The Book of Azrael (Gods & Monsters, #1)

by Amber V. Nicole

The stories said you two were destined to spill each other’s blood until the stars died,

“I will not let him have you.”

She had become what she needed to be to protect the only person who still saw good in her.

Not able to bear the sight of her so alone in the dark, I reached out and took her hand the same way she had done mine during my night terrors.

I didn’t remember how long we talked, but somewhere amidst her laughter and smiles, I decided I would rip the world apart for her.

Liam turned and stalked away from me. It was silent again, and it hurt. Being around him annoyed me more often than not, but at other times, I just had fun.

His withdrawal made me feel lost.

It’s as if the walls themselves are trying to close in around me. You seem to be the only one I can stand to be around.”

His legion has crumbled since you killed Alistair and left.”

“No. If it was known, then she knew the risks and still became pregnant. And you know what I think? I think she loved your father and you so much that she didn’t care. I would bet all the money in the world that she didn’t regret it. A family’s love is stronger than anything, trust me.”

I shall fix that.”

“I’ll fix that as well.”

yet she had calmed me. Dianna had been doing that a lot with just her presence.

“She is something rare, that is for sure. No matter what Kaden did to turn her fully into a creature of hate and fear, she did not break. It’s that heart of hers. It may be a mortal heart, but it is stronger than anything he has encountered. She may feed, fuck, and breathe like us, but she is not one of us. I think you know that deep down. She is different.”

“He is old, Liam, old and powerful. He has been digging for information on you for centuries.”

The pounding in my head was too much for me to stop. I needed air. I needed Dianna.

I had stopped sharing a bed with Dianna—and I hadn’t known a single night of peace since.

Maybe Kaden was an Ig’Morruthen that had escaped the Gods War and landed here, planning to rebuild his ranks.

I found myself relaxing for the first time in weeks. It was so easy to speak with Dianna, and I had missed being able to do so. The weight of the worlds seemed to lift from my shoulders when I was near her.

I did not want to tell her what danced around her. I did not want her to feel less than what she was. Hers was vibrant, yes, but it was a mix of reds and blacks with a hint of yellow. It was pure swirling chaos, like the edge of the universe itself.

My chest ached, and I found I did not enjoy sharing her attention.

I hated the playful slaps of her small hand against his chest and shoulders. I felt those were reserved for only me, yet she did the same to him.

“Apparently, their opinions mean more to you than my feelings. So, I am done. I am done trying to be your friend. I am done trying to help ease your pain, and I am so done with caring.

As soon as the door closed, every object and piece of furniture around me exploded into a thousand shards.

I had agreed to a friendship, yet I’d shown Drake and Ethan more respect. She had helped me more than she knew, and I’d mistreated her. She was right, and I needed to make amends.

“You are not my enemy,” I said flatly. Pain flashed in her eyes,

She never stopped thinking and was always calculating, figuring out how to turn a fight to her advantage. I was more than impressed with this beautiful, dangerous, magnificent woman.

I had to will myself not to reach out and drag her back. I missed her playful swats and bumps. I just missed her.

“I am not, but she still deserves someone in her life that cares about her beyond the physical acts you keep suggesting. Someone that respects her and treats her as an equal, not some pawn. She has no one but her sister.”

“I love her, but I am not in love with her. I have loved one woman in my entire existence, and she left a long time ago. I’m through with the whole love thing.”

The books were not wrong about any of that. I have always been a weapon for my throne, my kingdom, and my family. The Gods War started because of me. My world is gone because of me. How is there any room left in me to love?”

“Don’t you know? Love is the purest form of destruction there is.”

“Kaden took a piece of her out and replaced it with a piece of himself. I always assumed he had put darkness in her. It was painful and terrible. She fought for days as she tried to stay mortal and alive. And against all odds, she did. She doesn’t come from some mythic family background. She’s just a girl who survived out of sheer force of will, and that makes her stronger than us. It made her deadly.

Dianna and her sister were supposed to die that day, and he said I changed fate. He believes everything has a price.”

She may be the very creature you have been raised to destroy, but she is so much more than that. So much more. Take it from someone who lost their love. Don’t take what you feel for granted. It is worth everything.”

“I won’t let him have her.” “I hope not, because if you do, you won’t see her again.”

Kaden can’t die. You know that. Does he?”

“She cares about you. You will need to remember that to make it through what Kaden has planned.”

Her words stung, and my heart hammered in my chest. Leave me? I did not like the way that sounded, or that she’d clearly considered it.

“I’d find you.”

Dianna looked at my hand before lightly slapping it away. “Don’t touch me, and don’t try to be nice to me right now. You have Camilla breath.”

I knew nothing of love, but I knew I wanted her, needed her, and dreamed of her. It was the most inappropriate and irresponsible thing I could ever want for myself. I just wanted to feel, and a single touch from her set my body alight. I wanted her hands on every part of me, and I wanted it more than I had ever wanted anything. It was the most selfish desire in the world, but I wanted her more than a crown, more than a throne, more than air. I had confirmation that the Book of Azrael existed and the threat of war loomed, but all my thoughts centered on Dianna.

No, she couldn’t die, wouldn’t die. I would rip the very fabric of this world to atoms.

Dianna was worth it, and I would risk it all for her.

I would go to war for her.

She keeps stealing her every night for these ridiculous movies. I hear them in the living room crying and assume the worst. But they tell me it’s normal, and they enjoy it? It’s confusing. Why do women like to cry so much?”

“I don’t want my own.” And I didn’t. I needed to be close to her. I’d almost lost her. Couldn’t she see that?

I held her close, my face buried in the crook of her neck, and counted her every heartbeat, every breath. I relaxed for the first time in weeks, the tension leaving my shoulders. The old ones spoke of absolute peace beyond worlds, beyond realms, and when I held Dianna, I felt it. It was a feeling I had spent centuries searching for.

“You came for me,” she said, looking up at me through her thick lashes. I swear, I melted.

“I’d never abandon you.”