Modestly introducing Tallis Steelyard (Now nominated!) Showing 1-50 of 1,740

[Jim]

I confess that it is with some trepidation that I allow myself to be dragooned into starting my own blog thread. Almost an author thread indeed.

But I have my own small work Lambent Dreams and by own Amazon author page http://www.amazon.co.uk/-/e/B01ADOTKT... so I must indeed consider myself an author.

And of course, as is apparently obligatory, I have mine own blog.
https://tallissteelyard.wordpress.com/

which I shall endeavor to maintain to a standard I feel is becoming

Tallis

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Tallis, I do like your blog, but I find the gray on white a bit difficult to read, so I have to zoom in on the page. Would you perhaps consider changing it. Possibly to something tasteful in wine-red, for instance?

[Jim]

is it any better now, there's no option for black font in that 'theme'

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

That is an improvement. Thanks.

[Jim]

Hopefully it'll stick at that now
The only other option was black background and light font

[Patti (baconater)]

We should decant a flagon of elderberry wine in wanton celebration.

[Anna]

I've just read a post on your blog - the one about the nappy. You clearly have a good tale to tell and I was most impressed, especially by the washing machine ad that appears at the end of it!

[Jim]

The washing machine ad is purely the work of a billion striving electrons, struggling for recognition in a frantic and distraught world. I am afraid I can claim no credit for it, delightful though it is

[Jim]

Patti (baconater) wrote: "We should decant a flagon of elderberry wine in wanton celebration."

Ah, wanton celebration, now that does indeed inspire memories

[Jim]

Oh and just to note, with undue modesty, that the nappy story

http://www.abctales.com/story/jim-web...

has now got 320 'reads' on abctales and has been awarded gold cherries!
Given that nothing else has more than 80 reads and have been on there somewhat longer I think it is indicative of the value of a good title :-)

[Anna]

Jim wrote: "The washing machine ad is purely the work of a billion striving electrons, struggling for recognition in a frantic and distraught world. I am afraid I can claim no credit for it, delightful though ..."

That's because you're modest, Jim, I'm sure you worded your story especially to attract the little elves that search for opportunities.

They'll be searching our minds next. Doomed... we're all doomed.

[Patti (baconater)]

Not me. Mines empty.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Mine is full of inspiring thoughts and rainbows.

[Patti (baconater)]

Unicorn farts, she means.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Poor Tallis, Patti has already dragged his thread into the toilet!

[Patti (baconater)]

I'm gonna end up in a poem, aren't I? :(

[Jim]

I think a limerick would be more appropriate!

[Patti (baconater)]

Uh oh.

[Jim]

The words of a lady may casually wound
Leaving their scars on your soul
Weep for the poet, his guilt is presumed
As he struggles to earn his poor dole

His toil is unceasing, labouring long
The world it calls him a fool
His work he is pimping to just get along
Faced by wit that is mordent and cruel

But still he will struggle to thrill and amuse
Smiling all day through his pain
Indeed he’ll talk faster and try to bemuse
And count a few coppers as gain.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

[Jim]

:-)

[Jim]

There has been discussion on other threads about 'that dress'

https://tallissteelyard.wordpress.com...

I feel that the truth must be told

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

I should have known Tallis would have his finger in that pie!

[Jim]

How else could we guarantee that the arts were properly funded? Sit and wait for the state to provide money?

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

You'd be better off treasure hunting in a slurry pit!

[Jim]

exactly which is why I've decided I have to give fashion advice as well

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

What does Tallis think about that perennial fashion item, the flat cap?

[Jim]

Ideal for working men, philanthropists and bookmakers.
But he wouldn't recommend it for a lady

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

It has been done...

[Patti (baconater)]

Wearing a flat cap seems to reduce a lady's bosom.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

I'm starting to wonder now if that is a lady at all.

[Patti (baconater)]

Must be. Or not.

The necklace could be hiding an Adam's apple...

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

All evidence either way is well covered up.

[Patti (baconater)]

No, the hands are folded rather high waistedly.

[Jim]

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "I'm starting to wonder now if that is a lady at all."

wearing a flat cap, it's a mere woman at most!

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Well there does seem to be some question about that...

[Patti (baconater)]

Jim wrote: "Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "I'm starting to wonder now if that is a lady at all."

wearing a flat cap, it's a mere woman at most!"

'Mere woman'???

Excuse me a moment. I'm just off to delete an author thread.

[Jim]

Pah, as if a Lady would wear a flat cap.
It would be like her husband wearing socks and sandals and expecting to be called a gentleman

[David]

Ah! I only wandered in to say "Hi" but that looks to have been a mistimed idea.

*backing out quietly*

[Patti (baconater)]

Jim's intimidating demeanour has frightened off yet another potential fan.

[Jim]

Pah! Poor old Tallis has been traduced! Traduced I tell you. I knew he should never have got involved in fashion, I pleaded with him, I told him, "They not like the civilised folk you're used to in Port Naain you know," but would he listen? No he blithely waltzes in, innocent as a lamb, with no thought at all but of expanding his oeuvre and perhaps turning an honest penny and this is what happens. There'll be cap wars next, and people being lynched for wearing the wrong check.
I weep for an age of lost innocence

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

But it would make an excellent story. How about a romance between the factions? And a double suicide plan? Something fresh and new....

[Jim]

I can see it now, the drama, the pathos, we could even have it with hero and heroine who are both young and innocent. I could have Mutt as the hero

[Patti (baconater)]

It was the expanding overs what dun it.

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

Young he is, but innocent??

[Jim]

Patti (baconater) wrote: "It was the expanding overs what dun it."

I know, eight balls an over is just plain wrong!

[Jim]

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "Young he is, but innocent??"

You see how bad it's got, people are now channelling Yoda!

A number of years ago I had to do a scenario for a Role Playing Company. It was set it Italy in the 14th/15th century

It basically took the tale of Romeo and Juliet from the Balcony scene where Nurse, a sensible lady, threw a bucket of water over Romeo and ensured that Juliet spent more time with her pony

[Jim]

Just to say that having just tidied up a Benor tale that I'd found, I realise that Mutt does have a lady of his own age whom he seems to admire.
Suddenly everything seems to be coming together and I hope you all realise that this is entirely Gingerlily's fault!

[Gingerlily - The Full Wild]

What? What? I was out all day helping a friend buy carpet. Nothing to do with me...

[Jim]

Gingerlily - Mistress Lantern wrote: "What? What? I was out all day helping a friend buy carpet. Nothing to do with me..."

to deny is to confirm!