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couldn't understand why that was, why these servants were so different from our servants at home. For the first time in my life I felt out of place. I felt white. And I didn't like the feeling at all. I wiggled out of Tessie's grasp.
broke my heart to be reminded of the truth about them-that Josiah and Tessie weren't allowed to be man and wife; that Grady had been torn without warning from his mother's arms; that Eli could be whipped for secretly preaching about Jesus in the pine grove or killed for knowing how to read.
The Democratic Party had split in two, with Northern Democrats nominating Senator Stephen
Douglas of Illinois, and Southern Democrats nominating Kentucky's Senator John Breckinridge. The Republicans chose a compromise candidate named Abraham Lincoln, who pledged to halt the spread of slavery in any states that joined the Union in the future but promised not to interfere with slavery in the states where it already existed. I thought Mr. Lincoln's position was a fair compromise; Charles disagreed.
"Don't go running ahead of God. He's gonna tell you when the time's right. Then whatever you do gonna make a difference. And one more thing-Queen Esther asked all her servants to pray with her. We be praying with you,
"The decision isn't who you gonna help and who you gonna betray. The decision is whether or not you gonna listen for God's voice and do what God telling you to do. Might be something as silly as marching around Jericho in circles. Or it might be as hard and as dangerous as helping the enemy, like Rahab did."
The Confederate dollar had depreciated until it was worth only four cents. The shoes I had bought Gilbert six months ago now sold for four times as much. The four-dollar butter Esther had complained about seemed cheap with butter now selling for fifteen dollars a pound. We ate a lot of potatoes, but even they were expensive at twenty-five dollars a bushel.
"The Yankees have set out to make Richmond their prize six times, under six different commanding generals-McDowell, McClellan, Hooker, Burnside ...
was lying out there in a trench, in danger, and you betrayed me to the enemy? I was being shot at and shelled day after day and you told them where to aim? I risked my life for you. For you, Caroline!
