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Merlin Sandhill WSC tells all, and then some that you didn't really want to know about in the first place
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Merlin
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Mar 16, 2014 02:04PM
Hi guys! this is my journal
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First off, I'll start by telling everybody the biz on my name.1. Merlin: this came from when I was in a beaver dam destruction crew, and we had to come up with "threatening" names for ourselves. My twin got Nightingale, I got Merlin. Both are meant to be the birds. The names didn't stick, but later, my friend wanted my personality/life to be included in a book she was writing about people in our school, but who were superheroes. She needed a surname, and I remembered my name Merlin from the destruction crew and thought "why not!" so I've kept it for all my accounts everywhere
2. Sandhill: This part of my name is kind of new, so it won't be as long as the first.My family and I were driving home, after a belt test I had recently (I GOT YELLOW BELT, GUYS!) and they were all "You need a name for your martial arts." So they were brainstorming, about how I have long legs and a skinny body, and my older sister was like "CRANE!" but the cranes we have around here are called "sandhill cranes" So we went with Sandhill
3. Winchester: Let me just tell you right now, that my real last name is not Winchester. Sadly.I just really, really like the T.V series "Supernatural" and in fact, love Sam and Cas and Dean like no tomorrow, so I guess I can just dream I'm part of the Winchester family, right?
Uggh Now I have to put Sam and Dean too, I guess :)
\
Annnnd one more, sorrrry
GOTTA LOVE THAT GABE
Hmmm.. I think I'll post 12 things about me now!
1. I have never had a blog like thing before, so this is a first. YAY!!2. I am a superwholock, but more super and lock, and less who....so SUPER-who-LOCK? (I don't get to watch much who, cuz I odnt have cabel WAHHH)
3. I have a twin, named Nadia-aka Nightingale. Go see her sometime, shes lonely, but super awesome :)
4. I'm currently single, but only because I keep saying no to people who ask me out. I don't know why.
5. I am 13, 14 in two months
6. I play the French horn!
7. I have a deep love for classical music, but I also love alternative rock, rock, pop, alternative, screamo, well.....kind of anything.
8. I live in Alaska. It ain't cold. We don't live in igloos, we don't ride polar bears, and practically none of us are rich.
9. I have chickens, a dove, a dog, cats, and some fishysss.
10. My profile picture is an actual picture of me...for now :)
11. I ship almost all of the gay ships in Supernatural and Sherlock, so Johnlovk, Moriarlock, Sabriel, Destiel, Wincest etc etc etc! (don't hate)
12. I love Sam, Castiel, and Dean.
heres a link, I failed to mention that I allllso love FotC!!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9Qu3...
Okay guys, I'm going to telll you all a little something. Something that makes me sad.
I like this guy, but he's my friendDoesn't return affeccction
I've hinted my love and yet no retaliation
I seem to be feeling the underappreciation
OF the FREIIIIIIIINDDDDDD-ZOOOOOOOONe (I just made up a song!)
Okay, that was...random. Should I start dating my posts. Okay, adoring crowd, I will.3/20/14
In a land far, far away.
Where evil lurks behind corners in the night
A girl types furiously on her keyboard,
unaware of the danger that seeks her
Okay guys, I know none of you really care...why would anyone even look at my journal...there's simply so many!...but I know I haven't been on much! Im sorry, I've just been rping with someone named Dean Winchester...and Sam Winchester...And Castiel. I'm supppper happy, they're the dudes I fangirl about all the time, but I don't know whether to trust them or not. They seem too....mysterious...and abrupt.
They dared me to go on a "hunting trip" with them. Don't know how that would work, they do post from New York, so...yeah
Have I told you I have trust issues?
3/25/14
Heyyy I'm back...for today. I had to go to self defense class before, that's why I left (Not like anyone cares, but....anyways) Here's some more stuff about me
1. I take a self defense class, which, if I spelled, I guarantee you would miss-pronounce
2. I love National Geographic
3. I have trust issues (I think I mentioned that before...)
Ennnnyweys, have a nice week! I'll try to update dis more often!
