Why the extreme double standard, always??

[Cassie]

This book, along with a huge cluster of books written recently, are starting to really irritate me. In all of them, the heroine is innocent, either a virgin or close to it, and the supposed hero is this huge player who has slept his way through the city.

Even, like in this book, when they were childhood friends/lovers and the hero made the heroine promise to never let anyone else touch her (even after he disappears on her for eight years, she never dates anyone), in the meantime the man is off having sex with a hundred other women. What??

Why this extreme double standard? Why can't the man have not slept around either, especially after those promises? Or why can't the man just have had one or two serious relationships that made it to the bedroom? Why can't they both be more innocent or both be more slutty? Why does the term alpha man have to be synonymous with player?

I guess I am just sick of all the man-whores, especially the ones who are still sleeping with other women after they have met their HEA woman. Any one else feel this way?

[Beverly]

Oh my god, I've been reading all the reviews trying to find just what you're asking.

I haven't read the book yet, but I kept on seeing that quote where Leo has Evie promise that she'll save herself for him. So I'm assuming that because he made her promise that, that he'll do the same for her and save himself for her. So I'm looking through all the reviews and none of them are saying anything, but now you've just confirmed it.

Did he really sleep with a ton of women??

If he did, I won't read this book. I hate the double standard too, especially since they seem to be emphasizing it so much in this book. I just hate it so much.

I think they make the men players so they can seem experienced and so they can show that the main female is the one for him. To show that sex with her is worth more than the rest. As for the girls, I think they do it so they can show that they only trust that one guy and only he'll be able to fully have her. But really?? She didn't even date??

That whole double standard just makes the story's premise seem like such a waste. The whole point is that they're waiting for each other. Did he at least explain why he slept with other women??

[Maja]

Beverly wrote: "Oh my god, I've been reading all the reviews trying to find just what you're asking.

I haven't read the book yet, but I kept on seeing that quote where Leo has Evie promise that she'll save herse..."

He did explain it in the book, and the reason was okay, if you look at other reasons from other books, like "thoughtless". But still i hate the double standard in this book too, and it's really annoying, but Jake doesn't have sex with other women though in the book, since he comes into the story.

[Elaine]

@cassie, I was beginning to think I'd have to go away and hide for a few weeks as all my friends loved this story lol.
I felt exactly the same. I started to read Leo and it was like all the stories I'd read over the last year in this one book. That is to some readers the best thing out, but a year on from FSOG without the BDSM, I was hoping for something more refreshing.
I story was filled up with what she had for breakfast, dinner what bubble bath she used and full description on every outfit worn.
Leo stalks her and she doesn't think that's wrong. ...come on
Virgin..again, rich millionaire own business...

Rant over!!

[Cassie]

Elaine wrote: "@cassie, I was beginning to think I'd have to go away and hide for a few weeks as all my friends loved this story lol.
I felt exactly the same. I started to read Leo and it was like all the storie..."

Yes, this book definitely had a similar premise to a hundred other books over the last couple years, some published before FSOG, some after. I don't hate that plot, but I am tired of reading it now. Especially since all the naive, innocent, waiting for true love girls that I know are not likely to even meet, much less fall in love with a rich, dominant, slept-with-a-thousand-woman guy.

[Jenny]

While I have not read Leo, I was tempted to buy it last night but for the virgin aspect (AGAIN!) I didn't.

I am sooooooooooooo sick of the chicks being virgins. SICK of it! I mean why not explore some slutty gals, or single moms, or even chicks that lost it early and then decided to wait. There are so many other forms of sexual experience that authors could explore . . . I wish they would.

The man-whores are also getting a bit old, and millionaires. But I get they work . . . so they aren't going to "die".

[Cassie]

I am so glad other people share my pain with this!

[Melannie]

I read the book and loved the actual story! he does explain why he endure a high sex activity and she does explain why she was still a virgin! I do believe writers need to get our of there comfort cliché zone! maybe that will be my book! keep giving me ideas!!! lol

But again, In this particular story I was glad she was a virgin or at least not a slut, because in the story her background is pretty intense, if you look at it in real life, it is expected that girls with Evie's background end up been very promiscuous or knocked up, or living the street life!!! and I can understand and appreciate that in this story!!! I can also understand why Leo/Jake had the man-whore life he had!! Other stories like FSOG, where she doesn't have any traumatic reason to be a virgin and turns out she was beautiful and didn't know it, those are a whole different thing!

[Neon]

Absolutely, girl is innocent, meek, submissive, without any self respect, he is handsome so she is just glad that he wants her so she feels she is just lucky that he noticed her, they are virgins or very minute sex experience and the guy want her and that's it... hey i forgot they are young, and and they listen to guys as if they are mentally retarded. writers should make note that these books are mostly read by females and i don't think many females will be fine with that kind of image. I got so irritated reading 50 shades that i want to kill that B****.


I actually liked the story line of Leo but the above said reason are in that books so i skipped most of the pages. It was a very nice story if only the writer dint get influenced by '50 Shades' or 'Bared to You' this would have been a very very good book.

