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Wayne
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May 14, 2013 06:23PM

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Perhaps you should publish your teenage angst and make your fortune, Wayne. I understand teenage angst goes down great with teenagers.

I am so very glad that the internet didn't exist when I was a teenager. Otherwise, someone might be able to go dig some of that older stuff up.
I pity today's 16 year olds when they grow up, have children, and their kids go online and search for their parents' names..."Hey, Dad! I found those stories you wrote and posted on Wattpad when you were my age..."

I started writing funny plays and stuff while I was in elementary school. Journal writing however awaited my first crush.
Matt, that sounds like a great YA/Romance/New Romance type story. Add in some zombies or maybe blingy shiny I drink the blood of animals vampires and you will run laughing maniacally to the bank with lots and lots of money.
I actually published my teen novel. A publisher I owed a favor -- she made me many very effective introductions -- had a hole in her schedule when a drunken writer burned his manuscript a week before he was supposed to deliver it. She asked me what I had in my bottom drawer that I could knock into shape in two weeks max. Even in that rush we retained just enough sense to put a pseudonym on it. The critics were kind, fortunately.

I haven't made much progress since...
Kench.
I handled the handwritten original manuscript of my first novel when we settled in Ireland and stuff arrived in steamer trunks from all round the world. Once was enough. What was good: fresh, strong prose, brilliant ideas, sensitive handling of the love threads, my handwriting was still readable, perhaps for the last time in my life. What was not so good: overwritten, fractured structures (that's a killer for me as a reader -- there's a right way and a wrong way to tell any story), dialect in a couple of places, little details that as an editor would cause me to tell the writer to go out and live a little (and stop reading Hemingway!) before he imposes on my time again. The published book is a lot better: in the retyping I also rewrote it, and I had superb editorial staff of my own choice giving me their full attention because this was the lead title of a small provincial publisher. (A lesson I didn't forget: later, when I published with metropolitan big names, where my "editor" was a dealmaker who would read ten pages of my book, or sometime not even that much, I had it written into my contracts that my book would copyedited by and outsider of my choice.) That my teenage novel turned into a reasonable seller was probably due as much to the steady hand of the experienced editors as to the 12 or 15 years of extra experience I had.
All the same, the experience put me off rush jobs in novels forever. I like letting a novel gestate for a few years, a decade or two, and ebooks have proved me perfectly right. Most of the crap we see wouldn't be published if people stopped and thought before they hit SEND.
I handled the handwritten original manuscript of my first novel when we settled in Ireland and stuff arrived in steamer trunks from all round the world. Once was enough. What was good: fresh, strong prose, brilliant ideas, sensitive handling of the love threads, my handwriting was still readable, perhaps for the last time in my life. What was not so good: overwritten, fractured structures (that's a killer for me as a reader -- there's a right way and a wrong way to tell any story), dialect in a couple of places, little details that as an editor would cause me to tell the writer to go out and live a little (and stop reading Hemingway!) before he imposes on my time again. The published book is a lot better: in the retyping I also rewrote it, and I had superb editorial staff of my own choice giving me their full attention because this was the lead title of a small provincial publisher. (A lesson I didn't forget: later, when I published with metropolitan big names, where my "editor" was a dealmaker who would read ten pages of my book, or sometime not even that much, I had it written into my contracts that my book would copyedited by and outsider of my choice.) That my teenage novel turned into a reasonable seller was probably due as much to the steady hand of the experienced editors as to the 12 or 15 years of extra experience I had.
All the same, the experience put me off rush jobs in novels forever. I like letting a novel gestate for a few years, a decade or two, and ebooks have proved me perfectly right. Most of the crap we see wouldn't be published if people stopped and thought before they hit SEND.

I don't live in the city of Cork; I live in County Cork, in a country town. There's not much point for a writer, once he's established, unless he wants to be mainly a talking head on television, to live in the city if he can afford to live in the country.
The people are amazingly friendly, and the country is beautiful. Ireland is a fabulous place to visit, for those smart enough to give the obvious tourist hotspots a miss. I was in Killarney only overnight, and God, it was a misery, not like I remember it at all from when I first went there.
The people are amazingly friendly, and the country is beautiful. Ireland is a fabulous place to visit, for those smart enough to give the obvious tourist hotspots a miss. I was in Killarney only overnight, and God, it was a misery, not like I remember it at all from when I first went there.
I saw bats in Texas drinking the blood of cows. They'd rasp through near the cow's ankle and then lick (1) the blood that came out. Forgot now what cute little creatures (certainly nicer than the vampires in the books of several authors I can name) are called, but they were velvety black, except where blood had dried on them, where they were a bit sticky.
(1) The autospeller in my Mac first gave me "like" in this position, as if these vampire bats -- thanks Claudine! -- are on Facebook.
(1) The autospeller in my Mac first gave me "like" in this position, as if these vampire bats -- thanks Claudine! -- are on Facebook.
They are called vampire bats Andre. My kids watched a programme on one of the animal planet or nat geo channels about them. My daughter wasn't impressed and since we had a colony of bats fly over the house most nights in Pretoria, she'd religiously try and protect the dog just in case...
I've always wanted to visit Ireland. And Scotland. Not England though. My kids don't want to visit, just in case they have to listen to bagpipes. Again.
The only writing I have ever done is on my blog, which reminds me I need to update it.
I've always wanted to visit Ireland. And Scotland. Not England though. My kids don't want to visit, just in case they have to listen to bagpipes. Again.
The only writing I have ever done is on my blog, which reminds me I need to update it.
Claudine wrote: "They are called vampire bats Andre. My kids watched a programme on one of the animal planet or nat geo channels about them. My daughter wasn't impressed and since we had a colony of bats fly over..."
That probably makes me the only writer who has ever held a vampire in his hands.
You don't want to come to Ireland right now. Our summer is like a Cape winter, cold, wet, with the Doctor transposed to winter to perfect the misery. July and August are the best months.
That probably makes me the only writer who has ever held a vampire in his hands.
You don't want to come to Ireland right now. Our summer is like a Cape winter, cold, wet, with the Doctor transposed to winter to perfect the misery. July and August are the best months.
I love the Cape winters though. I've had enough of the Joburg winters. I miss the wind too. Call me an idiot, it's ok. Everyone I know thinks I'm nuts. I don't want to visit anywhere in Europe during the winter though.
It's romantic walking hand in hand under the oak trees in the rain -- until the first cold drop rolls down your neck...