More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
Read between
June 1 - June 1, 2023
turning our thinking around and asking more personally accountable questions is one of the most powerful and effective things we can do to improve our organizations and our lives.
The definition of the QBQ: A tool that enables individuals to practice personal accountability by making better choices in the moment. And we accomplish this by asking better questions of ourselves.
accountable thinking such as What can I do to help out? and How can I provide more value?
The idea that we are accountable for our own choices and are free to make better ones is fundamental to the QBQ.
The Question Behind the Question is built on the observation that our first reactions are often negative, bringing to mind Incorrect Questions (IQs). But if in each moment of decision we can instead discipline ourselves to look behind those initial Incorrect Questions and ask ourselves better ones (QBQs), the questions themselves will lead us to better results.
Here are the three simple guidelines for creating a QBQ: 1. Begin with “What” or “How” (not “Why,” “When,” or “Who”). 2. Contain an “I” (not “they,” “we,” or “you”). 3. Focus on action.
“How can I do my job better today?” “What can I do to improve the situation?” “How can I support others?”
as we write in Outstanding! 47 Ways to Make Your Organization Exceptional, “The reality is if a strategy or tactic is working now, the odds are high that it won’t work in the future. There is just too much change taking place in our world for it to be any other way.” So we need to develop a repertoire of responses to be prepared when our engine unexpectedly quits.
Are you facing change? Any engines quit in your life lately? If so, ask a better question. Here’s one that really works: “How can I adapt to the changing world?”
Effective communication is not someone else’s job, nor does it begin with being understood. Rather, it’s about understanding the other person.
“What can I do to become a more effective listener?” or “How can I better understand others?”
“What solution can I provide?” “How can I more creatively reach my customer?” “What can I do to find the information I need to make a decision?” “How can I excel in my work right now?” Remember: The answers are in the questions.
I’ll do it later thinking can be costly in many ways. Let’s take care of the little things while they’re still little.
Focusing on what we don’t have is a waste of time and energy and kills innovation. To really make a difference, let’s instead focus our energy on succeeding within the box. Let’s ask the QBQ “How can I achieve with the resources I already have?”
The better question to ask is “How can I apply what I’m hearing?”—even if I’ve heard it before.
Blame and “Whodunit?” questions solve nothing. They create fear, destroy innovation, inhibit teamwork, build walls, and prevent people from engaging. Instead of brainstorming and working together to get things done, we blame-storm and accomplish nothing.
“What can I do today to solve the problem?” “How can I help move the project forward?” “What action can I take to ‘own’ the situation?”
Accountable people look for solutions, not scapegoats. They blame no one—not even themselves. If a “self-critique” is warranted, they ask QBQs like “What could I have done differently?” and “How can I learn from this experience?”
For all the time and resources our organizations spend on team-building, we still seem to forget one simple truth: We’re all on the same team.
The Ultimate QBQ: “How can I let go of what I can’t control?”
The better question is “What can I do right now to make a difference?”
As we write in Flipping the Switch (the companion book to QBQ!), “Ownership does not require having an equity stake in the organization or holding an official position of leadership. It simply means facing problems head-on instead of blaming, complaining, procrastinating, or making excuses. Ownership is personal accountability in its purest form.” It’s also an idea each of us can commit to in every area of our lives. Ownership: A commitment of the head, heart, and hands to fix the problem and never again affix the blame.
Want to strengthen your team? Here’s an excellent QBQ to get you started: “How can I appreciate people’s gifts and strengths just as they are?”
successful teams are based on individuals who practice personal accountability.
true personal accountability is about each of us holding ourselves accountable for our own thinking and behaviors and the results they produce.
All QBQs contain an “I,” not “they,” “we,” or “you.” Questions that contain an “I” turn our focus away from other people and circumstances and put it back on ourselves, where it can do the most good. We can’t change other people. We often can’t control circumstances and events. The only things we have any real control over are our own thoughts and actions.
How much better things would be if we all tried to mold and shape our own thoughts and actions rather than those of others. The bottom line is that the QBQ works because it’s based on the truth I can only change me.
The definition of integrity is this: Being what I say I am by acting in accordance with my words.
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know—it’s me!”
The QBQ for each of us is “How can I set a better example?”
The ultimate goal of the QBQ is action and it’s also our third guideline: All QBQs focus on action.
To make a QBQ action-focused, we add verbs such as “do,” “make,” “achieve,” and “build” to questions that start with “What” or “How” and contain an “I.”
The practice of personal accountability: We discipline our thoughts. We ask better questions. We take action.
Action, even when it leads to mistakes, brings learning and growth. Inaction brings stagnation and atrophy.
Action leads us toward solutions. Inaction does nothing and holds us in the past. • Action requires courage. Inaction often indicates fear. • Action builds confidence; inaction, doubt.
Leadership, more than anything else, is about the way we think. It’s a moment-to-moment disciplining of our thoughts. It’s about practicing personal accountability and choosing to make a positive contribution, no matter what our role or “level.”
“Servant leadership” is the QBQ way, and it requires a humble spirit combined with a servant’s heart. Humility is the cornerstone of leadership.
For most of us, defining boundaries—where my accountability ends and another’s begins—is a lifelong process. I suggest asking the QBQ “How can I set good boundaries?” But accountable people are committed first and foremost to excelling in their own job and performing their own work the best they can.
QBQ: “How can I serve them?”
QBQs: “What can I do today to be more effective?” “How can I add value for my customers?”
QBQ: “How can I better understand the challenges faced by the field?” “What can I do to build rapport with the salespeople?”
QBQs: “How can I be a more effective coach?” “What can I do to better understand each person I manage?” “How can I build a stronger team?”
QBQs: “How can I be a better leader?” “What can I do to show I care?” “How can I communicate more effectively?”
QBQs: “What can I do to be more productive?” “How can I adapt to the changing environment?” “What can I do to develop myself?” “How can I become more engaged?”
QBQs: “What can I do to understand the sales reps’ frustrations?” “How can I learn more about what the customer wants?” “What can I do to articulate my ideas more creatively?”
Teacher IQs:
QBQs: “How can I better support each of the kids in my classroom?” “What can I do to own the performance of my students?” “How can I be more creative in my instruction?”
All QBQs: 1. Begin with “What” or “How” (not “Why,” “When,” or “Who”). 2. Contain an “I” (not “they,” “we,” or “you”). 3. Focus on action.
The spirit of the QBQ is personal accountability: • No more victim thinking, complaining, procrastinating, or blaming. • I can only change me. • Take action!
most QBQs are asked in our minds to enable us to practice personal accountability. It’s not about asking better questions of our coworkers, customers, or family. It’s about asking better questions of ourselves.
