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trying to feel like me again
message 2451:
by
Erin
(new)
Mar 19, 2018 07:33PM
I've developed an addiction for a lot of things it seems
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I act as if perfection is quantity but it's always been quality
Listening to others buy never the advice thry give
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "It'd be fu..."Yeah, that makes sense.
Ignore the part that's striked out. I know it's not that easy
Instead of dying from drowning or any other suicidal ways I'm going to die from all this caffeine and lack of sleep and junk food
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wr..."I'm so sorry about not responding sooner! Wow it's like your two friends just summed me up because that's literally how I feel about suicide and about self harm but then I'm also empathetic af so...idk. Tell them about how you know it's selfish and cowardly and stupid and about how you wish that you didn't do it but you keep finding yourself doing them, but make sure that you make notice that you know that you're in control of your actions. I don't know exactly what you should say but if you decide to tell them just be open and honest.
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Instead of dying from drowning or any other suicidal ways I'm going to die from all this caffeine and lack of sleep and junk food"Oh my gosh same."
I'm still not sure which form of dying would be better.
I really need to stop talking. I'm terrible.
Go to sleep. Escape reality. Maybe you'll dream or maybe you won't or maybe you will and you just won't remember it. Shut down the voices in your head. Let your stresses leave you alone for just awhile. Stop writing. Stop writing. Didn't I just say to stop? Why don't you ever listen. This is why you hate yourself. Oh, don't you dare go form a list. I said don't. I said-
I swallowed my sleep medicine (whoo!) but I didn't feel like sleeping so I kept writing
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "[spoilers removed]"Erin wrote: "Just kidding, I don't want to die"
Erin wrote: "Will somebody please kill me?"
*hugs* No dying."
*hugs back* shush. nobody mentioned dying.
Lillian wrote: "Oh, and I told my friends."Oh yeah, I just read. :/ How are you feeling about what you told them?
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "[spoilers removed]"Erin wrote: "Just kidding, I don't want to die"
Erin wrote: "Will somebody please kill me?"
*hugs* No dying."
*hugs back* shush. n..."
*hugs tightly* murders disagree. well half of them anyways.
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Oh, and I told my friends."Oh yeah, I just read. :/ How are you feeling about what you told them?"
I don't like what I had to tell them but I don't think they would ...".
I'm glad that you told them. I'm sorry that one of them doesn't understand but at least one was able to take it okay.
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "[spoilers removed]"Erin wrote: "Just kidding, I don't want to die"
Erin wrote: "Will somebody please kill me?"
*hugs* No ..."
I wouldn't dream of dying.
More like one hour and thirty five minutes
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Oh, and I told my friends."Oh yeah, I just read. :/ How are you feeling about what you told them?"
I don't like what I had to tell them ..."
I'm sorry if I made it seem like I was glad that you had to tell them, I just meant that I was glad that you had told someone who was around you more. Yeah, I got that :/ I get how she feels.
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Or, well, sleep xD"Erin wrote: "Seriously, I don't dream."
Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "[spoilers removed]"
E..."
wow, we really need to start taking care of ourselves.
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Oh, and I told my friends."Oh yeah, I just read. :/ How are you feeling about what you told them?"
I don't ..."
Good, that's a relief. I just thought I might've worded it wrong since I tend to do that a lot.
Yeah I'm sorry
Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Erin wrote: "Lillian wrote: "Oh, and I told my friends."Oh yeah, I just read. :/ How are you feeling about w..."
I know, I just- I don't know *hugs back*
it's personal
Books mentioned in this topic
30 Things I Love About Myself (other topics)Challenger Deep (other topics)
Throes (other topics)
P.S. I Still Love You (other topics)
Delirium (other topics)
