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General Chat - anything Goes > Jonathan and Kath's Drabble Advent Calendar

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message 1: by Jonathan (last edited Dec 05, 2013 10:33AM) (new)

Jonathan Hill | 1599 comments Each day in the run up to Christmas, a festive 100-word story will be posted - Jonathan Hill and Kath Middleton, authors of the drabble collection, Beyond 100 Drabbles, will take alternate days. Keep your eyes peeled because, on several days, you will have a chance to win a top drabble prize!

December 1st

Zoe's Present by Jonathan Hill

Zoe Wilkes knelt down by the Christmas tree, her fingers itching to open the big parcel that had been there for weeks. Zoe's mum and dad now watched with broad smiles, holding hands in excitement.

Zoe ripped off the paper and looked inside. "But there's nothing here," she gasped.

"Exactly, Zoe. You have your health and a loving family around you, and with those two gifts you need nothing else in the whole wide world."

Peace descended on the Wilkes household. Briefly.

"This is CRAP! Lucinda's parents are getting her a Nintendo DS AND a new saddle for her pony!"



Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments Love it!


message 3: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments They vary a lot Patti. One or two are a bit serious. Yes, you heard it first here. We can be serious. However, we realise that life's too important to take seriously!

We hope people enjoy our bit of fun!


message 4: by David (new)

David Staniforth (davidstaniforth) | 7935 comments Like that one Jonathan. Looking forward to the rest :~)


Simon (Highwayman) (highwayman) | 4276 comments Excellent start!


message 6: by Jonathan (new)

Jonathan Hill | 1599 comments Thanks, Patti and David. :)

As Kath says, there's a good mix of drabbles coming up.


message 7: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments ... and Simon! ;)


message 8: by Kath (last edited Dec 05, 2013 09:25AM) (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments What's behind door number 2? A story by Kath.

I Want

Dear Father Christmas. I want - I beg your pardon. Mum says, "I want never gets." She says I need to learn some manners.
I'll start again.
Dear Father Christmas. I hope you are well. I am very well. Thank you for last year's gifts. They were very nice. Especially the new school uniform which was most useful. How do you feel about bikes? If you could run to a racing bike I would be extremely grateful. I could get a paper round then. It would help with the money. It's been quite tight here since Dad died.
Yours gratefully,
John.



message 9: by Tim (new)

Tim | 8539 comments Like it :)


message 10: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments Thanks Tim! x


message 11: by Katy (new)

Katy | 2662 comments I don't have much experience with drabbles, but I'm really enjoying these (:


message 12: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments Thanks Katy. We're here till Christmas!


message 13: by Jud (new)

Jud (judibud) | 16799 comments That's a lovely one Nanny Igg :o)

I like Jonathans as well of course.


message 14: by B J (new)

B J Burton (bjburton) | 2680 comments Nice one, Kath - a classic drabble starting with a light, humourous touch and then delivering a sharp punch to finish.


message 15: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments Thanks Jud and BJ. Pleased you liked it.


message 16: by Jud (new)

Jud (judibud) | 16799 comments BJ said what I wanted to say but didn't know how to say


Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments Criminy Iggy!

You made me mist up!

That's a wondrous thing to do with only 100 words.

Sheesh


message 18: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments Thanks Patti. It worked then. :)


message 19: by David (new)

David Staniforth (davidstaniforth) | 7935 comments Liked it. And as I've already said on another thread, very poignant.


Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments I think you've found your calling, young lady.


message 21: by Jonathan (new)

Jonathan Hill | 1599 comments It's an excellent drabble and I'm pleased others think the same. It's moving but not syrupy.


message 22: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments If you keep calling me young lady - you're my best mate, you are! ;)


Simon (Highwayman) (highwayman) | 4276 comments Setting a high standard.


Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments Ignite wrote: "If you keep calling me young lady - you're my best mate, you are! ;)"

Awwwwww.

Gimme cake and I'll call you an adolescent. :)


Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments Jonathan wrote: "It's an excellent drabble and I'm pleased others think the same. It's moving but not syrupy."

Certainly not syrupy.

What's the opposite of syrup?
Vinegar?
Something sharp, anyway.

