“I’m not…dead yet. Breathing is so agonizing. To have to endure such agony just to live…living is so cumbersome. I was taught that you either go to heaven or hell when you die. I wonder if it’s easy to breathe in heaven. A place where my body or my head won’t hurt. I hope it is. Is hell an even more agonizing place than this? If it is, I’m scared. I don’t want to go. I don’t. I’m scared. I’m scared of going to hell.”