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(Fleeing for your life is an excellent motivator for a lifetime of general physical fitness.)
He’s a king, he has minions, and he’s rich. I am going to die.
“Everyone else will call you Ama,” he said. “But to me, you are Amalourne.”
Landon waggled a finger at us. “I’m still not convinced a werewolf on a harness is legal, so you’re on thin ice with me, Mr. I Look Like An Angel And A Fae Had A Baby!” Even though I was brought up by humans, I’m never mentally fortified enough for just how brave their ignorance makes them.
I’ve got certain death next to me, and probable death across from me. If I don’t die from making a mistake, my anxiety might make my heart explode.
“You are obscenely covetous and proud of your bald cat,” Noctus said.
This is swerving off my worst nightmares and turning into something just…weird.
“You are very interesting, Chloe of Book Nookery,” Noctus declared. “No, I am not. I’m not interesting at all. I’m very boring,” I said. Noctus chuckled—a sound that was deep, even, and warm like a bonfire. “I must disagree. You actually remind me of someone.” “Really? Who?” “My cat.”
How hilarious. The elven king of war has a cat that dislikes weapons. Life does like to play its jokes.
I stayed still for a moment as Noctus watched with interest, then gently pressed my paw into the palm of his hand. Noctus’s lips curved, and he rubbed under my chin. “Such an intelligent beauty.” His voice was so genuine and warm, for a moment I actually felt proud. I can’t believe it. I’m going to blush. As a cat!
Yep, in today’s episode of “I’m Being Cuddled By A Killer”, it’s scary that such an obviously competent elf is so terrified of Noctus he won’t look at him.
“Ama is mine,” Noctus said. “I should be her everything.” “She’s a cat. That’s never going to happen,” Aristide said,
“It seems Ama has done more for you than all the detailed instructions I’ve given you about ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’,” Ker said.
Cuteness is a valuable weapon to wield as a cat. I’ve practiced in front of a mirror so I know how to look as charming as possible. It works great on humans.
Noctus frowned. “Do I look like I need to make friends?” “Noctus,” Aristide said. “I can’t see, and I think you look like you need friends.”
“It seems Ama is an omnivore.” Ker clapped for me. “How very forward thinking of her!”
“I’ve been your friend for centuries, and I’ve never gotten a gift.” “You also don’t purr for people,” Ker said. “That’s a pretty charming trait.” “I could purr,” Aristide sniffed. “I’m sure I’d be great at it.”
“Charon, that was the opposite of helpful,” Aristide said. “You’re fired from being the secondary voice of reason for our rag-tag band.”
The blue and white flames flickered in the fireplace, reflecting on the pond, and I closed my eyes, still purring. Noctus rested a finger on the top of my head. “I know you’re not a cat, Amalourne.”
“Yes, you can come in, but only because the Home Owners’ Association informed me I cannot leave the elderly outside, crying.”
“I didn’t think there was a thing on this earth that could bring an elf low. Behold: the cat!”
“Amalourne,” he said. His voice had returned to a soothing timbre, and his arm on my lower back was gentle. I’m safe, he’s fine. “They threatened you.” Back was the flat, dark tone. Okay, maybe he’s not fine!
