David > David's Quotes

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#1

“Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.”
― Benjamin Franklin Wade

tags: humor, misattributed-mark-twain, philosophy, theology

19855 likes

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#2

“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”
― Mark Twain

tags: lies, lying, memory, truth

92259 likes

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#3

“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
― H. Jackson Brown Jr., P.S. I Love You

tags: actions, disappointed, disappointment, dream, dreams, explore, misattributed-mark-twain, sail

60297 likes

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#4

“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
― Mark Twain

34472 likes

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#5

“Whenever you find yourself on the side of the majority, it is time to reform (or pause and reflect).”
― Mark Twain

tags: individuality, majority, minority, pause, reflect, wisdom

43916 likes

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#6

“The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.”
― Mark Twain

tags: aliteracy, attributed-no-source, literacy

41020 likes

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#7

“I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.”
― Mark Twain

tags: attributed-no-source, education

18239 likes

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#8

“A lie can travel half way around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes.”
― Mark Twain

tags: misattributed-mark-twain, truth

16299 likes

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#9

“Be careful about reading health books. Some fine day you'll die of a misprint.”
― Markus Herz

tags: books, health, humor, misattributed-mark-twain, misprints

13741 likes

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#10

“The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.”
― Mark Twain

tags: death, life

16771 likes

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#11

“′Classic′ - a book which people praise and don't read.”
― Mark Twain

tags: books, classic, reading

18873 likes

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#12

“Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor, politics

9105 likes

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#13

“In a good bookroom you feel in some mysterious way that you are absorbing the wisdom contained in all the books through your skin, without even opening them.”
― Mark Twain

tags: bookroom, books, libraries, wisdom

10425 likes

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#14

“Substitute 'damn' every time you're inclined to write 'very;' your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor, writing

9632 likes

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#15

“But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor-satan

6212 likes

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#16

“I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor, knowledge

6887 likes

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#17

“Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.”
― Mark Twain

tags: patriotism, politics

6010 likes

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#18

“Truth is stranger than fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn't.”
― Mark Twain, Following the Equator: A Journey Around the World

tags: books, truth

6040 likes

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#19

“God created war so that Americans would learn geography.”
― Mark Twain

tags: americans, geography, war

7534 likes

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#20

“Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.”
― Mark Twain

tags: illusions, life

4032 likes

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#21

“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
― Mark Twain

tags: classic-insult, funeral, funny, humor

7634 likes

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#22

“Always do what is right. It will gratify half of mankind and astound the other.”
― Mark Twain

tags: morals

3399 likes

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#23

“The trouble is not in dying for a friend, but in finding a friend worth dying for.”
― Mark Twain

3221 likes

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#24

“If you don't read the newspaper, you're uninformed. If you read the newspaper, you're mis-informed.”
― Mark Twain

tags: misattributed-mark-twain, newspapers

3563 likes

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#25

“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.”
― Mark Twain

3660 likes

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#26

“What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor, men, women

4699 likes

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#27

“Never allow someone to be your priority while allowing yourself to be their option.”
― Mark Twain

tags: heartbreak

6896 likes

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#28

“You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?”
― Mark Twain

tags: books-bible

2557 likes

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#29

“Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear.”
― Mark Twain

tags: courage

3359 likes

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#30

“The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor, philosophy, religion

2509 likes

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