3/25/14
(should I sign this fancy of something? Have some sort of signature? Idk)
He thinks that man is me!He knew him at a glance!
That stranger he has found
This man could be my chance
Why should I save his hide
Why should I right this wrong
When I have come so far
And struggled for so long?
If I speak, I am condemned
If I stay silent, I am damned!
I am the master of hundreds of workers
They all look to me
How can I abandon them, how can they live
If I am not free?
If I speak, I am condemned
If I stay silent, I am damned!
Who am I?
Can I condemn this man to slavery
Pretend I do not see his agony
This innocent who bears my face
Who goes to judgement in my place
Who am I?
Can I conceal myself for evermore?
Pretend I'm not the man I was before?
And must my name until I die
Be no more than an alibi?
Must I lie?
How can I ever face my fellow man?
How can I ever face myself again?
My soul belongs to God, I know
I made that bargain long ago
He gave me hope, when hope was gone
He gave me strength to journey on
[He steps in front of the court]
Who am I?
Who am I?
I am Jean Valjean!
And so Javert, you see it's true,
That man bears no more guilt than you!
Who am I?
24601!
April 15th, 2014 Oh yes, that was a quote from the musical Les Miserables.
I should have probably mentioned that, sorry :)
Either way, what happened today:
My best friend asked me out a while ago. I don't really like him extremely much in that way, but I didn't want to break his heart. So now I'm stuck in this situation of not being singlized, and not liking the relationship I'm in...
My sister told me to wait until the end of the year to break it off, but I don't know how comfortable I am with being with him until then, it just feels wrong. So as you can tell, I'm kind of distressed by this :(
However, school is going good, and it's almost over anyways...
Also, my computer has decided it can no longer charge :( So now I can't watch youtube, or go on Goodreads nearly as much, or find out new music, so yeahhhh
I'm going to my self defense class soon though, bros...so, bye! Stay happy!
-Merlin, the martial arts master and computer addict
April 21, 2014 Okay, so I broke it off with my bf today. I feel so guil;ty, he cried and had a panic attack type thing. I punched a concrete wall...and a locker...4 times...
So my hands are pretty messed up. I feel super guilty, breaking his heart. I feel so so awful.
BUTTT On the flip side, I've been planting trees in pots in my room, and I put just some nice greenery in there. And I've been cleaning every week. (SURPRISE SURPRISE!) I think it's spring fever or something, making me feel sort of free and alive. The relationship thing is guess made me feel trapped
Also, I have been crushing on two people now. A girl, and a guy older than me, but not by much. It's awkward because they both are related to either a teacher of mine past of present, or one of my best friends.
Does this mean I count as bi? I don't know. Or particularly care.
PEACE OUT BROS! Enjoy the spring!
-Magggles the green thumb and heartbreaker
p.s:I've started signing mine based on what's goin on in life for me. Stay tuned!
The guy I broke up with (yeah...the best friend) Is best buds with me again. Yay!Sorry for the short post
-Maagglles, the NOT heartbreaker, and best friend
May 1st, 2014 I'm in a sticky situation.
I like a girl, an older guy(only a year or two), and a guy who goes to another school.
My friends on Goodreads (lol, my ONLY friends, jk) said to go for the girl, she is my friend, after all...
However, today she just seems to have...more friends. Like she doesn't want/need to be with me. And it doesn't help that I've been having to endure her constant ravings over a certain guy. I keep ending up helping her try to win over this guy...and it's put me in a bad mood
If not to upset me more, last week I had a meeting with my best friend, my sister and her boyfriend, and a counselor to talk about how my sister and her boyfriend aren't being super nice to us friends, and how they've been excluding us from stuff. We made guidelines, and everything was okay for all us bros. But after that talk, nothing feels like it's changed, in fact, they're excluding us more in comparison to other friends. :(
AND, to add to that, I was really hungry. And just to tell you, Im not me when I'm hungry. So I was kind of a biatch to my sister and her bf.
