Quotes - Mike (Jacksonville, FL) Showing 1-30 of 41

#1

“All God does is watch us and kill us when we get boring. We must never, ever be boring.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

tags: god, humor, life

11623 likes

#2

“The one you love and the one who loves you are never, ever the same person.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

tags: life, love

13994 likes

#3

“It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

tags: loss

9424 likes

#4

“We all die. The goal isn't to live forever, the goal is to create something that will.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Diary

9209 likes

#5

“What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention. Somebody addicted to me. A mutual addiction.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Choke

tags: love

6160 likes

#6

“You know how they say you only hurt the ones you love? Well, it works both ways.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

tags: love

3044 likes

#7

“When did the future switch from being a promise to being a threat?”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

tags: future

1908 likes

#8

“If you love something set it free, but don't be surprised if it comes back with herpes.”
― Chuck Palahniuk

tags: humor, love

2282 likes

#9

“If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character...Would you slow down? Or speed up?”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

tags: death

2707 likes

#10

“No matter how much you think you love somebody, you'll step back when the pool of their blood edges up too close.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

tags: love

1562 likes

#11

“We'll never be as young as we are tonight.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Rant: An Oral Biography of Buster Casey

tags: youth-age

1293 likes

#12

“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”
― Mark Twain

tags: lies, lying, memory, truth

92313 likes

#13

“The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read.”
― Mark Twain

tags: aliteracy, attributed-no-source, literacy

41035 likes

#14

“Go to heaven for the climate and hell for the company.”
― Benjamin Franklin Wade

tags: humor, misattributed-mark-twain, philosophy, theology

19859 likes

#15

“I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.”
― Mark Twain

tags: attributed-no-source, education

18241 likes

#16

“′Classic′ - a book which people praise and don't read.”
― Mark Twain

tags: books, classic, reading

18873 likes

#17

“Reader, suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But I repeat myself.”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor, politics

9110 likes

#18

“Don’t go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.”
― Mark Twain

tags: living, world

8295 likes

#19

“But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor-satan

6213 likes

#20

“I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn’t know.”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor, knowledge

6889 likes

#21

“God created war so that Americans would learn geography.”
― Mark Twain

tags: americans, geography, war

7541 likes

#22

“I did not attend his funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.”
― Mark Twain

tags: classic-insult, funeral, funny, humor

7633 likes

#23

“Loyalty to country ALWAYS. Loyalty to government, when it deserves it.”
― Mark Twain

tags: patriotism, politics

6013 likes

#24

“What would men be without women? Scarce, sir...mighty scarce.”
― Mark Twain

tags: humor, men, women

4699 likes

#25

“You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?”
― Mark Twain

tags: books-bible

2559 likes

#26

“Have your adventures, make your mistakes, and choose your friends poorly -- all these make for great stories.”
― Chuck Palahniuk

1551 likes

#27

“The only difference between a suicide and a martyrdom really is the amount of press coverage.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Survivor

tags: martyrdom, suicide

1183 likes

#28

“In a world where billions believe their deity conceived a mortal child with a virgin human, it's stunning how little imagination most people display.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Rant: An Oral Biography of Buster Casey

975 likes

#29

“The only reason why we ask other people how their weekend was is so we can tell them about our own weekend.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters

tags: conversation, human-nature, weekend

1026 likes

#30

“The lower you fall, the higher you'll fly.”
― Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club

924 likes

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