The Book of Azrael (Gods & Monsters, #1)

by Amber V. Nicole

since I was well over average height for most women. I wasn’t a cute, petite little thing like every movie or book craves. I was lacking in the breast department, but made up for it in my hips. They were the only curvy part of me. I was lean, with strong, supple muscles, a fighter in every sense of the word.

So, through the process of elimination, we had deduced that I would die if my heart were removed from my body. My stupid mortal heart was my weakness.

A life where I was loved and could be loved. Just a life.

Marriage wasn’t a piece of paper you got that said you were bound to one another. It was beyond permanent and meant you were one in almost every sense of the word. When you married, you became true partners, the bond that of soul mates.

“It makes me enough.”

All Gabby wanted was the best for me, the same things I wanted for her, and it broke me.

“Squeeze harder. I almost feel something.”

“My only.”

“I will never be a leader like you.” “Excellent. Be greater.”

It was genuine, yet I felt nothing. I hadn’t felt anything in years, and I knew what it was, knew what was happening to me. The worst part was that a part of me didn’t care.

“What shall you have me do, Father?” “Simple. Use the title you have earned,” Unir said. “End worlds, my son.”

“I’m going to find that woman.”

I wanted to laugh and remember how much beauty life could hold. I just wanted to feel.

Who had made him hot? Why was he hot now?

It was a small, smoldering flame that I could feel even with these damned chains on, and I took comfort in it.

“You would fight a god?” “No,” I said without hesitation, “I’d kill one.”

There was no point in saving me if I can’t even live.”

What was this feeling? Was I sad for him—sad for the love he would never again see? Or was it pain—pain for the woman he was leaving behind? Would she feel lost and abandoned, too, like I did at the mere thought of losing my sister?

I wiped what was left of Alistair from my hands.

She shall remain free, unharmed, and alive, or the deal is broken.

For a split second, I felt something. It was short and fleeting, but the way she’d said it triggered an emotion, and for a moment, I reveled in the ability to feel anything.

The worst part was that I saw him bleeding, near death, and I had not felt a single thing. There had been no pain in my chest like when my father died, no immense rush of power telling me to destroy the creature who dangled him like a trophy. I was truly broken.

The probability of ending them all while keeping her alive was slim, but not completely zero.

“That’s not a quake. That’s my sister.”

Liam was staring at us with the strangest expression on his face.

“Okay, I’m going to go save the world from impending doom. You just stay out of trouble.” She laughed wetly. “Out of the two of us, I am not the troublemaker.”

She wrapped the sheer white robe around herself, failing to cover the overpriced lingerie beneath. “Am I interrupting something?” I asked with a grin. She waved a hand, still looking at Liam. “Oh, no. It’s early. I was just making coffee.

I couldn’t control the blooddreams, and I hated the images and emotions that came with them.

“You drive me mad, my son. A simple task is what I ask of you, and you still cannot complete that.”

“It is better to be prepared for war than for war to come and you are not,” Unir said, meeting Liam’s gaze.

A god must not be selfish. That is the utmost law.”

“I loved your mother, and I will never love another.

“Why did you not bring her back?” Liam called to his father’s back. Unir froze and bowed his head, but did not turn around. “You could. It is one of your gifts.”

Resurrection, no matter the circumstances, is forbidden. You do not gain something so precious as a life without paying a hefty price.

I was so sick of dealing with men and their egos.

“Now, concentrate. Every thought you have and every emotion you feel comes from your center. Your anger,” he pointed to my stomach, “comes from your gut.” He pointed at my chest next. “Your desires come from your heart, and your idiocy…” He reached out and ruffled the hair atop my head, making the strands dance across my shoulders. “… comes from here.”

“The same power that runs through my veins flows through yours. Yes, given the technique or strength of the wielder, it can damage, but it can also rebuild and heal. Even the strongest among us have learned how to use it to heal. You are not a failure, nor will you be.”

I did not think as I leaned down to gather her up into my arms. I cradled her against my chest

She may not have been mortal anymore, but a part of her still felt and loved. It was that part that made it difficult to dislike her. She roused emotions in me that made me forget what she was and what she was capable of.

It was another reminder that being around her made me feel when nothing and no one else had been able to reach me.

“It’s okay to not be okay, Liam.”

I’d never had anyone there for me. Not like this. Not when I’d bared pieces of my soul and revealed my weaknesses. She was my enemy, yet my enemy was the only one who seemed to understand me and the demons I fought.

you can share your burdens with me. I promise not to judge or ridicule or make you feel less than because of them. Your burdens become my burdens.”

It was as if a pebble had dropped into the middle of a quiet lake. In the grand scheme of things, it meant nothing. Yet it started a small, seemingly insignificant ripple, and something shifted.

I always loved my hair played with while I drifted off to sleep. It was just a comforting touch, reminding me I wasn’t alone.

It was more than overwhelming, and this other emotion was one I wasn’t familiar with. It was something warm and happy, but also sharp and painful. I had lived alone with a harrowing emptiness for so long that I wasn’t sure what to do with warmth and peace. The words could not encompass the feelings,

but the part of me that had reveled in the intimacy knew I would take his secrets to my grave. That was the part of me that existed only because Gabby existed, and it terrified me.

“I am not comfortable being out in public. I detest large crowds and would much rather be by myself.

“If I had the choice, and I had to choose, I would want an equal. A partner in every aspect of my life,

I felt her posture change, a bit of that cocky edge she wore so well dropping away. That bothered me. The air around us became charged as clouds billowed in the distance, my temper festering. I wouldn’t allow anything to dim her spirit.