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This is so fucking dirty, so depraved… And we’re not even doing it for the fans. We’re doing it for us, because we want to.
And just like everything with us, it seems to just happen. Maybe the reason I’ve been fighting this so hard is because I knew it was inevitable… The chemistry of hate was never strong enough to overpower the hunger of want
If we’re not doing this for the fans, then that means we’re doing it… for each other. For a relationship of some kind. And I don’t think Kyran is prepared to deal with that. Truth be told, I’m not sure I am either. Because I’ve never done anything like that before. Not with a guy… Not with anyone
“But keep wearing the jersey. Please.” Fuck me sideways, I’m going to swoon to death.
“Why do you act like you don’t care about anything when it’s so obvious that you do?” He tilts his head. “Why do you… do all these drugs to tranquilize the real Avi? You don’t have to… He’s crazy smart, and sweet, and… kind of fucking awesome.”
“It’s not always easy being me, Kyran. It’s not like it is for you… Nobody tells me how awesome I am, except my mom. But she’s just saying that because she has to.”
“No, she isn’t. She’s saying it because it’s true. Avi, do you have any idea how much I wish I could be like you? Be fucking different and proud of that fact?? I think that’s why I always hated you so much…
Because I’m jealous of how… fr...
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“I want you to fuck me.”
“You want me to fuck… you
I want him moving in between my legs… I want him rutting inside me, and I want to come on his cock. I want to fucking bottom, at least once, just to see what it’s like. And the staggering but somehow easiest facet is that I only want it with him. “Fuck…”
“Even more now. I wanna shove my cock in you while you’re wearing my jersey, baby.”
“You taste like candy, Twizzler boy.” He grins, and I chuckle. “My strawberry sweetness.” “I’m fucking obsessed with you,” I whimper into his mouth. “You were totally right.” “Good.” He reaches into my pocket, fishing out the bottle of lube. “Because I think I’m kind of obsessed with you too…”
“Don’t die.” He kisses my lips, dragging the head of his cock over my hole. “I need you.” “I need you,”
“Are you mine?” he whispers shakily,
“Yes,” I croak, clenching on him as my orgasm looms. “All yours.” “Good. I’m all yours too.”
I can’t fall in love with my stepbrother.
“No. No, you were not too rough, trust me. I… That was the most amazing thing I’ve ever felt.”
“So does that mean we’re both b...
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“We can be any level of versatile you...
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“Wouldn’t that look sort of… suspicious? Leaving a New Year’s party at your own dorm before midnight…”
“But what if the person I
want to kiss at midnight is somew...
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“Then I think you should leave the party… and go find that person.”
“So then it’s a date.”
I did make it. I made it to us… “Happy New Year, baby,”
“Would you still want to… if someone knew you were here?”
“I… I think so.”
“Is that the end of the line? Friend Land?”
“I think there might be another place. But… no one’s ever been there.” He blinks wide eyes at me. “It’s pretty vacant.” “Like an abandoned amusement park?”
“Yea. I’ve never met anyone who just… went there willingly.” “If I wanted to go…”
“Would you ta...
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“If you were sure…”
“If you were… comfortable going there…” I gulp. “It would be your call, Ky. Because there’s absolutely no way I could keep you out.”
“It’s not about the money…” My voice loses all traces of anger, slipping into pleading hopelessness as I whisper, “It’s about us
“Ky… this account is us. It’s the whole story, played out for people who have loved watching us together. People who think we’re special
“I know you’re used to people fawning over you, but I’m not, okay?? I never get that, from anyone but them. The fans. They think we’re fucking perfect, and it’s not just about the sex… I’ve gotten messages from people telling me how watching our videos gave them
the courage to come to terms with their sexuality… From people who say they felt scared, and alone, ...
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“And I’ve gotten messages from people who said they could feel our connection… That seeing me and you together is more special than a million other videos of people fucking.”
“And I agree, baby. This isn’t about the sex, or the money anymore. It’s about Kyran and Avi, and I don’t… I don’t want to give
this up if it means I’ll lose...
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“Do you think you love him?”
“Yea, probably.”
“It turned into more,” I whisper. “I guess we peeled back some layers or something, and it just… I don’t know. It changed.”
“You actually fucking want each other,”
“For real. It wasn’t an act between you two. It never was… Not even close. Whether you claim you hated each other is irrelevant. You never actually did.”
“You don’t go down without a fight… Trust me, I know.”
“Damn fucking straight!” Guty shouted, slapping me hard on the back. “Now let’s go fucking win this thing, baby!” I’m not your baby… My grin widened, and I slapped my hands together, muscles stiffening with determination. I’m his.
But when my thrilled gaze flew to the sidelines, he wasn’t there… The mascot. And my smile faded a bit, homesickness setting in with some other things… Regret and unrest. The win would have felt much better at home, that was for sure.
That one week, from Christmas to New Years, was the best time of my whole life. And I can shove it down, keep pretending it was just sex, or something to pass the time, but no one’s buying that shit anymore. Not even me.
