What would you have done?

[Natalia]

Salma wrote: "I was thinking about this a lot recently and I wanted to know what would you have done if you had a disabled child.

There are two instances:
1. Let's say you found out before the first trimester...."


Well, these decisions are never easy to decide, because we can say many things, but never know for sure until we are mothers directly and tell us that our baby comes with a problem from now.

In the case of this book, we can review from many perspectives. How cruel society can be a little be different, either a physical disability or Down Syndrome, like Phoebe. As you yourself said, they didn't ask to be born so small, they are the real victims of these emotional conflicts that parents attribute. And I certainly don't think all mothers are emotionally prepared for a long road that leads to raising a baby with certain abilities or limitancias. I think in this story, I know that Caroline is not the biological mother of Phoebe, but showed that need not have the same blood for raising a daughter and she did much better than Nora.

I don't think it's racism or cruelty decide you want to abort if they tell you that your baby is in trouble. That's the belief of each as a person, I don't know if I would. Sometimes I would think so, now people are very bad and cruel, I wouldn't want a world for my baby. And I know from experience.

[Natalia]

Salma wrote: "Thanks for your reply. I see what you're saying and you are 100% right that you never understand what someone is going through until its you. However, it is racism and let me explain why.

You're ..."


I didn't say that we got rid of the black or the disabled, but that decision is for each person individually. To some extent support abortion, but I'm not abort a baby for that reason. I just said that the world can be cruel, but I'm not racist or anything.

[Natalia]

Salma wrote: "Oh no ofcourse I know. I was just using that as an example to show you that it is Racism. If you abort your child on the basis of something that is out of their control (gender, race, disability, e..."


Ok, don't worry :)
And I understand what are you saying, I live the discrimination everyday.

[Thomas]

As the father of a child with Down syndrome I can tell you that I would not abort my child or give him up for adoption. Abortion of those with disabilities is eugenics. I would not tell a woman what she could or could not do with her pregnancy but I would consider it wrong.

[Carrie]

I don't have children so, I really can't say honestly. I'd like to think I would keep the child.

[Felgona]

If I knew before birth, then I'd have definitely aborted without a second thought. Taking care of a child with Down's Syndrome seems like a tiring and relentless challenge. Selfish as it sounds, I know for sure that I wouldn't have the strength to not only take care of the child, but also watch their personal struggle. In a case where I'd only find out after birth, I can't really say what my decision would be.

[Kirk]

I'm male, but I would counsel my wife to abort any child with a serious birth defect or genetic problem.

[inaword]

Has anyone factored in the time period while making their hypothetical decisions? Weren't Phoebe and Paul born in the 60s or something?

Or are you asking what we would do now in the present time?

[inaword]

Salma wrote: "Oh no ofcourse I know. I was just using that as an example to show you that it is Racism. If you abort your child on the basis of something that is out of their control (gender, race, disability, e..."

Racism deals primarily with race, it's not a catch-all term for any kind of discrimination. Discrimination based on sex and gender is sexism, and discrimination based on disabilities is ableism.