it's personal discussion
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chin up and we'll drown a little slower;
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1. selfie
nope you guys have already seen me lol
2. what would you name your future kids?
zayne, dean, eve
3. do you miss anyone?
yes
4. what are you looking forward to?
sleeping tonight
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?
yes <3
6. is it hard for you to get over someone?
nope, not at all
7. what was your life like last year?
rough. very rough. 2018 was probs one of my worst years.
8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?
yes!
9. who did you last see in person?
i'm in a room with 4 other people, so i guess them?
10. are you good at hiding your feelings?
nope, im an open book
11. are you listening to music right now?
nope
12. what is something you want right now?
pasta!
13. how do you feel right now?
tired and hungry
14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?
uh MH hugged me earlier
15. personality description
funny, dry, dark, snarky, cocky
16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?
yes!
17. opinion on insecurities.
they're perfectly fine to have
18. do you miss how things were a year ago?
yeah, i do. april of 2018 was my last sense of normalcy.
19. have you ever been to New York?
i haven't.
20. what is your favourite song at the moment?
uh, black hole sun by soundgarden
21. age and birthday?
18, june 17
22. description of crush.
5 pounds, white hair, blue eyes, cute pink nose, whiskers... jk guys im describing my cats whom i love very much
23. fear(s)
the dark, water, losing people i love
24. height
5 feet
25. role model
james w. loewen
26. idol(s)
i don't really have any??
27. things i hate
chewing, feet, bad smells, pain, blood, being sick
28. i’ll love you if…
you make me pasta <3
29. favourite film(s)
shawshank, se7en
30. favourite tv show(s)
lost, FNL, SPN
31. 3 random facts
luffas are a plant, luffas are a member of the cucumber family, synthetic luffas became popular in american during WWII when the luffa trade with japan stopped.
32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?
they're pretty much all NB lol
33. something you want to learn
how to grow luffas
34. most embarrassing moment
all of them. seriously. but probably a wrong text sent to the wrong groupchat.
35. favourite subject
science
36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?
buy a house up north, be rich, help others.
37. favourite actor/actress
morgan freeman
38. favourite comedian(s)
david sedaris
39. favourite sport(s)
football, baseball
40. favourite memory
disney!!
41. relationship status
single
42. favourite book(s)
the HP series, TID series
43. favourite song ever
open arms, journey
44. age you get mistaken for
TWELVE
45. how you found out about your idol
i don't have an idol
46. what my last text message says
"lmaooo rip him"
47. turn ons
see above survey
48. turn offs
see above survey
49. where i want to be right now
on a beach in the sun
50. favourite picture of your idol
stop
51. starsign
gemini
52. something i’m talented at
speed reading
53. 5 things that make me happy
sunshine, crispy leaves, soap cutting videos, misha, milo
54. something thats worrying me at the moment
my exam tomorrow
55. tumblr friends
nope
56. favourite food(s)
pasta, lime corn
57. favourite animal(s)
cat, pig
58. description of my best friend
the cutest lil cinnabun with dark hair and blue eyes and a great music taste.
1. selfie
nope you guys have already seen me lol
2. what would you name your future kids?
zayne, dean, eve
3. do you miss anyone?
yes
4. what are you looking forward to?
sleeping tonight
5. is there anyone who can always make you smile?
yes <3
6. is it hard for you to get over someone?
nope, not at all
7. what was your life like last year?
rough. very rough. 2018 was probs one of my worst years.
8. have you ever cried because you were so annoyed?
yes!
9. who did you last see in person?
i'm in a room with 4 other people, so i guess them?
10. are you good at hiding your feelings?
nope, im an open book
11. are you listening to music right now?
nope
12. what is something you want right now?
pasta!
13. how do you feel right now?
tired and hungry
14. when was the last time someone of the opposite sex hugged you?
uh MH hugged me earlier
15. personality description
funny, dry, dark, snarky, cocky
16. have you ever wanted to tell someone something but you didn’t?
yes!
17. opinion on insecurities.
they're perfectly fine to have
18. do you miss how things were a year ago?
yeah, i do. april of 2018 was my last sense of normalcy.
19. have you ever been to New York?
i haven't.
20. what is your favourite song at the moment?
uh, black hole sun by soundgarden
21. age and birthday?
18, june 17
22. description of crush.
5 pounds, white hair, blue eyes, cute pink nose, whiskers... jk guys im describing my cats whom i love very much
23. fear(s)
the dark, water, losing people i love
24. height
5 feet
25. role model
james w. loewen
26. idol(s)
i don't really have any??
