AUGUST 2019 - MICROSTORY CONTEST (CRITIQUES ONLY)

[Jon]

Critiques for August.

[Paula]

Powerful, very well written, and serious story, Jot, (although here and there an image could be clearer). Imo, the best you've done.

[Jot]

Wow, Paula. I am grateful. I'll have to look for those less than clear parts to see if I can make it better.

[Jot]

Seems to be good to step away from a story a couple/few days and then reread it. Think I found the issues you were talking about Paula. Thanks again.

[Paula]

I'm sure you've found the important issues, Jot---'cause those are always the ones the author finds on going back to edit his/her work--imo.

[Paula]

Justin--elegantly, uh, executed!
Seriously, very nice.
Although, on a more serious note, I'm not sure how envy and the like could, in actuality, lead to such war, even though that view gets thrown around by some politicians a lot. It's the weak point in an otherwise tight, elegant plotting.

[Paula]

Andy--good to read one of your stories again. As usual, one can trust in their solid realisms and subtleties. In particular, "the Democrats took Florida by 586 votes after Nixon/ Agnew lost their appeal to the Warren Court (6-3)"; the discussion with McNamara, otoh, was a bit too frighteningly reminiscent of Ellsberg's accounts of meetings with McNamara (in The Doomsday Machine).
Excellent story.

[Justin]

Paula wrote: "Justin--elegantly, uh, executed!
Seriously, very nice.
Although, on a more serious note, I'm not sure how envy and the like could, in actuality, lead to such war, even though that view gets throw..."

Thank you Paula! I sincerely appreciate it!