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Your weirdest main character profession?
In my YA books, most of my MCs are street kids, so they're just doing whatever they can to survive. Usually on the wrong side of the law, such as shoplifting, jacking cars, prostitution, drug dealing, etc. One is a street busker playing the shell game and similar. One draws caricatures. One returns bottles. Adults... I have one who designs meal plans for prisoners, airplane passengers, etc. One who bakes for gluten-free or other special diets. One is a virtual assistant and also creates artwork from recycled materials. I have one who is a dog catcher and youth boxing coach. Another is a Department of Health vector diseases expert. Some police officers and private investigators.
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This isn't a story I've written just yet, but I have one story idea in which a man who, for various reasons, must take up the mantle of royal wizard, except he doesn't know magic and also refuses to use it. But if he doesn't take up said mantle, bad things will happen so he has to bluff his way along. I really need to write that story one of these days.
My ongoing series is about the 7 Deadly Sins, so although that's not exactly whacky, no one else has ever or will ever be able to do their jobs. This is a fun question, now I'm going to have to consider applying it to a future story. Thanks for the inspiration! :)
I was going to resign myself to having characters with typical jobs, even typical fantasy and sci-fi jobs,but then I realized Vampire Outreach volunteer is kind of unusual.
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Many of my MCs are unemployed. They still have professions of a sort, if you squint really hard, like "sacrifice", "unwitting entree", and "accidental dragonslayer".
Many people have told me that I have a weird profession for a job. I never looked at being a Cemetery worker as weird until I began writing about it and my friends said that my job is very unconventional and to keep writing. In the end I let the reader decide.
Probably my own character in mermaid in the kitchen (non fiction memoir type thing) lol... Can't get more strange than a rock and roll professional psychic I don't think ;-)
Neat replies so far!Melissa wrote: "This isn't a story I've written just yet, but I have one story idea in which a man who, for various reasons, must take up the mantle of royal wizard, except he doesn't know magic and also refuses t..."
Melissa, this was one thing I was thinking about, but didn't bring up: How relative the term "weird" can be, after all. I take it your potential story is defined as fantasy. Even though it sounds peculiar, how weird would you say that the profession is, with the context in mind? Is it a Harry Potter-style muggle situation, or is the character actively aware from the beginning that there is magic?
Riley wrote: "I have a professional drug addict in everyone dies at the end, does that count?"
Interesting, but... how, though? If we exclude being a fine wine or liquor connoisseur with a potential addiction, how would one get paid for being addicted to drugs?
I guess the weirdest character occupation I have was an undertaker. He was an odd duck, to say the least.Another of my main characters is kind of a psychological healer of sorts, so that might qualify.
Lukas wrote: "Neat replies so far!Melissa wrote: "This isn't a story I've written just yet, but I have one story idea in which a man who, for various reasons, must take up the mantle of royal wizard, except he..."
For this story wizardry is normal. The weird part is being a wizard who doesn't use magic and has so to somehow fake it.
Sarah wrote: "Momtrepreneur - a Wonder Woman
:-)"
I love that word!
:-)"
I love that word!
Sarah, yes, momtreprenuer...great word and also very fitting for women. My character Lee in the spy romance is a secret agent, jack of all trades and he even went undercover as an acupuncturist. Not so much that it is weird, but a little different.
Got you all beat. My characters include a pirate submarine captain and president of a prostitutes union. Bwahahaha!
Does gemologist/jeweller turned spy count as unusual?
My main character calls himself a Ghost Whore. He sleeps with ghosts to get there ecto-plasm (which is basically liquid luck). This supports his career as a professional Gambler. The book is NOT an erotica-ha.
Wow Andrew that's strange and certainly different!
My upcoming book has one of my main characters and villians as a wax curator and sculptor.
Quite an interesting cast of characters here. Ah the joy of creation! :) Not too original here but my most unusual is the MC in my prequel. He is a spy (Quite common, I know) who infiltrated a ship's crew by pretending to be a 'cleaner', which includes cleaning messes of course but also grinding corpses to feed the prisoners.
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*Cracks knuckles*
Admit it, you were waiting for me to get here!