27. things i hate
chewing, feet, bad smells, pain, blood, being sick
28. i’ll love you if…
you make me pasta <3
29. favourite film(s)
shawshank, se7en
30. favourite tv show(s)
lost, FNL, SPN
31. 3 random facts
luffas are a plant, luffas are a member of the cucumber family, synthetic luffas became popular in american during WWII when the luffa trade with japan stopped.
32. are your friends mainly girls or guys?
they're pretty much all NB lol
33. something you want to learn
how to grow luffas
34. most embarrassing moment
all of them. seriously. but probably a wrong text sent to the wrong groupchat.
35. favourite subject
science
36. 3 dreams you want to fulfill?
buy a house up north, be rich, help others.
37. favourite actor/actress
morgan freeman
38. favourite comedian(s)
david sedaris
39. favourite sport(s)
football, baseball
40. favourite memory
disney!!
41. relationship status
single
42. favourite book(s)
the HP series, TID series
43. favourite song ever
open arms, journey
44. age you get mistaken for
TWELVE
45. how you found out about your idol
i don't have an idol
46. what my last text message says
"lmaooo rip him"
47. turn ons
see above survey
48. turn offs
see above survey
49. where i want to be right now
on a beach in the sun
50. favourite picture of your idol
stop
51. starsign
gemini
52. something i’m talented at
speed reading
53. 5 things that make me happy
sunshine, crispy leaves, soap cutting videos, misha, milo
54. something thats worrying me at the moment
my exam tomorrow
55. tumblr friends
nope
56. favourite food(s)
pasta, lime corn
57. favourite animal(s)
cat, pig
58. description of my best friend
the cutest lil cinnabun with dark hair and blue eyes and a great music taste.
☀️🌙✨ tarot questions ✨🌙☀️
the fool: do you have any nicknames?
jay, jayse, jaysie, ollie, jayjay, bun
the magician: have you ever written a poem or song about somebody else?
yes :)) during my heartbroken emo phase
the high priestess: what is your dream date?
milkshakes, cheese fries, long drives, parking on top of a parking garage and watching the stars.
the empress: do you think you will ever get married?
yeah, eventually.
the emperor: what are some names that you like?
misha, milo (haha), but seriously, uhh zayne, ella, emma, lucy
the hierophant: do you believe in ghosts?
i do not
the lovers: do you have a crush?
also do not
the chariot: thoughts on astrology?
kind of a load of crap imho but i mean, if you believe in it then yay!
strength: what is your dream occupation?
a professor of some sort
the hermit: what is your favorite soda pop?
mountain dew baja blast or faygo rock n rye
wheel of fortune: first three songs that come on shuffle?
backseat serenade - atl
mi gna -super sako
brazil- declan mckenna
justice: favorite color of rose?
red!
the hanged man: favorite movie soundtrack?
guardians of the galaxy
death: what are three things you want to do before you die?
learn another language, travel across europe and asia, and see steve perry live
temperance: can you describe a strange dream you’ve had?
one time i dreamed that my cousin's husband's brother died and left behind two twin girls, then the next day i found out that his wife is actually having twins.
the devil: do you enjoy thunderstorms?
sometimes
the tower: favorite colors to wear?
maroon, navy
the star: have you ever seen a psychic?
once, yes. it was bullshit lol she had no clue what she was talking about, but that's what i get for a $5 reading
the moon: have you ever written a love letter?
i have written many, you can prolly find some if you go back a couple hundred pages on here
the sun: do you believe in magic?
everyday magic, yes
judgement: do you enjoy school?
i enjoy learning, yes, but not always school
the world: do you like waking up early?
i don't but i wish i did
the fool: do you have any nicknames?
jay, jayse, jaysie, ollie, jayjay, bun
the magician: have you ever written a poem or song about somebody else?
yes :)) during my heartbroken emo phase
the high priestess: what is your dream date?
milkshakes, cheese fries, long drives, parking on top of a parking garage and watching the stars.
the empress: do you think you will ever get married?
yeah, eventually.
the emperor: what are some names that you like?
misha, milo (haha), but seriously, uhh zayne, ella, emma, lucy
the hierophant: do you believe in ghosts?
i do not
the lovers: do you have a crush?
also do not
the chariot: thoughts on astrology?
kind of a load of crap imho but i mean, if you believe in it then yay!
strength: what is your dream occupation?
a professor of some sort
the hermit: what is your favorite soda pop?
mountain dew baja blast or faygo rock n rye
wheel of fortune: first three songs that come on shuffle?
