanced park benches eating lunches we brought, drinking something we bought at the nearby bar, and gossiping. Usually this would have been over dinner in a favorite restaurant or in one of our living rooms. Now it's a park bench with take out. We call them progressive park sits -- we sit on benches for a while, and if it gets too crowded, we pack, walk a short distance, and settle in again. We even bring our books and quietly read together for a while.
We can only make our own decisions and choices and protect ourselves as much as possible.
BnB .... sending prayers and healing thoughts your way for a good outcome of the additional testing. I've had to go through that as well, so I know how anxious and fearful it can make you feel. The Orange Man was in Wisconsin yesterday (or the day before?) .... but up in Green Bay, so no where near us. Thank heaven!
I worry for my brother, SIL, nieces and nephew in Texas. They're pretty much working from home, but my brother owns some rental properties and he does have to tend to them on occasion. They are - at least - taking precautions, wearing masks, washing hands, using sanitizer, etc.
I'm also concerned for my other brother, who is the executive director of a very large continuing care retirement community. They've had only one positive case, so far ... It was a resident in independent living (NOT in the nursing home); that was a month ago, and that person has recovered. No one else in contact with that person has tested positive. But the stress and long hours are taking their toll. My brother will be 67 in August and I've suggested he might just want to retire.
Hubby and I have ventured out a couple of times to a restaurant. We're sticking to off-hours (dinner at 3:30, anyone?), or places with outdoor dining and significant space between tables. So far, we haven't seen a spike in Wisconsin, but from what I see in other states, I'm thinking we'll probably see it here as well.
Hi, Amy, it's great to hear from you! I am sorry to hear about your boyfriend, but hopefully he tests negative and is just having a regular winter virus!I'm also in Massachusetts where, as Amy said, we haven't spiked since we started opening things up. I live in a different county than she does. Most people in stores around here are wearing masks. Some where the most inane and useless coverings,and some have their noses exposed if their masks don't fit well, but most people are on board.
I drove by a demonstration against egregious educational cutbacks and everyone there was wearing a mask. I gave them a thumbs up as I drove around two sides of the rotatry (Massachusetts for roundabout, traffic circle, etc, but this one isn't a circle) because they are cutting out school library staff among other things. Since band was not only an important part of two of my teens' lives and the band staff is FABULOUS and provides a continuity in high school you don't get anywhere else outside of JROTC and for many, many other reasons, I am outraged even though my kids are finished.
However, I suspect that the cutbacks come from higher up the money chain than the local school board and are a direct result of COVID money given to help companies and individuals during the quarantine.
Thanks, everyone for all your positive thoughts.Will get this figured out. It is my third (breast) biopsy over the years. This being in Sacramento rather than local makes it a bit more difficult, especially when they mostly want people to come alone, but c'est la vie.
AJ wrote: "Hey my PBT friendsHow is the "New Normal" panning itself out for you?
Where I live, we are starting to open up all of our business and our schools. I am back to a somewhat normal routine I guess..."
AJ, being stressed about coronavirus is a good thing.
I live in a place where its not taken seriously. Georgia was one of the first states to open up and many walk around without masks. My work takes me in restaurants, grocery stores, convenient stores, and other places of business. I am around people all the time. I wear a mask most of the time but what I've found, the longer it goes on, less anxious I become. The less anxious I become the more I forget my mask in the car. The less I think about coronavirus. This is more dangerous.
Being stressed and anxious and cautious is good thing that protects you and others. I have to consciously fight myself to keep my urgency. Everytime people go without a mask or needlessly are needless in public places and they don't get sick, it feeds into confirmation bias, conscious or unconscious.
So take pride in being stressed and anxious. It means you care.
Jason - that is so true. For yourself, please be careful.
Jason wrote: "So take pride in being stressed and anxious. It means you care..."Agreed! <3
Karin wrote: "I drove by a demonstration against egregious educational cutbacks and everyone there was wearing a mask. I gave them a thumbs up as I drove around two sides of the rotatry (Massachusetts for roundabout, traffic circle, etc, but this one isn't a circle) because they are cutting out school library staff among other things.a..."I "worked" in a school library as a volunteer because they didn't have hired staff in the elementary level only in HS and, finally, in the middle school. I don't know what it is about MA and cutting school library funding! I actually think it's not just MA, the finance people never see the value in libraries, especially in schools. They want the kids to go to the public libaries (also often underfunded) but they don't build their collections based on the curriculum of the school, where school libraries do that as their main goal. Makes me so angry!
I hope he feels better. And that you and yours stay safe!