Just reread it. Same reaction.
Yep, damn good word wrangling, that.


message 26: by Philip (sarah) (new)

Philip (sarah) Willis | 4630 comments What a terrific idea, Love it!
Two great wee stories, 22 more to look forward to and not a calorie in sight.
Thank you so much Jonathan and Ignite!


message 27: by Jonathan (new)

Jonathan Hill | 1599 comments You're welcome, Sarah! 23 more as there's one for the big day too! :)


message 28: by Kath (last edited Dec 05, 2013 09:26AM) (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments Day 3 and Jonathan provides the treat behind the door.

Roasting On An Open Fire

Months of suspicion came to a head for Justine on Christmas Eve when Geoff came home with lipstick on his collar. What a cliché! But there it was, beneath the fog of alcohol he was exhaling. Justine greeted her husband pleasantly enough. She allowed him to change, and when he came downstairs, she stabbed him several times with the knife that had been set aside to carve the turkey. It’ll be a silent night, she thought later on, as she turned the toasting fork in the fire. Its prongs held two shrivelled-looking things. Geoff’s nuts roasting on an open fire.



message 29: by B J (new)

B J Burton (bjburton) | 2680 comments Great. My turn to open the advent calendar. Aaagh! Now I'm sitting with crossed legs wishing I hadn't.
Nice one, Jonathan.


Gingerlily - The Full Wild | 34228 comments Just wait until Geoff reads it!


message 31: by Jud (new)

Jud (judibud) | 16799 comments He had it coming, he had it coming, he only had himself to blame. If you'da been there, if you'da seen it! I betcha you would have done the same!


message 32: by Jim (new)

Jim | 21809 comments It's interesting how times and standards change. If you were to re-write that and post it to facebook with a man killing and mutilating his wife for a suspicion of adultery I suspect there'd be a howl of protest

It might just be an interesting experiment :-)


message 33: by Jud (new)

Jud (judibud) | 16799 comments It's simple Jim, when men cheat it's their fault, clearly they are mean and selfish and uncaring but when a woman cheats it's because the man is mean and selfish and uncaring.


message 34: by B J (new)

B J Burton (bjburton) | 2680 comments I'm pretty sure that's covered in the National Curriculum - in girls' schools anyway.


message 35: by B J (new)

B J Burton (bjburton) | 2680 comments I'm struggling to think of a Christmas-flavoured, reverse-gender play on words that is anywhere near as good as 'Geoff's nuts roasting on an open fire'. I've got as far as 'slay Belle' and ground to a halt. Probably just as well.


Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments I gotta tell Geoff to read this.

And yes Jim. If the genders had been reversed I'd have been affronted.

This, however, is funny!


message 37: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments But you can quite see why I'm nice to Jonathan - with ideas like that sluicing out of his keyboard?


Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments Yes. His imp can really freak me out.


message 39: by Jonathan (new)

Jonathan Hill | 1599 comments Haha, glad this drabble is provoking a bit of debate! :)

Patti, I believe the Imp is Michael's invention! ;)


message 40: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments Jonathan can be nasty all by himself.
Did I say that out loud?


Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments Whoops.

I'm seriously brain dead today.


message 42: by Kath (last edited Dec 05, 2013 09:26AM) (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments What's behind the door on Day Four? A Kath story.

The Fairy Moot

On Midsummer's Eve, the fairies meet for their annual get together. The flower fairies are the easiest to distinguish. The Rose Fairy dresses in rose petals with a little petal cap and the Bluebell Fairy wears blue petals and a thimble shaped flower on her head.
There's another, more practical kind of fairy. She will carry a rope ladder for bedroom windows and a small sack to collect teeth. But after a December spent parked on a fir tree with her knickers full of pine needles, you can tell a Christmas Fairy because she's the one who can't sit down.



message 43: by Jim (new)

Jim | 21809 comments love it


message 44: by B J (new)

B J Burton (bjburton) | 2680 comments One can't beat a good moot.


message 45: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments I'll say! Where else would you meet?


message 46: by B J (new)

B J Burton (bjburton) | 2680 comments Anywhere but the top of a Christmas tree!


message 47: by Jud (new)

Jud (judibud) | 16799 comments Ha!

Brilliant :o) Poor Christmas Fairy


message 48: by Kath (new)

Kath Middleton | 23860 comments She seems to have piles - of sympathy!


message 49: by Jud (new)

Jud (judibud) | 16799 comments Oi, leave my piles out of it


Patti (baconater) (goldengreene) | 56525 comments Awwwww


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