Terms and Conditions (Dreamland Billionaires, #2)

by Lauren Asher

Not him getting her name wrong lol

“Special is the last word I would use to describe you.” It feels far too generic for someone like her.

Oh he loves her

“I like you enough to want to save you from yourself. I’m sure it must be a chemical imbalance of some kind, so my therapist will be hearing all about this on Monday.”

Lol I love Iris already

“Obviously Declan must have been desperate if he chose you of all people.”

Oh wooow

“If not love, then what for?” My hand presses against my chest, clawing at the material of my dress as if I want to rip my heart out. If Cal were here, I imagine he would hand me a golden trophy for my performance. Maybe Declan would even give me a raise.

Come on, Viola!

I go off, telling them about how Declan and I realized our true feelings during a dangerously turbulent flight to Tokyo. Of how I was crying about dying in a plane crash and how Declan kissed me to make it stop. The hardest part of my lie was saying how I kept our relationship a secret for a year because I wasn’t sure how things would turn out.

Oh she's GOOD

“Three hundred million.” Her step falters but she doesn’t stop until her hand grips the knob.

I'm weak in the knees that's a big number

Her brand of crazy happens to draw mine out. “You’re a pain in my ass.” “Nope. That’s just the same old stick acting up again.” To think I pay her more than any assistant in this building for this kind of treatment. Because you both know her worth.

They'd actually make such a good couple

She slides the papers toward me. “Sure. Once you make the appropriate changes, including upping the initial payment to three hundred million dollars, then I’ll go ahead and sign it.”

Lmaoo I know that's right!

“One day that mouth is going to get you in trouble.” His voice lowers.

My eyes bulge as he shoves a spoon full of cake into my open mouth. “I finally found the perfect way to shut you up.” I glare at him as I taste the most delicious dessert I’ve ever had. His gaze remains glued to my lips as he drags the clean spoon past them. “All I need to do is keep your mouth permanently occupied.” I graciously proceed to choke.

Ugh I already love this book

“I’m sure there’s a certain charm about living next to active crime scenes, but you’ll get over it.”

“Kiss her again and I’ll enjoy ripping your tongue from your throat.” He holds up his hands. “The only reason I told you about our kiss is so that you can stop thinking I want to make a move on her. I’m not interested in her like that. Trust me.” “Because the kiss was terrible,” I repeat back in a voice erased of any emotion. “Because she was never meant to be mine in the first place.” Damn right she wasn’t. Fake marriage or not, Iris is destined to be with one man and one man only. Me.

Not him being in denial and lowkey delusional

Nana swings the door open. She scans Declan from head to toe before turning her gaze toward me. “I now understand why you’re willing to work weekends and holidays for this man. If my boss had looked half as good as him, I would have never quit.”

I love Nana lol

“Are you okay?” I refill Declan’s water cup for the third time in twenty minutes. A damp layer of sweat covers his forehead, and his usually slicked-back hair sticks out in all different directions. He even removed his suit jacket.

HAHAHA

Hygge

“I can assure you that I will always have Iris’s best interests at heart.” Even if they jeopardize mine.

“We’re not going.”

Boooooooo

But I’m not a bad bitch. Not in the slightest. All it took was some rustling leaves to have me hightailing my butt to our backyard and parking myself on a lounge chair.

Girl same lol

“I don’t want you to quit.” His admission hangs between us. “Why? Because it would suck to find a replacement?” “No one can replace you.”

“Iris?” This time, I turn around and press my back against the glass. “Yes?” “If you try to leave me again, I’ll make you regret it.” The slight rasp in his voice does something catastrophic to my lower half. “Is that a threat?” “It’s a promise.” His face remains blank, but his eyes rival the stars above us.

“Shh.” I tug the blanket I was snuggled into over my head. Wait. A blanket? I don’t remember falling asleep, let alone having the energy to grab a blanket.

Aww he loves her

You care about her. Fuck.