AJ wrote: "Thankfully my boyfriend doesn't have Covid-19, he is just very sick with flu"Such good news-Ha! who would think we would ever think getting diagnosed with the flu would be good news. I hope he is feeling better soon
Joanne wrote: "AJ wrote: "Thankfully my boyfriend doesn't have Covid-19, he is just very sick with flu"Such good news-Ha! who would think we would ever think getting diagnosed with the flu would be good news. I..."
I was thinking the same thing - good news! But, wait....!
Hope he's feeling better soon.
AJ,I feel you. I live in a state that doesn't care. The residents see COVID as nothing more than the flu so only 10-20% wear masks and 50% of those wear them properly. Even though the state government is in league with the Orange Cheeto and opened up our state way too soon, they are at least requiring business employees of retail to wear masks and businesses to allow their employees to work from home if they can.
I left my job in May 2018 so I don't have to worry about going to work. But my husband's company lost its investor due to COVID in early March and they filed for bankruptcy and now my husband is also jobless. Fortunately, the stimulus and unemployment is helping us because there are no jobs. He's been looking and applying since mid-March to no avail.
I still haven't eaten in a restaurant, but my husband and I do takeout every now and then. We have one couple that are our best friends. We know where we've both been so we get together once a week. Otherwise, we all just stay home. I go to the pharmacy but otherwise, I use the store's curbside grocery pickup.
Even though I am anxious, especially since my state's (Utah) numbers have been rising horribly, I've been doing okay with quarantine and hermiting. As I said in the Footnotes thread, I used to play Animal Crossing for 10-12 hours a day to help keep my anxiety in check. But, about three weeks ago, I started only playing for 2-3 hours a day.
The thing I miss the most is going to the movies. My state is opening the movie theaters in a couple of days, but I'm not going to go. I don't think it's safe enough yet. I won't even go to church services right now.
I hope your boyfriend is feeling better. One of my friends (not the one I hang out with) was diagnosed with COVID about a week ago. She's a nurse and I feel so bad for her.
The thing I miss the most is theater. I was supposed to see several touring Broadway musicals and operas this year and of course they are all canceled till who knows when. I felt very daring as my husband and I visited his sister a few days ago. She lives in a small town that is quite isolated & she hasn't been taking any risks. It was great to just be somewhere else. Also my adult daughter visited us last week & my son is coming this week. We have invitations to get together with a couple different friends and I am ok with it if we stay outside. I realized that since March I have worn only one pair of tennis shoes & one pair of sandals, and for short times, only when I go on an errand or walk outside (too hot for that the last week anyway).
My area of Wisconsin was doing well until bars opened. Most of the new cases are people under 35 and they have been at bars, restaurants, or large gatherings. We have a county-wide mask order starting Monday for enclosed places, even though we will never get a state-wide one. Most people in town here have been wearing them, but not everyone, even inside stores that theoretically require them.
Barbara M wrote: "Karin wrote: "I drove by a demonstration against egregious educational cutbacks and everyone there was wearing a mask. I gave them a thumbs up as I drove around two sides of the rotatry (Massachuse..."Actually, I think it has to do with the fact that so much money has gone into the payments made to alleviate financial strains from the coronavirus quarantines, etc. Every state that meets certain requirements gets federal money toward education. This is the $1200 for single people or $2400 for couples or families that went to people who file taxes who qualify by income. I am not sure how much money the state on its own has lost due to coronavirus. My husband is the one glued to political commentary shows, not me.
Karin wrote: "I am not sure how much money the state on its own has lost due to coronavirus. ..."While I don't know the figures I do know that most states have a personal income tax ... no (or reduced) income = no (reduced) tax. There there are the various sales taxes. The few states with no personal income tax have (typically) higher sales taxes. Again, retail stores and restaurants mostly closed, so no sales = no tax revenue.
The hits on tax-supported services will be severe, I think.
Things are "opening up" here in the US. Every state in the US is different, but in general I think that our restrictions are less than yours. Restaurants are only allowed 50% capacity. The employees at all salons have to wear masks at all time (since they can't social distance really). Some cities or states are requiring masks, some are not. Every retail store basically has to decide how they are handling it. And seems like we have a growing anti-mask group in the US. - along with rising numbers of COVID cases in many southern states.
In sum, I agree. It was all easier when we were under quarantine. Many people act like life here is "back to normal" - but it's not. The virus is still there. My brother (who is in Iowa - I'm in MInnesota) is getting tested because he rode in a car for FIVE hours with someone who later tested positive. I've got my fingers crossed for both my brother and your boyfriend.