Sean Gibson
It’s a love story for the ages, a tale as old as time, yet as timely as it is timeless.
Boy meets Czech model, has three kids who later serve as executive vice presidents of his multibillion dollar company in an extraordinary act of nepotism, divorces Czech model following tabloid-fodder affair with television starlet, marries starlet, names new daughter after famously uppity luxury retailer, divorces starlet, begins dating Slovene model, marries Slovene model and has child number five, runs for President of the United States, alienates wife number three in the course of so doing (though it could also have been the video- and audio-taped evidence of his propensity for misogynistic commentary if not outright sexual assault he views as a privilege of celebrity responsible for putting her off), gets elected by less than half of the people who voted, runs country with iron fist by making decisions that require no basis in facts or data, lives apart from wife, watches cable news on endless loop and tweets that any negative coverage of him, no matter how truthful, constitutes “fake news,” traffics in alternative facts.
It’s as beautiful as it is heartbreaking, as inspiring as it is romantic.
And that’s why Donald and Melania Trump are my favorite fictional couple. They have a love that—
Wait, what? They’re NOT fictional?
Well, f@ck me sideways.
I guess I'll go with Alf-Khalan and Jillian of Water for Alien Were-Dinos fame, then. Because mint chocolate chip rules.
Boy meets Czech model, has three kids who later serve as executive vice presidents of his multibillion dollar company in an extraordinary act of nepotism, divorces Czech model following tabloid-fodder affair with television starlet, marries starlet, names new daughter after famously uppity luxury retailer, divorces starlet, begins dating Slovene model, marries Slovene model and has child number five, runs for President of the United States, alienates wife number three in the course of so doing (though it could also have been the video- and audio-taped evidence of his propensity for misogynistic commentary if not outright sexual assault he views as a privilege of celebrity responsible for putting her off), gets elected by less than half of the people who voted, runs country with iron fist by making decisions that require no basis in facts or data, lives apart from wife, watches cable news on endless loop and tweets that any negative coverage of him, no matter how truthful, constitutes “fake news,” traffics in alternative facts.
It’s as beautiful as it is heartbreaking, as inspiring as it is romantic.
And that’s why Donald and Melania Trump are my favorite fictional couple. They have a love that—
Wait, what? They’re NOT fictional?
Well, f@ck me sideways.
I guess I'll go with Alf-Khalan and Jillian of Water for Alien Were-Dinos fame, then. Because mint chocolate chip rules.
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