[Abadak]

I just love Miranda she is NOT naive,innocent or waiting for true love... she is strong, single mom and completly different from Eve from Leo.

Don't get me wrong I really like the message and storyline from Leo but if you are tired of this type of girls, understandable.

Read: Folding Hearts this is BOOK 2 of a SERIES. Miranda is in a passage at the end of book 1......

Hope you all like slutty and strong Miranda.

[Lori]

Yes I felt that way cassie.
I wanted evie to have broken the promise too.
It's always the man what's the whore isn't it? even though I loved Leo he had no right to expect her to still be a virgin.
Also the women always have to get on with being one of many dont they? They always meet some of their conquests aswell(and they are usually are the top bitch too)...
Oh dear I'm afraid I'm ranting now haha.
But did Love the 2 books though
Xx

[Beverly]

What did Leo say in regards to her still being a virgin after all that time?

@Lori, I hate that too! For some reason, an old lover/conquest will turn up and they'll be described as being beyond beautiful and bitchy. Can't a girl be a slut and still be a good person? Why does she have to be mean and spiteful?

You know what else sucks? When the couple is separated for a while (divorce, estrangement, misunderstanding, etc) and she'll not have sex with anyone during their separation, but he'll have had sex with a ton of women. This is also just a general thing that happens when a girl is not a virgin, like, if she hasn't been with a man for five years, she will not have had sex during those years. Why does the women have to remain "pure"? Why is the man excused for his behavior??

ie: Second Time Around, Friend-zoned, Epilogue, The Proposal, Shine Not Burn, Rule

I've read very few books that have a female who has slept around like a man-whore. These were pretty good: Addicted to You, Beautiful Broken Rules, The Trouble with Tomboys


I just...why are there so many 20-something year old virgins in books?!

[Isobel]

And so say all of us! That's exactly what prompted me to write my own book.

[Maja]

Livi wrote: "And so say all of us! That's exactly what prompted me to write my own book."

What is your book called? :)

[Isobel]

Maja44 wrote: "Livi wrote: "And so say all of us! That's exactly what prompted me to write my own book."

What is your book called? :)"

I promise I wasn't looking for a free plug! It's called What goes around comes around - by O.C Shaw. I was genuinely tired of reading about all the impossibly beautiful young virgins! Just wrote it to please myself really, but fortunately some others seem to have liked it too.

[Maja]

Livi wrote: "Maja44 wrote: "Livi wrote: "And so say all of us! That's exactly what prompted me to write my own book."

What is your book called? :)"

I promise I wasn't looking for a free plug! It's called W..."

It's totally okay, also really curious, because I'm so damn tired of those damn virgins. I wrote my own books too, started with the first many years ago, because I wasn't happy with any other books, they weren't perfect for me.

[Isobel]

Maja44 wrote: "Livi wrote: "Maja44 wrote: "Livi wrote: "And so say all of us! That's exactly what prompted me to write my own book."

What is your book called? :)"

I promise I wasn't looking for a free plug! ..."

What are they? I'll look them up

[Maja]

They're not published or anything and I wrote them on my native language, so you probably won't understand them :p

[S.K.]

I've recently done the virgin vs player thing but in my defence, I'd been out of the loop for awhile and didn't realise it was a 'thing'! Now I feel guilty for perpetuating a stereotype!
However my player reforms straight away and my virgin was obligated to a mythic race and goes on and gets it on anyway when she feels like it ;)

[Isobel]

S.K. wrote: "I've recently done the virgin vs player thing but in my defence, I'd been out of the loop for awhile and didn't realise it was a 'thing'! Now I feel guilty for perpetuating a stereotype!
However my..."

It's a really popular genre - don't apologise. It's good to mix it up a bit though, I find there are only so many twenty year old virgins I can cope with!

[S.K.]

Ahhh mine is 28, a mermaid queen saved for a marriage that never eventuates because the men she is betrothed to keep dying, and she suffers from the feminine equivalent of blue balls.
What is that anyway? Is there a term for that because there should be!

[Maja]

S.K. wrote: "Ahhh mine is 28, a mermaid queen saved for a marriage that never eventuates because the men she is betrothed to keep dying, and she suffers from the feminine equivalent of blue balls.
What is that ..."

Wow, I think I have to check your book out because of blue balls!

[Isobel]

I think we may have to create a new term, just for women. I'll get on it!

[Deborah]

As for the virgin vs. the player....it's the appeal of opposites, I think. It really doesn't bother me. In Mia Sheridan's "Archer's Voice" the hero is a virgin, so you might want to check that out. It's an excellent book, I think.
As an author of published novels, I give some thought to how much sexual experience my characters will have. In some books, it isn't an issue, and in others, it is. Men go through "growth stages" just like women. Sometimes this means they have a period of time when they are more interested in having sex than in having relationships. Later, they might look back on that time with regret or maybe even begin realizing that the shallowness of it isn't what they want now in their lives. I think it all makes for interesting personalities.

