Have I Told You This Already?: Stories I Don't Want to Forget to Remember

by Lauren Graham

what it’s like being in a long-term relationship with New York City. (Spoiler: I love it, but it’s expensive and doesn’t always smell great.)

Sometimes we polish an experience to make facts line up more closely with feelings or exaggerate moments to make a better dinner party tale. And sometimes, mercifully, details become blurry over time, maybe because the sharp reality is too painful to carry.

I only wondered and worried about how long it was going to take. “Someday” doesn’t like to tell you when it plans to arrive.

Sometimes, mercifully, without our even asking it to, memory holds hands with fact and helps dull its edges during times when reality is too overwhelming to fully take in a joyous moment, like the birth of a child, or in a darker one, when pain is too great to comprehend, like the loss of a loved one.

“She probably wanted to see the person who made her want to do the interview in the first place.” “But that’s a character, not a person. It’s not the whole picture.” “Well, she writes for a magazine. She’s only got room for one or two pages.” But how much of me is that? I wondered. How much of a person fits on two magazine pages?

It’s very useful to always have a friend who is much older and one who is much younger. The older friend will remind you what there is to look forward to and the younger friend will keep you telling your stories over again so you’ll remember not to forget them. An older friend will tell you you have plenty of time yet, and a younger friend will make you forget time altogether because when you’re with them you’ll feel, even for a moment, that you’re the exact same age.

When life gives you lemons, you can make lemonade, but you don’t have to.

Because New York doesn’t judge, it’s just asking you to examine the choices you’ve made. It isn’t New York’s job to tell you how to feel. It shows you the signs but not what to do with them.

“Thank you, New York, for another opportunity to grow as a person!”

I asked and New York answered. What are the odds? And you tried to tell me New York was just a city. Obviously, as I have proven, New York is a person.