- Sexual Deviant
- 3D Graphics & Animation Assistant to Sexual Deviant
- Professional Video Game Speedrunner / YouTube Celebrity / Famous just for being themselves
- Rockstar - Drummer / Idiot
- Rockstar - Singer / Tantric Sexpert
- Rockstar - Guitarist / Host of Reality TV Show about House Flipping with the help of orphans.
- Professional Cosplayer / Blacksmith that makes movie props
- Jewellery Designer that has an Etsy Site
- Librarian who sneaks away from real job to be a virtual librarian
- Student - Popping Math Major
- Student - Beekeeping Major
- Student - Cooking Major & Dance Minor
- Student - Plot Development of story they are in Major
- Owner of Sex Store / Fan-Fiction Writer / Tournament Level Pinball Player
- Event Organizer for Entertainment Expo
- Professional B*tch (I really do have that listed)
- Barista
Those are just their real jobs. I could go into virtual jobs like Exhibitionist Tractor Racing Lesbian or arcade owning unicorn, if I wanted to get really weird.
5 points for anyone who can tell me who was the Barista! :D
I don't know if this counts or not, but I once wrote a song in which the protagonist was a veteran from the Vietnam war who was tatooed with the names of all of his fallen fellow soldiers all over his body and who had flashbacks as he walked the streets armed with a pistol and a knife.
I think I am kinda weird and I am the main character in my recently published travel book. - I used to work in finance, earned my CPA and MBA and worked in places as diverse as Australia to Nigeria. Then I quit my office job and now I write about my travels.
- I love to travel but dislike tourists (its those hidden gems I seek)
An accountant turned writer - its still too early to determine if I can "bring home the bacon" as originally asked in this post!
All previous posters seem to have me beat, nonetheless here goes.The main character of my book is a genetically engineered supersoldier/commando/intelligence agent. That would normally be considered unusual . . . but is pretty much par for the course in the sci-fi genre.
If we're including secondary characters, does cybernetically-modified spymistress count?
Profession doesn't play a big roll in my stories. But I do have one book in progress where the MC is a police investigator, one of the few remaining officers in the Cybercorps. That division is given over to policing legacy computer systems, both human and alien. I.e. obsolete computer and communication networks which are too old to transition to newer platforms but which are (though sometimes almost forgotten) still marginally operational and used largely in the underground, semi-legal or outright criminal economy (because all legal computation and communication is run through an alien FTL system that is totally transparent and no communications or transmissions are hidden from anyone else on the system--it's not just illegal but impossible to hide anything on the system).His official uniform is a brown corduroy suit with a fluffy ruffled white shirt, wide tie in bright colors, an orange clown wig and red ball nose, and face done up in full clown makeup. Because "it scares the willies out of the aliens."
His fellow police officers consider him a throwback to some past time. His dress uniform hopelessly passé and ultra conservative.
Wow, all the unusual MCs in here. Mine are pretty mundane. A geologist whose work is being used to find oil,
An ecologist who turns to nature photography to get a job. She's also and expert tracker.
An assistant to a company branch manager who is also a ballerina.
A pre-law student who works in a strip joint as a waitress,
A model who decided to retire and travel,
A skip tracer,
A private eye,
A translator who ends up a powerful shaman/druid mix tapped to save her people.
A homeless girl who finds her place singing with a band who is actually an angel.
A financial consultant
A widow who is financially independent and is living her dream of traveling.
Right now the book I'm writing as I stated my villians job is a wax curator and sculptor.However the protagonist and other characters are college students but I could give them weird occupations lol.
My characters are typically in law enforcement. I’m not sure any of mine have had weird jobs, more like typical jobs like: a secretary, owns a landscaping business, a hairstylist....oh, I just thought of a unique job. One of my characters makes crafts and sells them online.
John wrote: "All previous posters seem to have me beat, nonetheless here goes.The main character of my book is a genetically engineered supersoldier/commando/intelligence agent. That would normally be conside..."
I made up the rules, but if people feel like altering the rules is a good idea, then it's most likely a good idea!
About your character, it makes me think of David Mitchell's book Cloud Atlas, in the more futuristic part, when they have androids/robots in the university research area. Have you read it? If not, specifically that part of the book might be an interesting source of inspiration!
