Michael Conrad > Michael's Quotes

“people seem to be getting dumber and dumber. You know, I mean we have all this amazing technology and yet computers have turned into basically four figure wank machines. The internet was supposed to set us free, democratize us, but all it's really given us is Howard Dean's aborted candidacy and 24 hour a day access to kiddie porn. People... they don't write anymore, they blog. Instead of talking, they text, no punctuation, no grammar: LOL this and LMFAO that. You know, it just seems to me it's just a bunch of stupid people pseudo-communicating with a bunch of other stupid people at a proto-language that resembles more what cavemen used to speak than the King's English.”
― Hank Moody

“A morning of awkwardness is far better then a night of loneliness”
― Hank Moody

“You know why love stories have happy endings?” I shake my head.
“Because they end too early,” she continues. “They always end right at the kiss. You never have to see all the bullshit that comes later. You know, Life.”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“She said one thing and I said another and the next thing I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life in the middle of that conversation.”
― Hank Moody

“Good morning, Hell-A. In the land of the lotus-eaters, time plays tricks on you. One day you’re dreaming, the next, your dream has become your reality. It was the best of times. If only someone had told me. Mistakes were made, hearts were broken, harsh lessons learned. My family goes on without me, while I drown in a sea of pointless pussy. I don’t know how I got here. But here I am, rotting away in the warm California sun. There are things I need to figure out, for her sake, at least. The clock is ticking. The gap is widening. She won’t always love me “no matter what”
― Hank Moody

“When it comes to emotions, women know how to paint with the full set of oils, while men are busy doodling with crayons.”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“The person that I want to have everything to do with, wants nothing to do with me.”
― Hank Moody

“Get it in while you can. It'll all be gone soon enough.”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“I pop a cassette into the Buick's stereo. It's the Ramones. I turn the volume up high and roll down the windows. The highway air tastes of fumes, but it still feels goddamn good to breathe”
― Hank Moody, God Hates Us All

“Don’t tell me what to feel. All my fucking life, people have been telling me I do things wrong. I’m always the fucking asshole. I look around and I see everybody else is infinitely more fucked up than I am.”
― Hank Moody

“How can you be so fucking beautiful and so fucking wrong?”
― Hank Moody

“All those things that werent supposed to happen? They happened. What happens next is up to you.”
― Hank Moody

“I google myself but I never cheated on you. Never.”
― Hank Moody

“Cities don’t change people. People don’t even change people. We are who we are.”
― Hank Moody