The Five Love Languages of Children

by Gary Chapman

Passive-aggressive behavior is an expression of anger that gets back at a person or group indirectly, or “passively.” It is a subconscious determination to do exactly opposite of what an authority figure wants. An authority figure is a parent, teacher, minister, boss, policeman, laws, societal norms—any person or value system that represents authority. Of course, for a child or teenager, the primary authority figures are parents.

Many parents have made the tragic mistake of thinking that all anger is wrong and should be disciplined out of children. This approach does not work.

Parents find it hard to understand that the anger must come out some way, that it cannot be totally bottled up. As a result, many parents respond to children’s expressions of anger in wrong and destructive ways.

You want to avoid passive-aggressive behavior at all costs.