“Most common, it seems, with mothers who are emotionally shut down and disengaged is simply to continue a superficial relationship. This is a relationship with minimal contact, which stays on the surface, one which never was and never will be close. This fits for those adult children who don’t want to hurt mother or lose family contacts and aren’t actively being hurt as long as they maintain an emotional distance. With mothers who were intrusive or enmeshed or overly helpless, moving into a more boundaried relationship with less contact may be a new move, intended to protect you from the ongoing hurt that you experience in the relationship. It is a demotion of sorts for Mother as it moves her out of your inner circle where she had too much influence.”