~the sea does not like to be restrained (Kavi's journal)~ Showing 13,201-13,250 of 20,354

[kavi ~he-him~]

I put a lot of hot sauce on my sandwich

[kavi ~he-him~]

I like spicy food, but not too much spicy

[kavi ~he-him~]

When I was little I used to hate spicy food, but now I like it.

[kavi ~he-him~]

so I finished my re-interpretation of the new AA cover

[kavi ~he-him~]

and I posted it on Insta and I tagged all of the AA guys in it

https://www.instagram.com/p/BbsXTa9gnHb/

[kavi ~he-him~]

and Sam from AA liked my post!!

[kavi ~he-him~]

I hope the AA guys like it

[kavi ~he-him~]

I checked my weight after a really long time, and I'm 96 lbs now O_O yay!

[kavi ~he-him~]

it's not a lot. but it's better then how much I weighed last time I checked

[kavi ~he-him~]

I weighed around 86 lbs and it went down to 84 and 83 and 82 but now it went up to 96 lbs.

[kavi ~he-him~]

I showed my mom my weight and she said that I'm becoming fat, and I should maintain my weight

[kavi ~he-him~]

and I was like, "it's better then the last time I weigh."

[kavi ~he-him~]

I don't really like being skinny. I don't like the feeling when my clothes feel so loose because I'm so light.

[kavi ~he-him~]

true, ppl might judge me if I'm fat, but they'll judge me if I'm skinny anyways.

[kavi ~he-him~]

not that I care if ppl judge me or not

[kavi ~he-him~]

I looked at myself in the mirror while getting dressed a couple times.

[kavi ~he-him~]

I don't really like my body

[kavi ~he-him~]

but tbh I don't really care whether ppl judge me about being skinny or being fat. I'm just trying to focus on my health rn


except for me having a sweet tooth and sweets being my weakness

[kavi ~he-him~]

mainly my mental health tho

[kavi ~he-him~]

thanks

[kavi ~he-him~]

I'm tired. even tho I slept well

[kavi ~he-him~]

Ben Smith wrote: "Dude I know how you feel. Also, I was just inches away from buying In The End on Rocksmith so I could learn to play it on bass."

nice

[kavi ~he-him~]

I'd been feeling really tired lately, even tho I sleep well. I don't sleep well ALL the time, but most of the time.

[kavi ~he-him~]

I need to stop saying "good" whenever someone asks me "how are you?"

because I'm not really fully good.

[kavi ~he-him~]

and I don't really know how I am

[kavi ~he-him~]

usually when someone asks me that question I say "I'm good" or "I'm okay" depends on my mood.

[kavi ~he-him~]

tbh I don't really like the question "how are you?" anymore


is that bad?

[kavi ~he-him~]

I don't really talk about my feelings often, except in this journal, or with some friends.

[kavi ~he-him~]

that's why I don't like it, cause it's just pointless, because most answers will be either "good" or "tired" or "don't ask me that question" or they'll say how they are really feeling but most ppl will say good.

[kavi ~he-him~]

and even if those ppl say "good", they don't always mean it.

[kavi ~he-him~]

I don't really like the question "are you okay?" either because irl it's difficult for me to talk about my feelings out loud because I'm not that good at talking because I'm shy. And I have difficulties asking for help even if I desperately need it, so I just say "Yes" whenever someone asks me that question.

[kavi ~he-him~]

Jonathan asked me that question a lot. And I always said yes, even if I wasn't really okay. He once noticed that I was feeling sad, even tho I was trying to mask my sadness, and he asked if I was okay, and I said yeah, and he said that I seemed sad, and I said I'm fine. And he didn't push.

[kavi ~he-him~]

somehow, he can see through my mask, idk how.

[kavi ~he-him~]

He's the only one that can see through my mask irl

[kavi ~he-him~]

Ben Smith wrote: "He has a special power to see the real you. It only comes with time and love.

I have to go for a bit. I hope you are here when I get back. If not then please try to have a good night."

okay see you

[kavi ~he-him~]

once, Jon also asked me "how are you?" and I say "good" and then he said, "Kavya don't just say good, use more than one word."

[kavi ~he-him~]

somehow Jon, can make me smile uncontrollably, even if I'm not in the mood to smile

[kavi ~he-him~]

somehow Jon can just cheer me up, just by being there.

[kavi ~he-him~]

how can ONE person make me feel like this?

[kavi ~he-him~]

welcome back

[kavi ~he-him~]

also my brother is bring some friends home later today and it's 10:28 pm. And I have a class at 8:30 am tomorrow and I have to get up at 6:50 am, I'm not a morning person

[kavi ~he-him~]

XD some of the fan accounts on Twitter and Insta, keep scaring me, because at first I think they are the band members' real accounts, but then I realize that they are fan accounts

[kavi ~he-him~]

I love photoshop

[kavi ~he-him~]

it's so cool.

[kavi ~he-him~]

I haven't been on Deviantart in a while

[kavi ~he-him~]

Ben Smith wrote: "Can you photoshop me something?"

sure, what do you want me to do?

[kavi ~he-him~]

my edit of Andy Biersack from Black Veil Brides

https://seagirl33.deviantart.com/art/...

[kavi ~he-him~]

My edit of Black veil Brides

https://seagirl33.deviantart.com/art/...

[kavi ~he-him~]

My edit of CC from Bvb

https://seagirl33.deviantart.com/art/...

[kavi ~he-him~]

My edit of myself

https://seagirl33.deviantart.com/art/...


I did these last month but I forgot to edit them.