[Isobel]

Yeah I've read some great reviews of that book - definitely on my to be read list

[Michelle °O°]

I don't think this is a new trend. I have been reading historical romances for a long time and even then most of the characters were players.

What I think it comes down to women want to be the one to tame the "bad boy player" and love to read about it.

However in this book I couldn't hold it against Leo because there were certain situations in his life after getting adopted that led him not to keep his vow.

[Deborah]

I totally agree, Michelle! Good observation.

[Jo]

felt sad about Leo, looking forward a new life in a new place/ home but what he got.... sexual abuse by his stepmom....

i can understnad why he had traffice accident, if i was him, i did that too but i am not the one who has courage

[JewelsyGoolsy]

I normally hate those types of virgin-tames-manwhore stories unless it has a credible and interesting plot behind it. I especially dislike when there's no real reason aside from lust (or what others call insta-love) for the manwhore to be perusing the virgin so passionately.
Leo & Evie however, knew each other growing up through the foster are system and have loved each other for as kids and teenagers. He asked her to save herself for him because he had all intentions to do the same, until a horrible circumstance changed his whole personality and outlook on life. He started manwhoring cos he already gave up all hope of being with Evie until he had an accident. I guess Evie was a pretty cliche, sweet virgin but I liked that the author made her a poor, cleaning maid instead of the "virgin college intern" which at least backs up that she was too busy making ends meet to go dating and having sex.
A lot of Leo's reasoning is explain in his POV book.

[Barbara]

Cassie wrote: "This book, along with a huge cluster of books written recently, are starting to really irritate me. In all of them, the heroine is innocent, either a virgin or close to it, and the supposed hero is..."

I totally agree. I actually like a book more if the guy keeps it in his pants or they are both sluts. The double standard stuff is bullshit.

[Beverly]

I have to disagree with Michelle. In historical books the men tend to be players and the women virgins because, generally in history, this was accurate. Women were told to be chaste and men were told to get around.

However this recent trend is usually in new adult books in which the protagonists are in their early twenties and to still have this type of manslut/virgin heroine mentality is somewhat backward thinking. In fact, many times when a girl is known to sleep around she comes off as bitchy, dumb, or evil and the guy, usually the hero, is never seen badly despite having the same reputation. It's because the heroine is a virgin that she is viewed so highly by the hero. A lot of times they refer to them as "innocent" which is kind of an insult.

I've read a lot of NA books and they all tend to be like this so I've stopped reading them. In fact, Young adult books treat the issue more fairly and adult books are more mature and realistic about these situations so I prefer those to new adult.

I don't like this trend. I agree with Barbara.

[Michelle °O°]

I personally don't have a problem with this (the virginal heroine) , but I just read a great series that the Heroine was very sexually active, in fact she was a sex addict. If you haven't read the Addictive Series I highly recommend it. Addicted to You

[Joy]

Cassie wrote: "This book, along with a huge cluster of books written recently, are starting to really irritate me. In all of them, the heroine is innocent, either a virgin or close to it, and the supposed hero is..."

Cassie wrote: "This book, along with a huge cluster of books written recently, are starting to really irritate me. In all of them, the heroine is innocent, either a virgin or close to it, and the supposed hero is..."

OMG! You mean there are others who think like me out in this big wide world of double standards? I've been sick to death of them for YEARS and now I do what I can to avoid them like reading reviews first or searching for posts like this, so no, despite the many occalades I will not be reading Leo now thank you but I am loving Grayson's Vow. I read a book some time ago, name escapes me right now but she was more of a player than he was I could not believe what I was reading so I read it again for the sheer novelty, me who never reads a book twice. Edited to say: when this couple parted she played on him too and I felt the biggest thrill of satisfaction. Hmmm must go find that book and read it again.

[Michelle °O°]

Joy wrote: OMG! You mean there are others who think like me out in this big wide world of double standards? I've been sick to death of them for YEARS and now I do what I can to avoid them like reading reviews first or searching for posts like this, so no, despite the many occalades I will not be reading Leo now thank you but I am loving Grayson's Vow...."

Leo's is different than the traditional Virgin Hero. There were circumstances that happened in Leo's life. It was really a great read. (Not as great as Archer's Voice but nothing is that great!)

LOL at Grayson's Vow. I actually disliked that entire story :(

[Luv]

Jenny wrote: "While I have not read Leo, I was tempted to buy it last night but for the virgin aspect (AGAIN!) I didn't.

I am sooooooooooooo sick of the chicks being virgins. SICK of it! I mean why not explore..."

I agree with your comment. I just read a book yesterday that had a reformed slutty h and a manwhore H as the lead characters. It was a wonderful change of pace from the typical YA dreck out on the market. The book was Loved by My Cowboy by Brooke May. I wish more authors would write realistic characters instead of the virginal h lead characters. I'm not a big fan of YA books anyway. With Mia's book sale I decided to take the recommendation of an Amazon forum poster and read Leo using KU. It was the typical YA and I passed on buying Leo or reading more by this author.