I have completely refigured my first four chapters. Now I need to see if it still makes sense. The MS is undergoing a professional edit and is in pretty good shape, but I need feedback on pace, flow, consistency, and is it intriguing. There are racial overtones, but not in a preachy way. And it is humorous. Here's what Angels Without Halos is all about:
In a perfect world, love is blind and justice is colorblind. Yvette Hightower does not live in a perfect world.
As a devoted wife, Yvette supports her husband in all he does—and Isaiah Hightower does a lot. He is the principal of Hilton Head high school, a leader of the community, a warrior against racial injustices, and a deacon in his local church.
He is also a member of Dark Alleys nightclub: a place where he does not have to maintain his public image of purity. Funny thing, he never mentioned his membership there to his wife.
But when Isiah enlists the help of a high-profile white athlete to help raise money for his foundation, Yvette turns furious—until she witnesses Isaiah's greatest sin—and she is the only one who can save him.
All it will take is one little lie to preserve his years of good work and protect his iconic legacy. ***
I will offer feedback on your opening chapters of about the same length in return.
In a perfect world, love is blind and justice is colorblind.
Yvette Hightower does not live in a perfect world.
As a devoted wife, Yvette supports her husband in all he does—and Isaiah Hightower does a lot. He is the principal of Hilton Head high school, a leader of the community, a warrior against racial injustices, and a deacon in his local church.
He is also a member of Dark Alleys nightclub: a place where he does not have to maintain his public image of purity. Funny thing, he never mentioned his membership there to his wife.
But when Isiah enlists the help of a high-profile white athlete to help raise money for his foundation, Yvette turns furious—until she witnesses Isaiah's greatest sin—and she is the only one who can save him.
All it will take is one little lie to preserve his years of good work and protect his iconic legacy.
***
I will offer feedback on your opening chapters of about the same length in return.