“If I ever get caught, it’s a good thing I have you to bail me out of jail.” “Who says I wouldn’t be in there with you?”

Declan cannot keep saying things like this and expect me to believe he's not in love with her. If 2+2 is 4....

He leans in. “Not having to think about anything but which way I wanted to fuck you next.”

AHHHHHHHHH

He reaches out and tucks a braid behind my ear. “Selling a story,” he whispers.

I laugh as I shove his shoulder. “Shut up. We both know you actually like my brain.” “I like your heart more.”

Shut up I fucking hate him

He avoids my gaze as he assesses his menu. “That’s our thing.”

FUCK YOU SIR I'm crying

“I’m enjoying the view.” She glances out the window. “Says the man who hasn’t even looked outside once.” “That’s not the view I’m talking about.”

“I’m not confused. Far from it, actually. I know exactly what I want.” “And what is that?” “You.”

AHHHHH FUCK

Iris might have rejected my first offer, but I will rise to the challenge and prove just how good things can be between us if she were to give me a chance.

I love some good old fashioned pining. Let me grab a snack

Our marriage might be fake, but these feelings burning inside me are anything but. It’s only a matter of time before I make her mine. She just doesn’t know it yet.

I'm going to yeet my kindle across the room

His eyes wrinkle at the corners as his lips turn up into a small smile. “You might have gone about all the steps in the wrong order, but that doesn’t mean you can’t restart from the beginning and try again.”

Aww that's sweet

His frail lips break out into a genuine smile. “You chase.”

I'm READY

My breathing is ragged by the time I’m done. I lay my head against the tile and curse to myself, knowing damn well I will never be satisfied until Iris is mine. Not even close.

You were smiling? Pull it together and stop rereading text messages like a lovesick teenager.

Oh she's down BAD

I don’t release her hand as I lean in and whisper in her ear, “Keep making a show in front of everyone and I’ll make you regret it later.”

“I think my feet need to be amputated.” She flinches as she loses her footing. I don’t think as I haul her over my shoulder, bringing her ass to my eye level. “Problem solved.” “Declan!” she shouts into my back. “What are you doing?!” She rams her small fists into my spine, and I grunt. “Being a gentleman.”

They are sickening

“You’re a disgrace to your last name.” I smack her ass for that comment. “Did you just spank me?!”

She groans. “Shh, Declan. Stop talking and do that thing with your tongue again.”

OH???

“I planned a fake date for us.”

"fake date" my ass

My next sentence comes out ragged. “What are you doing?” “Helping my wife.” My throat bobs. “You’re growing a bit too comfortable with that nickname for my liking.” “I use it to remind you of your place.” “And what’s that?” “Mine.”

“Now you fill one side with your toppings.” “Not both?” His deep chuckle rattles my bones. “Greedy as always.” “More like famished.” “That makes two of us,” he replies huskily as he presses his hips into my ass.

“I might be cold, rude, and distant, but I’m not blind. My whole job is about evaluating assets and it turns out that you’re my biggest one.”

“Who knew you were such a nice guy underneath your grumpy exterior?” “Don’t go telling anyone else or they’ll be disappointed to find out it’s only for you.”

His chest heaves from a deep breath. “Would you like a greenhouse?” “In your backyard?” “I think we can start calling it ours, seeing as you live there too.” My mouth opens before shutting again. “You’re offering to build me a greenhouse?”

I officially raise the white flag as I stand on the tips of my toes and kiss him.

“What are the rules?” His eyes bleed to black. “There is only one.” “That seems easy.” He tsks as he drags my dress hem a little higher. My breathing comes out harsher, and that seems to only encourage him. “Beg.”

“I hate you,” I say through gritted teeth. “I look forward to fucking the lies right out of you.”

“I’m not trying to hurt her, dumbass. I’m trying to show her that I care about her,” I snap. Cal’s eyes widen. “Holy shit.”

Holy shit indeed