Beware of Chicken (Beware of Chicken, #1)

by CasualFarmer

Jin Rou had wanted to become a powerful cultivator, a master among masters, and do whatever it is the dickbags who run this place did. Which was presumably to be dicks, dickishly.

“Why didn’t you tell us that Brother Jin’s pig turned out like that?” Gou Ren snarled at his brother. “Because it was funnier this way,”

You never hear about the reasonable people. It’s always the caricatures that get the screen time.

The boar ploughed through a drift, while Gou Ren took it on the side, and he sailed through the air, slamming back down to the ground and whooping as the boar once more accelerated. Naturally, this had drawn the children, who all wanted to have a good time on the speeding pig.

I will show you the knowledge of Hong Yaowu.” Hong Xian the Elder began to teach a pig. She was a surprisingly good student.

The thing about science is that we always think of the cool shit. The giant spaceships, the cars, the guns. What most people gloss over is that most of the time, unless you’re super passionate, science is super god-damn boring.

Tigger was really good at cutting it into perfect blocks. And making ice sculptures, once I showed her how. Though I didn’t really know how to feel about the life-sized replica of me, standing triumphantly atop a pile of defeated enemies.

It was kind of strange to me, but hey, I’m not going to disrespect anybody’s customs unless those customs involve ritually sacrificing people. In which case, I’m disrespecting the shit out of them.