Happy Place

by Emily Henry

Just a girl with her fists in her tiny, useless women’s shorts pockets.

Very useless indeed.

I knew the only thing more painful than being without him would be being together knowing I no longer truly had him.

All the quiet made me strain for hints and clues until I became an expert in my parents’ moods.

yellow serifed font superimposed over it: THIS AIN’T MY FIRST RODEO.

“Because you puked on yours,” he says. “And when I went to get you another one, you demanded, quite vehemently, the I’ve been to so many fucking rodeos shirt.”

I don’t think she’s ever totally understood why I find it easier to fulfill other people’s expectations than to set my own.

don’t think she’s ever totally understood why I find it easier to fulfill other people’s expectations than to set my own.

“What part is that? Marilyn Monroe singing ‘Happy birthday, Mr. President’?”

Lol.

So much of life is waiting for more of him, and even that torture is bliss.

Hearts can be so stupid.

“Some things never change, and the best thing is to stop hoping they will.”

Preach.

“In every universe, it’s you for me. Even if it’s not me for you.”

we always knew Harriet was fine.”

But she wasn't fine. Not even a little bit. She has self-esteem issues, anxiety, and is a huge people pleaser. Believe me, she is not fine.

and it sure sounds like, once again, you sat there and let your life happen to you instead of fighting for what you want.”

Ouch. But very true.

I was afraid they’d ask me what went wrong, and no matter what answer I cobbled together from the rubble, they’d see right through it. They’d know I wasn’t enough.

was afraid they’d ask me what went wrong, and no matter what answer I cobbled together from the rubble, they’d see right through it. They’d know I wasn’t enough.

If I’m good enough, I’ll be happy. I’ll be loved. I’ll be safe. Instead, I’ve pushed away everyone I love.

“Love means constantly saying you’re sorry, and then doing better.”

All you can do is point yourself in a direction and hope the wind will let you get there.

Like even when something beautiful breaks, the making of it still matters.

This is how I used to think of love. As something so delicate it couldn’t be caught without being snuffed out. Now I know better. I know the flame may gutter and flare with the wind, but it will always be there.

Want is a kind of thief. It’s a door in your heart, and once you know it’s there, you’ll spend your life longing for whatever’s behind it.

I want my life to be like—like making pottery. I want to enjoy it while it’s happening, not just for where it might get me eventually.

And sure, miscommunication. Which we all hate. We hate it so much we’ve come to consider it a trope in itself. Just talk about it, we scream at our books and TVs. But in real life, for many of us, confrontation is terrifying. The thought of telling someone they hurt us, or asking if we’ve hurt them—starting a conversation whose ending we can’t predict—is terrifying. Even if we can’t name the thing we’re so afraid of on the other end. Being rejected? Knowing for certain that the person we care about doesn’t care for us in the same way? Deepening a shallow cut past the point of being able to heal?

I think, sometimes, we are simply afraid to need. We’re afraid that if we ask too much, if we bare our tenderest wounds and show our ugliest sides, we’ll find out that we aren’t lovable. That we can only keep the ones we love around us as long as we cost them nothing, create no burden.

That, at least I think, is the plight of the people pleaser. And though I set out to write one kind of story (and hopefully, on some level, succeeded!), that’s what Happy Place has really come to be about: the ways in which we fail ourselves, cut ourselves off from true, deep, fulfilling joy by trying to bend ourselves into acceptable shapes. This book, like every novel I’ve written so far, has been a kind of exorcism. It’s helped me look more closely...

But it’s also helped me see a clearer path forward to my own version of happiness and success, one that fits my shape and not the other way around. And I hope it can do that for you. I hope Harriet and Wyn’s story will remind you to ask yourself what your happy place is, a...

FOR YOUR POST–HAPPY PLACE MAINE VACATION Vacationland by Meg Mitchell Moore and Flying Solo by Linda Holmes: Moore’s tense novel about a summer of slowly surfacing secrets and betrayal and Holmes’s sweet and fun caper set in the small town of Calcasset are both perfect reads for your next visit to the Maine coast.