Thank you so much for being open about your disorder. I was recently fired because I didn't "leave my bipolar disorder out of the workplace." How do you suggest I educate my employers about the disorder without getting defensive or them looking at me like I'm incapable after proving myself otherwise? Thank you.

Emilie Autumn Dearest Kaylyn,

Thank you for sharing and being so honest. I'm going to give you an answer that you may not like, but I hope you will understand:

As bipolar people, we HAVE to leave our disorder out of the workplace. We have to. We have to be more skilled, more "stable", more "normal" seeming than anyone else (in professional situations I mean—in creative situations we can use our "crazy";). As a female, you already know what this is like to have to be better. Now add an interesting mental condition onto that, and that's how much stronger and better you have to be. Why? Because once we allow ourselves (meaning all bipolar individuals) to be seen as "weaker" or "less capable" or "less reliable," we are ruined, and we have contributed to that stereotype that we cannot be trusted.

How do you do this? How do you seem normal when you're not, but your professional situation (or just general life) demands it? It's not easy, but I know you can do it, and I know this because, as a rule, bipolar people are exceptionally intelligent. You make sure that you are getting the help and support that your mental challenges demand. You make sure that you have a therapist or at the very least a good friend to talk to. You look into balancing medication if you haven't already. You CAN function in EVERY situation with absolute success if you are taking care of yourself. But we need a lot of help, and that's ok. Some times it takes work to get that help, but I did it and so can you.

Lastly, don't worry about educating your employers—use that energy on making yourself as healthy as possible instead. The truth is that it isn't our employer's responsibility to know anything about us, and if we require that they give us special consideration, we are making ourselves less valuable.

We have to accept that we live in a world where special consideration will not be given to us, or anyone really, and that's actually just fine because we really don't need it. In my showbiz career, everybody knows about the things that make me different. But in my general participation within society, I never talk about it, and no one knows, and that is just as it should be. When talking to therapists and friends and family, let it all out and ask for help when you need it. But, in the outside world, think of being bipolar as a precious secret that is yours to keep and actually benefit from, because there are indeed benefits.

You've got this, Kaylyn, trust. You've learned something from this situation, and you will thrive in the next one. I believe in you.

All my love,
~ EA

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