backseat serenade - atl
mi gna -super sako
brazil- declan mckenna
justice: favorite color of rose?
red!
the hanged man: favorite movie soundtrack?
guardians of the galaxy
death: what are three things you want to do before you die?
learn another language, travel across europe and asia, and see steve perry live
temperance: can you describe a strange dream you’ve had?
one time i dreamed that my cousin's husband's brother died and left behind two twin girls, then the next day i found out that his wife is actually having twins.
the devil: do you enjoy thunderstorms?
sometimes
the tower: favorite colors to wear?
maroon, navy
the star: have you ever seen a psychic?
once, yes. it was bullshit lol she had no clue what she was talking about, but that's what i get for a $5 reading
the moon: have you ever written a love letter?
i have written many, you can prolly find some if you go back a couple hundred pages on here
the sun: do you believe in magic?
everyday magic, yes
judgement: do you enjoy school?
i enjoy learning, yes, but not always school
the world: do you like waking up early?
i don't but i wish i did
i need to spring clean my room but i also didn’t finish cleaning it the first time so there’s still shit everywhere
‘murmur’ sounds like a cute nickname for something bad. like when people call Lucifer ‘Luci’ but they call murder ‘murmur’
i have to go get my cholesterol checked again and if it hasn’t improved i’m gonna be put on medication haha rip me i hate taking pills
adding lipitor to my lineup of anti depressants means more pills and cjxxogxoxoci i hate having to take medicine like that
i guess i’m just. really. in a bad place right now. my anxiety was already high bc i got a lecture from a family member about how i’m wasting my life and how switching my major means that i’m a quitter and that my degree will get me nowhere in life, so i already felt like i wanted to barf. then the urges to cut started and then i got a text from someone i haven’t talked to in a while basically accusing me of something that is totally not true so i tried to explain it to him and he sent me a cat picture and i was like aw kitty but now i’m just back to laying in my bed trying not to move anything but my fingers as i type this bc honestly i’m so fucking scared of myself and also i am a freaking mess and I don’t know who to tel
if i tell anyone IRL i’ll be sent to the ER and they’ll admit me so fucking fast and i don’t ducking want that, no one has time for my shit right now
i can’t even seem to cry it out right now. i’m just kind of numb and shaking and angry and upset.
i also feel like i’m ranting on here because i genuinely just feel like i don’t really want to bother one particular person with my shit. so i’m just shouting into the void of the internet.
if i’m only partially honest she’ll probably just increase my prozac again which isn’t good because...
1) i don’t want to be more dependent on meds
2) having a higher dose means it’s harder for me to get off of it
3) my dad doesn’t want me on any more meds because he thinks i’m magically cured of depression even though i went through so much shit this past year (seriously, i was complaining about having to get up early for therapy and he told me that i shouldn’t be going to therapy anymore bc i’m ‘better now’)
4) my mom thinks i’m doing swell, perfectly fine, peachy, and an increase in meds would mean her worrying about me more which she doesn’t fucking need right now
1) i don’t want to be more dependent on meds
2) having a higher dose means it’s harder for me to get off of it
3) my dad doesn’t want me on any more meds because he thinks i’m magically cured of depression even though i went through so much shit this past year (seriously, i was complaining about having to get up early for therapy and he told me that i shouldn’t be going to therapy anymore bc i’m ‘better now’)
4) my mom thinks i’m doing swell, perfectly fine, peachy, and an increase in meds would mean her worrying about me more which she doesn’t fucking need right now
but i feel like if i stay silent, and don’t talk about what’s going on, and tell my doctor that i’m fine, she’s just gonna leave things the way they are and i won’t see her for another month and i’ll just progressively get worse during that month
last month i chose option 3, and i stayed silent, and no meds were changed, and i said i was just gonna stick it out and see how things go and they’ve only gotten worse
Hun. Your mental health is more important than the stress level of others. You need to take care of yourself. It doesn't matter what your family thinks about your mental health, it matters that it is addressed. Also, remember you can always reach out to me to vent if you want
i watched this penguin show on netflix and it was so fucking sad?? like one got lost from the pack and was all alone i wanted 2 cry
like forcing your gf to hold your hand in public when she doesn’t want to, etc.
