Matthew Grendell > Matthew's Quotes

“Let us find the dam snack bar," Zoe said. "We should eat while we can."
Grover cracked a smile. "The dam snack bar?"
Zoe blinked. "Yes. What is funny?"
"Nothing," Grover said, trying to keep a straight face. "I could use some dam french fries."
Even Thalia smiled at that. "And I need to use the dam restroom."
...
I started cracking up, and Thalia and Grover joined in, while Zoe just looked at me. "I do not understand."
"I want to use the dam water fountain," Grover said.
"And..." Thalia tried to catch her breath. "I want to buy a dam t-shirt.”
― Rick Riordan, The Titan’s Curse

“Grover was sniffing the wind, looking nervous. He fished out his acorns and threw them into the sand, then played his pipes. They rearranged themselves in a pattern that made no sense to me, but Grover looked concerned.
"That's us," he said. "Those five nuts right there."
"Which one is me?" I asked.
"The little deformed one," Zoe suggested.
"Oh, shut up.”
― Rick Riordan, The Titan’s Curse

“You deal with mythological stuff for a few years, you learn that paradises are usually places where you get killed.”
― Rick Riordan, The Battle of the Labyrinth

“Hard to call it a party without sardines.”
― Brandon Mull, The Candy Shop War

“Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I'm not sure about the universe.”
― Albert Einstein

“Insanity is doing the same thing, over and over again, but expecting different results.”
― Narcotics Anonymous

“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.”
― Groucho Marx, The Essential Groucho: Writings For By And About Groucho Marx

“Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.”
― Anthony G. Oettinger

“When you're in jail, a good friend will be trying to bail you out. A best friend will be in the cell next to you saying, 'Damn, that was fun'.”
― Groucho Marx

“From the moment I picked up your book until I put it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.”
― Groucho Marx

“The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made.”
― Groucho Marx

“I sent the club a wire stating, PLEASE ACCEPT MY RESIGNATION. I DON'T WANT TO BELONG TO ANY CLUB THAT WILL ACCEPT ME AS A MEMBER.”
― Groucho Marx, Groucho and Me

“I've had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.”
― Groucho Marx

“Well, art is art, isn't it? Still, on the other hand, water is water! And east is east and west is west and if you take cranberries and stew them like applesauce they taste much more like prunes than rhubarb does. Now, uh... now you tell me what you know.”
― Groucho Marx

“I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.”
― Groucho Marx

“One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I'll never know.”
― Groucho Marx

“I'm not crazy about reality, but it's still the only place to get a decent meal.”
― Groucho Marx

“Either this man is dead or my watch has stopped.”
― Groucho Marx

“If you're not having fun, you're doing something wrong.”
― Groucho Marx

“Whatever it is, I'm against it.”
― Groucho Marx

“Dance you guys!" Thalia ordered. "You look stupid just standing there."
I looked nervously at Annabeth, then at the groups of girls who were roaming the gym.
"Well?" Annabeth asked.
"Um, who should I ask?"
She punched me in the gut. "Me, Seaweed Brain."
"Oh. Oh right.”
― Rick Riordan

“Rachel: They asked me a lot of questions about you. I played dumb.
Annabeth: Was it hard?”
― Rick Riordan

“I wrote this story for you, but when I began it I had not realized that girls grow quicker than books. As a result you are already too old for fairy tales, and by the time it is printed and bound you will be older still. But some day you will be old enough to start reading fairy tales again. You can then take it down from some upper shelf, dust it, and tell me what you think of it. I shall probably be too deaf to hear, and too old to understand a word you say, but I shall still be your affectionate Godfather, C. S. Lewis.”
― C.S. Lewis, The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe