trying to feel like me again Showing 2,151-2,200 of 14,783

[Erin]

Even tomorrow is my future. I'll make it until tomorrow

[Erin]

I CAN'T ACCEPT THAT SHE DOESN'T CARE

[Erin]

They're lying

[Erin]

They must be

[Erin]

Or if she said it they made her

[Erin]

They made her want to say it

[Erin]

Told her lies or something

[Erin]

I wish she'd break the rules

[Erin]

She always did

[Erin]

I wish she'd remember Goodreads and me and that'd she'd come here

[Erin]

I miss her

[Erin]

I'm tired of missing her

[Erin]

He called her leaving me small

[Erin]

I think my entire existence is small.

[Erin]

Every would tell me I was wrong but they're lying if that's true.

[Erin]

I can't keep doing this.

[Erin]

I'm going to die at this rate with all these thoughts and missing people and missing myself

[Erin]

I want to cut off my arms

[Erin]

Would that cause me to bleed

[Erin]

Will losing that much blood kill me

[Erin]

That's the worst way for me to die

[Erin]

I write

[Erin]

And that'd be taken from me

[Erin]

I never thought about that before

[Erin]

I can't help but wonder how much it hurts

[Erin]

I don't want to know

[Erin]

I shouldn't want to know

[Erin]

I would never

[Erin]

I'm sorry

[Erin]

I'm just feeling really really down right now

[Erin]

I want to leave again

[Erin]

This house feels like it's trying to suffocate me

[Erin]

Like the walls are going to cave in

[Erin]

I can't breathe

[Erin]

I have homework and I can't focus

[Erin]

I need to focus

[Erin]

Looks like anxiety didn't win.

[Erin]

Instead it was Depression

[Erin]

Ugh my body aches so badly

[Erin]

My head won't shut up

[Erin]

I want to leave so badly

[Erin]

I need to stop with all this negativity

[Erin]

She asked me if my home felt safe. I told her sometimes.

[Erin]

What I didn't say: I am the number one reason I don't feel safe

[Erin]

My mind isn't safe

[Erin]

I don't want my mom to know

[Erin]

She can't know

[Erin]

Hospital. Straight jacket.

[Erin]

It was just a joke. I should let it go.

[Erin]

I can't let it go. I'm so scared.