Lukas wrote: "John wrote: "All previous posters seem to have me beat, nonetheless here goes.The main character of my book is a genetically engineered supersoldier/commando/intelligence agent. That would normal..."
I'll check it out. Thanks!
I had a character whose job was to do an EVA when the 'human waste management' systems on a starship malfunctioned and prevented the storage tanks being pumped out to a waste hauler. Mind you he was a spy on the side.
Philosophy major in college.Wannabe dot-com startup VP.
One of the characters in the novel I'm currently working on is the foremost expert on butterflies and moths and all things related; behind closed doors, it is also whispered that she is highly knowledgeable in the Forbidden Sciences.You: what are the Forbid-
Me: We don't talk about it.
One of my favorite charaters owned a rickshaw and gave tours.
This probably falls into the category of 'spoiler alert', but one of my characters worked for a kidnap agency, enacting wealthy people's fantasies...
Watcher - an elinefae in Love Bites :) He's like a patrol officer, I guess.
Or there's a forensic pathologist in my WIP.
Okay, so magically enslaved prisoner isn't exactly a profession but the character does get free room and board within a pocket dimension inside an amulet. And the one now in possession of that amulet is a librarian about to become a wizard cop.
This is in the book I'm writing now:1. A woman who runs a Pet-Adoption clinic. This sounds fairly reasonable until you read it and realize that men are the pets being adopted.... They're treated exactly like dogs, and sex with them is prohibited and deemed 'bestiality'.
a former EMT and soldier who is living on an outpost in a post-apocalyptic Australia
This is really a great wacky list of profession ideas. Which is good, because I haven't found a profession for my arrogant charismatic murder victim (feel free to shoot any ideas my way.) I just sort of assumed he'd be in business since he's a smooth-talker. I DO have a Beauty and the Beast retelling where there's a woman that's a matchmaker because she has the ability to tell who could be happy together.
Jenna wrote: "This is really a great wacky list of profession ideas. Which is good, because I haven't found a profession for my arrogant charismatic murder victim (feel free to shoot any ideas my way.) I just so..."Arrogant and charismatic, hmm. How about an estate agent, a TV presenter or a telephone salesman?
Jenna wrote: "This is really a great wacky list of profession ideas. Which is good, because I haven't found a profession for my arrogant charismatic murder victim (feel free to shoot any ideas my way.) I just so..."How about focusing on a hobby instead? The victim could be the lead actor in a community play who has let the limited prestige go to his/her head.
Jenna wrote: "This is really a great wacky list of profession ideas. Which is good, because I haven't found a profession for my arrogant charismatic murder victim (feel free to shoot any ideas my way.) I just so..."When I read that, my first thought was car salesman. It sounds trite but I would love to see at least three gone from the face of the earth. (They aren't my favorite people) They are arrogant and charismatic and make great murder victims.
B.A. - haha - thank you, that made me laugh. When I bought my first car, I had a salesman neatly use circular logic to prove I had promised to buy a particular car. Thank heavens I had brought my dad with me. Also - pretty sure they have the place wired to hear what your 'top dollar' would be....ugh.Petra and Phillip - great ideas! I need him to be respectable, even a little higher-class, because it turns out he's abusive, but I don't want people to immediately pick up on that. Real estate though....that might be a hobby he could have on the side, and might work in this instance.
As the title says: if you've ever gone down the bizarre path, what is the weirdest profession you've ever given your main character?
I surely haven't read as many books as many others here, but I've read enough for it to hit me that I barely know any main characters who've had a whacky profession. The closest I can think of must be the old man in Hemingway's The Old Man and the Sea, as a failed fisherman. But that's not "whacky" in the sense that I'm thinking of.
The cookie murder books by Joanne Fluke is another good example. While I personally didn't enjoy the two initial books that I've read so far, the main character - besides solving murder mysteries - bakes cookies and cakes in her petite boutique. That's quite unique.
Personally, I'm currently trying to write a story where the main character works as a hot dog salesman, standing around with one of those typical New York style (even though the story takes place in London) hot dog carts.
So, have anyone else had any crazy ideas as to what their main character is doing to bring home the bacon? If not, have you found any interesting ones in books you've read?