This simple sentence explains just about my entire day
-Maggie, the conflicted hungerer
I've said some pretty nasty things when I was hungry too; you can't blame yourself, Mags-it's your stummy's fault.
May 7th, 2014 I have been sick
For so long.
(It feels like it, at least...unrelenting fever for two days? COME ON!!!)
Thank goodness though, I kind of broke my friend's heart...kinda...but for the better of my emotionality...(when I lie, I get emotional problems...especially when I lie about liking someone)
So I'm in a good mood. Except for that since I missed school today, I missed biking to school...with my crush :( :P Oh well.
I got my computer back from the repair place...NOW WATCH SOME DARK SOULS TWO :P
-Maggie, the self preserving youtuber
May 14 2014 I have never missed school so much
Aforesaid, I've been sick.
For a week.
And just saying, time goes by soooo much slower when your sick. It felt like a month.
So I missed a bunch of experience and friend moments, but coming back to school...IT'S ALL HERE!!!! ^.^
I also have to study for finals in the future (note: FUTURE-I'm procrastinating right now) and it's kind of distressing me how much work for studying the teachers expect us to do. 7 pages of math? Really?
3 pages of terms for History notecards..? Serious?
At least I have my computer back. I'm so happy to be able to read fanfiction and watch Pewdiepie and Tobuscus....and youtube in general, because of the music, and feels, and laughs that I get from it. It is definitely a part of my life, as stupid as that feels to be said
-Marglkes, procrastinating reader and writer
May 18, 2014 A lot of you might not appreciate triathlons...
I did one today. AND BOY AM I TIRED.
I was talking to a guy before, and we were talking about why people do it. Going through such pain to get only a silly achievement. And we decided (rightfully so) that it's all about being proud afterwards, about pushing yourself to the limits and being amazed at what you can do. I ran four miles today, non-stop. I haven't ever done that.
Lesson from that story?: Do hard things, because you'll realize that you're awesomer than you think
Also, next week is the LAST WEEK OF SCHOOL. WHO'S EXCITED??!?!?!?!?!?!
*I am*
^.^
-Merlin, wisdom teacher
cool bro. real cool. proud of you man :)
May, the 19th, 2014 I cannot describe my unhappiness.
Today, we found out what our results were for the GNT (Gold nugget triathlon) and I found out I got a total of 1 hour, 40 minutes, and 9th in my age group! YAY!!
But my twin just has to take the cake, doesn't she?
2nd.
In.
Our.
Age.
Group.
I was super proud, and kind of hurt, I mean, she's always been he pretty "I don't even have to try to be awesome and athletic one", the one with a style, and the boyfriend.
But, this has happened before...I just tend towards winning more intellectual activities, whereas she wins more of the athletics and determination. No biggie.
So we went to the awards banquet today, and she got a medal. Again, NBD right?
But afterwards, this lady comes up to me, and congratulated me for 2nd. I told her I wasn't the one, that I was the twin of her. So she asked me how I got. I told her ninth place, and she was all like
"Did your bike break or something? What happened?"
I know she was being awesome and nice, but honestly, that really just crushed my personal parade of Yeah! I did great! and kinda replaced it with Not great enough
Im not sure if anybody relates, but if you disagree or want to argue, please don't. I am really unhappy.
(Just putting that out there.)
-The one kind of tired of being shadowed
Yeahhh....*imagining you in a pink tracksuit with a whistle and a blonde wig*
Nooo......
It's okay, you look pretty fine in that tracksuit.:P *not creepy at all*
I didn't mean it.
May 25 2014 I had this weird thought today.
I always like taking quizzes on Quotev, the site where there's just a MULTITUDE of quizzes and fanfic, and some of the quizzes are kinda personal.
So there's always a few ones about health issues that I just go for, bein like "Why not?"
So either way, whenever it comes to mental health, I always show up as schizophrenic. And I laugh about it too. It's hilarious!
