~the sea does not like to be restrained (Kavi's journal)~ Showing 12,851-12,900 of 20,354

[kavi ~he-him~]

but life came in the way

[kavi ~he-him~]

I SHOULD'VE TOLD HIM!!

[kavi ~he-him~]

yes but 5 or 6 months ago, the last week of school before the final exams week, it was the last meeting of anime club and we were having a party, and at the end of the party, before I left I hugged Jon, and he smiled and hugged me back, he hugged me tightly, so that our bodies were touching, and my head was on his shoulder. And then my friend Carlos, asked us if we were back together, and Jon yelled, "YES!!" with a smile. And I looked at him then I hugged him again, and he goes like, "ahh too many hugs," then Carlos asked us the same question and then Jon goes and punches him (don't worry he didn't hurt him, it was playful), but I got really confused, and I was unsure whether we were together or not, then the next day at lunch, before I left for class, I hugged Jon, and he smiled and hugged me back, tightly, so that our bodies were touching and my head was on his shoulder. and then Carlos asked that same question again and Jon goes and pushes him (don't worry he didn't hurt him it was playful) but it's been 5 months since I seen him in person......

[kavi ~he-him~]

I miss him, I miss those moments. I love him

[kavi ~he-him~]

he confuses me tho :/ but I still love him

[kavi ~he-him~]

but last year when we were in the relationship before we broke up, I should've done something to save our relationship. I should've told him that, either way, whether we are together or not, it would still hurt me a lot, because his pain= my pain, and I love him and care for him a lot.

[kavi ~he-him~]

then again we both let our insecurities run the relationship and I learned a lot of lessons from the break up.

[kavi ~he-him~]

WTH!!! I GO ON TWITTER AND I SEE SOME PICS OF SOME OF THE CHARACTERS FROM STRANGER THINGS' FACES PHOTOSHOPPED ONTO SOME OTHER PPL'S BODIES XDDDD I'M DYING!! OMFG WHO DID THIS????!!!!

[kavi ~he-him~]

XD

[kavi ~he-him~]

so last night I had a dream that my parents died and I got adopted by Andy Biersack and Juliet Simms

[kavi ~he-him~]

And Andy's parents were there too. Jonathan was mentioned in the dream but he wasn't there

[kavi ~he-him~]

2017 is almost over

[kavi ~he-him~]

this year went by so fast

[kavi ~he-him~]

I wonder what 2018 is going to be like

[kavi ~he-him~]

also I think I'm going to make Andy's birthday edit earlier. His birthday is on December 26th but time.

[kavi ~he-him~]

is it bad that I'm shipping Mike and Eleven?

[kavi ~he-him~]

Also

[kavi ~he-him~]

Do you guys see this???


https://www.instagram.com/p/BbLj-1BgXk4/

[kavi ~he-him~]

2017 was a good year

[kavi ~he-him~]

it had some ups and downs, along with the other years

[kavi ~he-him~]

but it's also a special year for me, one of the special years but still.

[kavi ~he-him~]

because this is the year I graduated from High school and I turned 18

[kavi ~he-him~]

and so, I'm an adult now, even tho I'm still a kid at heart.

[kavi ~he-him~]

I don't feel like an adult tho. I am 18 but I don't feel any different

[kavi ~he-him~]

I hate my mind

[kavi ~he-him~]

my mind be trying to bring me down

[kavi ~he-him~]

I'm scared.....

[kavi ~he-him~]

of my demons

[kavi ~he-him~]

Overthinking kills

[kavi ~he-him~]

I need to stop overthinking

[kavi ~he-him~]

but it's difficult

[kavi ~he-him~]

I tend to overthink more when I'm alone

[kavi ~he-him~]

so, I've been doing some thinking lately....

[kavi ~he-him~]

And....I feel like I should've taken a year off after I graduated from hIgh school, and before I started college.

[kavi ~he-him~]

because I'm trying to focus on my mental health too

[kavi ~he-him~]

I want to live, and I want to win this war.

[kavi ~he-him~]

And I should also start drinking more water, because I don't drink much. And I tend to forget to drink water

[kavi ~he-him~]

so I think, I'm going to start off every new page, in my journal, with a reminder to do something important

[kavi ~he-him~]

maybe it'll be easier. maybe I'll set it on my phone

[kavi ~he-him~]

one of the reminders will be to drink water

[kavi ~he-him~]

maybe it'll help

[kavi ~he-him~]

done

[kavi ~he-him~]

so, I found this site called 7cups, 3 months ago, and its basically like a site where you can go, and talk to others and get support for your issues. It's also like a therapy thing, you can talk to someone on 1 on 1 or you can join a group chat

[kavi ~he-him~]

I feel dead inside today for some reason.....

[kavi ~he-him~]

I'm not sad, but I'm not happy, either

[kavi ~he-him~]

idek why I feel this way....

[kavi ~he-him~]

Stranger things time

[kavi ~he-him~]

spoiler alert: read at your own risk

(view spoiler)[ Mike and Eleven had a moment!! (hide spoiler)]

[kavi ~he-him~]

I finished season 1

[kavi ~he-him~]

so I went to a social skills class today, and one of the lights was flickering on and off