just bc so many people brush it off as “nothing” when it’s actually a fkn violation?? and if you were to tell someone that your partner is overstepping your boundaries like that they’d literally just be like “nah fam they’re just being cute” or ask you why you didn’t want to hold hands in the first place
i,, dunno. it’s just something that irks me bc things like that are still violations of boundaries but still get brushed off sOOOoooooOo easily and i’m just like,,
just bc so many people brush it off as “nothing” when it’s actually a fkn violation?? and if you were to tell someone that your partner is overstepping your boundaries like that they’d literally just be like “nah fam they’re just being cute” or ask you why you didn’t want to hold hands in the first place
i,, dunno. it’s just something that irks me bc things like that are still violations of boundaries but still get brushed off sOOOoooooOo easily and i’m just like,,
also shoutout to the person who came up behind me and covered my eyes and was like “guess who” last week and caused a panic attack
also shoutout to the person who came up behind me and covered my eyes and was like “guess who” last week and caused a panic attack
this is @ every fanfic ever where Y/N is angry so Harry stares into your eyes with his bright green orbs and kisses you roughly to get you to shut up— that’s 👏 fuckin 👏 weird 👏
i recently got back into fanfiction due to lack of content for a ship i have (real ones know who i’m referring to 🤪) and lemme fuckin tell you how goddamn toxic this shit is
90% of it is triggering/has triggering themes like depression, self harm, drugs, assault, abuse, etc. and i’d say less than 50% of it has TW/CW on it
99% of the gay stuff is written by straight girls with a weird fetish (don’t tell me this isn’t real. straight guys watching lesbian porn is the same shit.)
99.9% of it is written so wrong and glorifies things that should not be glorified and glosses over things that should not be glossed over
99% of the gay stuff is written by straight girls with a weird fetish (don’t tell me this isn’t real. straight guys watching lesbian porn is the same shit.)
99.9% of it is written so wrong and glorifies things that should not be glorified and glosses over things that should not be glossed over
“Y/N, meet your new masters— harry, louis, liam, niall, and zayn”
me: uhhhhh that’s human trafficking actually and selling your daughter as a sex slave is not something that should be glorified/seen as a good thing, y’all are fucking WEIRD
me: uhhhhh that’s human trafficking actually and selling your daughter as a sex slave is not something that should be glorified/seen as a good thing, y’all are fucking WEIRD
when you get subtweeted by someone who you haven't talked to in months and you realize he never really got over you :)
Books mentioned in this topic
The Past and Other Things That Should Stay Buried (other topics)Will Grayson, Will Grayson (other topics)
Bridge of Clay (other topics)
The Art of Being Normal (other topics)
Clockwork Princess (other topics)
More...
Authors mentioned in this topic
E.B. White (other topics)Sidney Sheldon (other topics)
Jane Austen (other topics)




A - IF I'M IN LOVE.
i am not. not at all.
B - WHO THE LAST PERSON I TALKED TO ON THE PHONE WAS.
my mom.
C - HOW LONG IT'S BEEN SINCE I'VE KISSED.
uhhhh a lonnnng time. maybe six months or more.
D - IF I HAVE A PREFERENCE FOR BOYS OR GIRLS.
boys but i like girls too!
E - HOW MANY PIERCINGS I HAVE.
one and a half-closed one.
F - GIVE ME ANY OPTIONS, LIKE 'HOT OR COLD?'
?
G - THE LAST PERSON I SAID 'I LOVE YOU' TO.
m.h.
H - THE LAST PERSON I HUGGED.
m.h.
I - THE LAST TIME I FELT JEALOUS, AND WHY.
prolly when my cats cuddle my mom instead of me :(
J - ARE YOU INSECURE. WHAT ABOUT?
yes, my body
K - WHAT MY FULL NAME IS.
jayson oliver s.
L - IF I HAVE SIBLINGS.
i have one sister
M - IF I FORGIVE BETRAYAL.
rarely
N - FAVOURITE ANIMAL?
cat, pig
O - WHERE WOULD I LIKE TO TRAVEL
everywhere omg
P - WHAT KIND OF MUSIC I LIKE.
all the good shit
Q - FAVOURITE FLOWER?
rose
R - IS CHEATING EVER OKAY?
nope
S - 2 HABITS.
my nail biting and my procrastination
T - 3 THINGS I LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY.
milo, misha, water
U - FAVOURITE TIME OF YEAR, AND WHY
fall because of the weather and starting school again
V - BIG DREAMS?
own a lake house up north
W - IF I'VE DONE SOMETHING I REGRET VERY MUCH.
very many things.
X - 3 TURN ONS
hair pulling, gentle touches, soft kisses
Y - 3 TURNS OFFS
feet, bloody/slobbery/messy kisses, and pain
Z - ASK ANY QUESTION YOU WANT.
im glad to be done with this because of the all caps