But today, I realized why I can't decide whether I like someone or not. It's because I don't!
This is going to sound suppppper bonkers, but I'm just gonna write it as it is.
All the time, even when I'm sleeping, or showering, or cooking alone, I feel like someone's watching me. Like literally, I sometimes just talk to the someone who I feel like is there, and sort of impress/be with that "person". It is so not as crazy as it sounds.
It mostly feels like a lover, or some sort of beau who loves me that is with me, so it usually isn't stressful to feel this weird presence. Its a nice feeling.
Sometimes, I feel like this person who whispers to my mind softly, and holds me when I'm sad is someone I know. Maybe Gar-gar, someone I kind of have close attachments to. But I realize the face of this caring "hallucination" (It's not like I see them) is kind of muddled. It doesn't ultimately have a face at all.
I really should have someone in my life, I think that's the message my mind is telling me, but no one seems to have crossed my way that is the face to that beautiful warm fuzzy thing that's always around me.
*I AM NOT CRAZY DO NOT JUDGE.*
Also, I'd like to just try and limit talking posts from people-this is kind of my journal...(NO OFFENSE)
-Maggie, the odd one
Hm. That really did not convey very much. If anyone wants another explanation, just ask
(dude, makin it awkward! I dont want to talk about it!)
I feel ya man. I get the same thing, but kinda different. It's weird, yet somehow completely normal.
Yeah. Presence, bebe.I think its just our subconcious tellin us to get with it and find someone
June 7th, 2014 Is it June already?
I was talking with an old woman at our church about that, how time passes as we go through life. For instance, when everyone's younger, Christmas is always EONS away. But now, it just seems like it comes upon you so fast you don't see it coming.
I can't believe it's June...so soon! Summer's flying by!! :(
Either way, a few days ago(I WAS too busy to post an update about this), I invited all my friends to go to Skateland (Roller rink) with me, Cuz they all kept whining about how they wanted to get all together-but no one was taking initiative. So I invited 11 people, including Nightingale and myself. It didn't bother me that a few people couldn't come, they just told me straight up that they were going to some concert or whatever. But the people who cancelled the day of....
It was depressing to say the least.
Two people said they were going to come, but never showed.
In the end, including myself and Nadia, only 4 people came to this get together
Now I know who the dependable people in my life are.
\ಠ_ಠ/
-Questioning choices of friends
June 10, 2014 It's been a long time, with just rain rain rain rain and more rain. So much rain
It's kind of a good thing-we've been having fires everywhere-but d*mnit it's depressing. As well as you can't go outside without getting surprised by a downpour of rain. It's great, but kind of annoying.
Anyways, I finally did this skit thing with these children at my church-called VBS (Vacation Bible School) It's basically where parents dump their kids for half the day so they can learn about god, and not go running into the streets like little squirrels.
So annnnnyways, there's always a skit during this, that I like to participate in, because I like being an actor. I'm good, I just don't like to act around....people at school.
But the problem is that all the kids will just tackle my arms, acting like I'm a dead carcass in a pack of wolf children. It just makes me so tired by the end of the day. THANK YOU KIDS!
It finally ended last week, and I feel like I can live again
-Maggie, aspiring actress and caretaker
June 11, 2014 Update so soon? Maggie,-oh you overachiever.
I'm going to see "the fault in our stars" today. I haven't read the book, but all I know is that it's cancer-love-book-movie-sad-sad. I gotta prepare my tissues.
But not for myself-I don't cry at movies, unless they have some DAYUM good music. Music moves me. Acting does not.
This is why I loved Les Mis and Phantom of the Opera. THAT MUSIC.
That's also the explanation why almost all of my favorite movies have some sort of great soundtrack
Les Mis
Phantom of the Opera
2001: A Space Odyssey
Doctor Horrible's Sing-Along-Blog
...
the list goes on. And they aren't even all the movies I've cried at who haven't made my top ten list.
