Ryan was under Robert’s spell and trying to sound more sophisticated than he actually was, but Robert wasn’t gay, so why was Ryan trying to impress him? Then I realized Ryan wasn’t gay either, so none of this mattered in the manufactured dream we existed in. But I decided to be real and started interrupting Ryan and criticized the movie and the things I didn’t like about it—it was boring, it was anticlimactic, there was no excitement, I made fun of the religious element. This was a performance and it took a physical commitment that was exhausting, but I maintained it.
