“It’s not that I’m unhappy, but I’m not especially happy either . . . It’s so awful, this feeling that joy has slipped through my fingers. I don’t want to see a doctor about it: he would probably tell me I was depressed and stuff me full of drugs. No, it’s just this sort of . . . dissatisfaction. It’s nothing serious, but . . . it’s as if my heart simply isn’t in it anymore.”