All I know is that the movies gonna be long, sad, and sweet. The sounds of muffled sobs from behind me will be the main dialogue. I'll be called heartless by one of my sniffling friends, for which my answer, as always, be a shrug.
-Maggie Mademoiselle Melancholy Music-lover
July 9, 2014 Can you believe that?! It's been an entire month abouts since I've written in here!!
Right now I'm sick, but I'm forcing myself to go and work for my neighbor's ice cream business. I seriously need the cash, okay?
Why do I need cash, you ask?
"Maggie, all you do is squander it aimlessly!!"
...
Okay, that is true, but right now I actually am saving up for stuff
-new mp3 player, someone stole my old one
-COSTUME STUFF
-extra cash
One might also ask "Maggie, why on earth would you need costume stuff? It's MONTHS before Halloween!"
That also, is true. But Senchi-Con is soon, fast approaching in September. Nad-I mean, Nightingale has a costume for Castiel she's been working on. My options have been limited down to BBC Sherlock, or Supernatural Gabriel. I could pull off both, I know I could, but I just...don't know...which.
I LOVE THEM BOTH SO MUCH!!
One may also ask "Why do you keep pretending we care about your life by putting our "questions" in italics? Is it because you're lonely? Is it because you have nothing else to do? Is it because you have an hour and a half before work at the...ice cream whatever thing?"
Yes.
It is.
-Sick Lonesome. (that's a kind of nice sounding name, dontcha think?)
July 18th 2014 Blue jean baby, L.A. lady, seamstress for the band
Pretty eyed, pirate smile, you'll marry a music man
Ballerina, you must have seen her dancing in the sand
And now she's in me, always with me, tiny dancer in my hand
Jesus freaks out in the street
Handing tickets out for God
Turning back she just laughs
The boulevard is not that bad
Piano man he makes his stand
In the auditorium
Looking on she sings the songs
The words she knows the tune she hums
But oh how it feels so real
Lying here with no one near
Only you and you can hear me
When I say softly slowly
HOLD ME CLOSER, TINY DANCER
COUNT THE HEADLIGHTS ON THE HIGHWAY
LAY ME DOWN IN SHEETS OF LINEN
YOU HAD A BUSY DAY TODAYYY
HOLD ME CLOSER, TINY DANCER
COUNT THE HEADLIGHTS ON THE HIGHWAY
LAY ME DOWN IN SHEETS OF LINEN
YOU HAD A BUSY DAY TODAYYY
As you can tell, I've been listening to a lot of older songs recently. Lots of Frank Sinatra...now some Elton John...It feels good to expand my musical knowledge...
I'm leaving to Canada in only about...4 days now. I'm going on a cruise, with free wifi, So I may post as usual.
I am so very excited though...
So very...
-Maggie, lover of the old and embracer of the new
July 21, 2014 About....27 hours until go to Canada WOOO
I've been packing all day today, and am "prepared." Or what I belive is prepared.
We're going on a cruise ship, and apparently there are "formal nights"...three of them. It's unbelievable...
I finally get to wear pumps and a ball gown just for the sake of it...wait, im getting forced to? SUWEEEET
Unlike some girls, I have no issue with dressing up. In fact, I think it's an opportunity to give a good first impression. Other times, I don't give a flying...well, nevermind. So either way, I kind of don't look great all the time, so getting a chance to dress to impress is just...cool beans.
The script for the last episode of season nine of Supernatural hidden in Vancouver got found.
AND IM GOING THERE ON ZEG
((btw, zeg means the day after tomorrow. No joke, it's Georgian. It's in a list of "words I want to use more that are foreign."))
-Disappointed fashionista
WORDS I WANT TO USE THAT ARE FOREIGN!! Zeg: the day after tomorrow
Lagom: Not to hot, not to cold...just right
Shemomedjamo: When you're full, but you can't stop eating because what you're eating is so damn good.
Fremdschämen: When you're embarrassed for someone else, because they're too shameless to care
