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Debatabase > Does age disparity matter in relations

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message 1: by Rakhi (new)

Rakhi (rakhiwellnessbooks) | 740 comments Does age disparity matter in relations? Does it matter if the male is younger or elder or the same age as the female.


message 2: by Ahtims (last edited Oct 06, 2015 09:36PM) (new)

Ahtims (embeddedinbooks) | 47116 comments Mod
I feel it is a highly personalized matter and generalization is near to impossible.
Personally, I feel relationship between people aged close to each other is much easier, as there would be synchronized ageing, ideation etc.


message 3: by Rakhi (new)

Rakhi (rakhiwellnessbooks) | 740 comments Shalini wrote: "I feel it is a highly personalized matter and generalization is near to impossible.
Personally, I feel relationship between people aged close to each other is much easier, as there would be synchr..."


I too had the same view till I met some families.
One is where wife was six years elder
Other one wife was nine years younger
Then there is my family where there was practically no age difference.

The way the three families proceeded was different but everyone was happily married till now. This made me think about the pre-set notion of age disparity. Actually the first two families had to face tornadoes before wedding, because of the age. That's why came up with this question


message 4: by Ahtims (new)

Ahtims (embeddedinbooks) | 47116 comments Mod
my parents too are 9 years apart, and they are getting along fine. But I have seen the Bollywood marriages where wives were a decade or more older than the husbands flop. Perhaps, At least in India, people prefer the females younger.


message 5: by Luffy Sempai (new)

Luffy Sempai (luffy79) Hi. I think women are equal to men in many ways, but in some respects, intellectually, they can move up one gear. Most men don't have that mental make-up. If the wife/girlfriend is even 5 years older, she will dominate the relationship in either overt or hidden ways. Unless the guy is cool with it, or is blissfully ignorant that her better half is getting bored of him(I repeat, not in all fields), they won't be soulmates. If a patriarchal society wants faithful and submissive wives, it will promote monogamous matchmaking where the man is older. Just my opinion.


message 6: by Rakhi (new)

Rakhi (rakhiwellnessbooks) | 740 comments Psychologically, it takes more time for men to get matured. The maturity that a girl shows at the age of 18 would be shown by a man at the age of 21 but current scenario is different. These days, over pampering has made the kids intolerable to everything that they wont adjust to any situation irrespective of age.


message 7: by Karman (new)

Karman (khwabieda) | 371 comments well I'm not that old to have a good opinion about it but as of till now I have seen that people who have been pampered more adjust less and may dominate the other and this may somehow affect the relationship adversely. partners today expect their better half to understand things from their point of view and so maybe the lesser the age difference more will be the understanding.


message 8: by Karman (new)

Karman (khwabieda) | 371 comments but then I have seen some couples with this age difference also but they have great understanding. so I think it's the understanding that matters mostly not the age..


message 9: by Rakhi (new)

Rakhi (rakhiwellnessbooks) | 740 comments Yeah that's what matters
I wish the new generation understood this


message 10: by Karman (new)

Karman (khwabieda) | 371 comments well yes.. actually I belong in this generation but I think I had this wonderful example of my grandparents who made me understand the importance of understanding other person's situation.


message 11: by Karman (new)

Karman (khwabieda) | 371 comments so I try to empathise with other's but when the same is not reciprocated it feels very bad. People today want everyone to understand their situation but are not willing to do the same.


message 12: by Sheetal (new)

Sheetal (sheevi) | 327 comments I guess this thing depends on person and its totally individual's choice. If the relation have good understanding, the age factor will not show the impact. Rest it depends on the quality of the nature and relationship.


message 13: by Komal (new)

Komal | 2 comments i think same age person understand each other more deeply; they know each other's taste, style and need of their age and generation and most importantly each other's tantrums.


message 14: by Ahtims (new)

Ahtims (embeddedinbooks) | 47116 comments Mod
I feel mental age varies a lot. My 13 year old son thinks like a 30 year old, whereas I am still in my late teens mentally.
Physically, if there is age disparity, there may be health and physical compatibility issues later on.
Not very sure. Just a conjecture.


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