chin up and we'll drown a little slower; Showing 43,051-43,100 of 46,581

[[deleted user]]

dont think im: not

[jay, rip]

mm:hmm

[jay, rip]

i want an ecosphere

[jay, rip]

i could really use some lemon curd rn

[Deepthi]

*gives virtual lemon curd*

[jay, rip]

thanks lmao

[jay, rip]

i feel like baking. i haven’t baked in a while.

[Deepthi]

jay wrote: "thanks lmao"

Np

[Deepthi]

Do you like cooking?

[jay, rip]

i do, when i’m in the right mood

[Deepthi]

That's nice :)

[[deleted user]]

jay wrote: "i feel like baking. i haven’t baked in a while."
do you like making anything specific?

[jay, rip]

ehhh usually things that aren’t really complicated to bake but are intricate to decorate.

[jay, rip]

like sugar cookies, yknow. i’m really into cookie decorating.

[jay, rip]

my mood is like. a 0 rn.

[jay, rip]

when my mom told me that my brother was going into hospice with two weeks to live, she said (and i quote): “this is going to be the hardest thing any of us will ever have to go through.”

clearly, she’s never lived with any sort of mental illness

[jay, rip]

i can say with 100% certainty that him dying was not the hardest thing i’ve been through. and i will also say that i’ll probably go through things harder than him dying.

[jay, rip]

she doesn’t understand

[jay, rip]

nobody fucking understands what i’m feeling. everyone’s sad about his death, sad because it’s his birthday, just sad everywhere. me? if he were to have disappeared without the reactions of everyone else, i would’ve been fine

[jay, rip]

this might sound awful, but

[jay, rip]

like okay, everyone’s dealing with overwhelming sadness right now, and they have been since he died. but the thing is... i don’t feel sad? like i did at first but right now i’m just kind of... i’m numb. i’m back to being who i am, which is someone who fights with their own mind every millisecond. i’m just.

[jay, rip]

i’m feeling 56969587373 things and i don’t know how to express any of them

[jay, rip]

there’s been an overwhelming sadness consuming every fiber of my being for most of my life and i can’t handle it

[jay, rip]

unpopular opinion: breakups are worse than deaths.

when someone dies, they’re not willingly leaving you. they’re not looking at you with disgust because they’re stuck with you and are only with you because they pity you. they’re not falling out of love with you for the same reasons they fell in love with you. they’re not taking off the promise ring that you got them. they’re not looking you in the eye and telling you that they don’t want to be in your life anymore. they’re not doing it on purpose

[jay, rip]

I don’t know if it’s just me, but having someone look at you and hand back your stuff and tell you that they’re not in love with you any more, even though they’re the center of your universe... that hurts more than someone dying

[jay, rip]

happy birthday, big J. i don’t really believe that you’re in a better place, but you believed that you would be going somewhere after you died. wherever you are, in a coffin, in purgatory, in heaven... happy 25th birthday

[jay, rip]

there, i did it. i said happy birthday to him.

[Deepthi]

Hey, chill... Depression and stuff sucks as hell, but we've got to be strong

[Deepthi]

Are you online..?

[jay, rip]

yeah i’m here

[jay, rip]

beaten in lips- beartooth

[Deepthi]

jay wrote: "yeah i’m here"

Sorry, I had to go...

[jay, rip]

when we got to the cemetery at 10 am, there was 8 boqets of flowers and a birthday balloon.

[jay, rip]

my sister brought me a rough amethyst crystal from the dominican republican and a little vial of sand from a beach in the bahamas

[jay, rip]

when she came back she told us all about her cruise and i was like,,, father pls let’s not do a cruise can we just go to disney again instead

[jay, rip]

:)

[jay, rip]

today was better than i expected actually

[jay, rip]

I DONT WANNA MISS ONE SMILE. I DONT WANNA MISS ONE KISS.

[jay, rip]

when you get a phone call when you’re in the middle of something and the mood is completely ruined and you can’t even reject the call bc it’s your mom

[jay, rip]

merry chrysler eve, the presents that were sent to me from the two lights of my life are locked in a building that is closed for the holidays

[jay, rip]

it’s been 3 years since my first suicide attempt. i just realized that.
and things still haven’t gone back to normal?? like i tried to kill myself with a certain item and i’m still not allowed to have that specific item with me when i’m alone

[jay, rip]

my depression didn’t allow me to clean my room for weeks so i was living in a literal pigsty but then at 10:30 pm on christmas evemy depression was like “ok you gotta clean it. now.” so i got up out of bed, cleaned my entire room, did the bed, vacuumed, dusted everything, folded my laundry and put it away, and then undid the bed to go back to sleep.

[jay, rip]

https://santatracker.google.com/intl/...

[jay, rip]

“are you a virgin”
no
“would you like to change that”
get out of my house

[jay, rip]

merry chrysler, santa skipped my house :(

[[deleted user]]

jay wrote: "“are you a virgin”
no
“would you like to change that”
get out of my house"

An actual conversation that'll go down on my wedding night

[jay, rip]

my bed is rly high off the ground and yesterday i was getting down from it and my knee locked up so i fell and now my right thigh is completely black and blue :)

[Deepthi]

jay wrote: "my bed is rly high off the ground and yesterday i was getting down from it and my knee locked up so i fell and now my right thigh is completely black and blue :)"

:(
Ice it... It's gonna help

[jay, rip]

me: *complaining about the building with my christmas presentable in it being closed*
kass: :(
me: you know what this means tho
kass: what
me: this calls for a trip to the mall

[jay, rip]

slightest inconvenience: happens
me: pitches a fit and goes to the mall