Don't Let Me Break

by Kelsie Rae

but it doesn’t stop the slight dip in my stomach when I see him. It’s still weird to think about. That I could’ve loved him. That he could’ve loved me.

But the weird part? It’s figuring out how much I miss him versus how much I miss the idea of him. The idea of someone accepting me in all my messy glory. The idea of having someone by my side. The idea of having someone to call at the end of a particularly amazing or crappy day. That’s what I miss. And it’s what I was reminded I’ll likely never have when he broke up with me

Whenever people ask how I’m doing or if I’m okay, I tell them I’m good. And I am. On paper, I’m fine. Mentally, though? Emotionally? It’s complicated.

I might’ve messed up on a lot of things, but there were a few things I did learn.” “Like what?” “Like sometimes, a woman’s eyes can say what her mouth refuses to.”

“For starters, I still can’t figure out the appeal of online dating. Everyone either wants to start sexting right away, or they want to know what my favorite color is and refuse to meet face-to-face. It’s exhausting.”

“Maybe you need to stop dating stupid boys who are too weak to handle a little baggage. Because trust me, one day, they’ll look back and realize yours was worth carrying.”

“Honestly? I thought it was pretty good. All guys should read romance.” I pull back, surprised. “Oh?” “Yeah. It’s literally a roadmap written by women, explaining exactly what a girl wants in her perfect guy.”

“You deserve the romance novel kind of love. The one where you can’t get enough, and you’re convinced a guy like that doesn’t exist in the real world