BotM Nov. "Being Mortal" Atul Gawande

[Cheryl]

Being Mortal: Medicine and What Matters in the End by Atul Gawande is our non-fiction book. Apparently Gawande is a doctor and advocate for better care for the increasing numbers of the aged. I watched my grandmother live too long in a nursing home and am starting to get older myself, so I'm very interested in this.

We'll be discussing it on Saturday, November 23, at 2 pm, the week *before* Thanksgiving weekend.

Remember that current group reads are available at the library now and you can borrow them for the full term w/out worries about renewals; just make sure your staff member confirms the due date before you leave.

[Cheryl]

I'm not going to have time or energy to read this before the meeting. I did try awhile ago, so here's my review for that DNF attempt.

Read the first chapter, skimmed bits towards the end. My parents, husband, sons, and I have all spent time thinking & talking about these issues. None of us are frightened of death, but only of misery. We'd take a Kevorkian w/out a qualm if the doctors would admit that their suggestions would only *possibly* *prolong* life, rather than have a high likelihood of *improving* the quality of our last months (?). So, maybe I'll read this again if one of us gets to the point where we don't feel as if we're getting straight answers from the doc, or the kids aren't respectful. But for now, the book goes back to the library.

For me, if I can read, and have valued conversations,I don't care if I have to wear diapers, use a wheelchair, or endure pain. Ymmv. Gawande's point is that *you* decide now what you want, and don't want, when there are options about the end-of-life, when death is looming. Living wills are apparently not enough.

[Cheryl]

We had a pretty good discussion. Most ppl had actually read both books. We, as a group, came to the consensus that we're not keen on suicide for feelings of despair, but definitely feel that there's too much intervention at the end of life. And doctors need to be better trained. And we all need to fill out the forms that the hospital should be giving us very carefully.

One example from the book was noted... a certain person didn't care so much about whether they were physically incapacitated, but wanted to live so long as they had a sense of humor good enough to appreciate television comedies.

Another thing to think about is how much of a burden is a person in end stages being on the family... for a few more weeks of pain, should enormous debts be racked up? (for example)

But, yeah, despair and depression. they need to be better treated, so healthy people don't make the final decision, leaving those who love them behind to carry on.