*A Desk is a Dangerous Place...* (about my novel and myself)

[Lara]

I’d like to begin by saying that my location is in East Europe, my profession is in linguistics, my primary field is Russian language and literature; my secondary emphasis is history and English language. This might be an appropriate point to apologize for my English; my excuse is that it is my second language, as the reader can understand reading my stories, and I fear that I've never quite mastered it as I should.
I am a freelance writer. My given name has several derivatives and diminutives that I use as my pen-names. My first novel with a working title of La Lune Blanche is adult fiction. As my reader knows, my beloved main adult character Anthony Blanche is a namesake of the charming character from Evelyn Waugh’s novel which is not a mere coincidence; it’s happened, because reading the novel I got obsessed with this name. It gave me a creative impulse one day--it was great actuation--and I still feel thankful to it. The obsession helped and it still helps me to keep on creating. In 2005, the year when I first brought my novel to everybody’s notice on the Net, I exchanged e-mails with one poet from the UK, who said by the way that “words are like beautiful marble statues” for him. In reply, I said that words are like a doping for me. And with the doping of the name of Anthony Blanche I have lived since 2003, when I first heard of the name. On one website, dedicated to the novel Brideshead Revisited, Evelyn Waugh’s Anthony Blanche was called “nasty” (which is odd). Anthony Blanche from my book is yet “nastier”, but I love my dear main character, because he is nice to me, his poet, nice by permitting me to care about his enjoyments in the cozy world of my novel. No, he is not my second self. I am not cruel like he; I dislike hurting. If I hurt somebody’s feelings, then it’s my clumsiness and not my intention. And he is never clumsy. I am a lifelong water-drinker, and he loves fine wines. But both of us are non-smokers, loving rainy weather, eroto-maniacs in a way, bourgeois, sober-minded, loving beautiful boys, youths and men, having much against narcotics, and devoted to the beautiful pagan religion. In the first volume of my novel as well as in the following volumes, there are novelettes and several imaginative poems written by Anthony Blanche. Those suggestive novelettes are about male love too. I’d love the book to be published and read, because it’s my firm belief that the stories written by my dear main character are not bad at all.
There is one more reason why I began writing my novel, controversial and exceptionable as some believe. Reading some gay-themed books years back, I felt unsatisfied, and I decided to write my own gay-themed story to show what I love in this genre. To show my preference, no more. I only show my aesthetic tastes and my imagery, but I don’t teach, far from it. My novel is a beautiful adult fiction, a fairy tale for adults, an erotic story, a love story, a bluest fable, literature of literature. “The Ageless Man’s nice diary of pleasure. Man has no age. His pleasure has no measure.” If the translation seems an incondite work, that’s right in a way. Although the novel was published on lulu.com some time ago, but I continue improving the translation, editing some annoying misprints, probable stylistic errors of the novelese and so forth.
I am not interested in homosexual relationship; I don’t study this great and burning theme. I am only a gay-admirer, who enjoys reading about male love, just enjoys, no more. That’s my fetish.
Publish me, please, publish me! I love my book so much; I love myself so much… Publish me! Read me! Criticize me! Being aware of all the defects of my writings I can reply to any critique.
In Full Career, With the Blessings of…